Why are guys so confusing sometimes?

[Victoria7869]

So there’s this guy that I’m talking to me and him we’re talking a few months ago and he lead me on and eventually went ghost and one day I was like bro wtf can u tell me what happened like I’ll leave you alone after and he was just like oh I don’t know what I want in my life atm blah blah blah and prior to that he told me he would 95% date me but the other wanted to get to know me better first so I was like okay……but then I let him have it I was like why confuse tf outta me like that then and didn’t text him afterwards. Then a day or two later he said hi and he apologized for his bad communication and just how he confused me etc so I’m like okay we’re good and mind you when I had that argument with him I made a snap like the next day and this man was the first person to add me as a friend and I added him too I didn’t wanna be petty but I was so confused after he apologized too like why’d u lead me on

then eventually we ended up having a sexual relationship and like he said he wants to be friends with benefits and friends for now and he’s not sure what he wants in life but he clearly likes me more than just a friend like he gets jealous when other guys talk to me or flirt with me and he does care about me as a person just so affectionate even in bed and the way he cuddled with me afterwards idfk im so confused like why he’s like this fr like I did forgive him the first time after he acted stupid and weird and I put my feelings for him aside and I respected his decision of just wanting a sexual relationship with me atm but I don't know this is really messing me up I don’t even like sex I just said yes so I can be near him or in his life in general I feel like a sick fuck for everything and just depressed about so much shit in life in general and this is just the cherry on top I swear to god

Updates

1 y

Like I can tell I’m in love with him I’m just hiding my feelings because I don’t wanna get hurt again I can’t deal with this

[GreekLorrd]

It sounds like you are feeling very confused and hurt by this situation. It's understandable that you are struggling with your feelings and trying to figure out what this guy wants from you. However, it's important to remember that you deserve to be with someone who is clear and honest about their intentions, and who treats you with respect and kindness.

It's also important to prioritize your own well-being and mental health. It's okay to take a step back from this situation and focus on yourself for a while. If you're feeling depressed or overwhelmed, consider reaching out to a therapist or counselor who can help you work through your emotions and develop healthy coping strategies.

Ultimately, only you can decide what is best for you in this situation. If you're feeling confused about what this guy wants or how he feels about you, it might be helpful to have an open and honest conversation with him about your feelings and concerns. But if you feel like this relationship is causing you more stress and unhappiness than joy, it's okay to walk away and focus on finding someone who is a better match for you.

[Anonymous]

So you used sex to lure him in with the hop that you can change him and turn this into a relationship.

Here's the problem: he just wants to fuck you. That's all he wants, he's told you that, and you half listened, half didn't listen. Do you know what he's going to want from you three months from now? Take a wild guess! Yes, he is going to want to park his "car" in your "garage" so he can practice pulling forward and backing up repeatedly in rapid succession.

And you'll still be saying you don't understand him when he has already told you all that you need to know.

[Victoria7869]

I didn’t use anything to lure him in lmao wtf he’s the one who did that to me knowing I wanted a relationship

[Kilapan]

I'm sure he likes you too, but maybe he's the type of guy who finds it hard to be in serious relationships.

Some people who have had few serious relationships feel that they are going too fast.

Although I also think that he is a bit unfair.
I don't know what advice I could give you. One option may be to focus on you and talk less with him, maybe that will make him decide. Another option may be to speak completely honestly with him.

[Victoria7869]

But that’s the sad thing about this is that I’ve spoken to him completely honestly about everything and how u feel about him all he ever has to say is I don't know what I want in life atm but yesterday we’re arguing cuz he left me on open knowing I hate it and it’s my pet peeve it’s disrespectful he keeps doing it when I’m saying I don’t like it and he goes we’re not together u can’t get mad at me for that I’m like bro leave it on delivered if you’re not planning on responding it’s that simple

[Victoria7869]

And then I told him I kno we’re not together and he doesn’t have to keep rubbing that in my face and he goes I don't know sometimes I feel like you forget like what the actual fuck is he on about not only that we ended up talking about him not wanting to be with me and he’s like I don't know what I want in my life atm or if I ever want that eventually even I’m like so ur saying u never had the intention to be with me to begin with but he’s like I never said that once but can’t stop you from thinking that like hello did u not read tf u just sent me like wtf does he want from me he thought I was saying I didn’t wanna fuck with him anymore and he sounded so surprised about that like what’d you expect

[Kilapan]

With what you tell me now I think you should definitely stop talking to him. At least for a time. If he writes to you, answer him, but don't worry, don't constantly check your social networks. He is not more important than your emotional well-being. Focus on your personal life, if possible do sports or some activity that distracts you. Even better if it is an activity in which you can meet more people. Meeting other people with similar tastes can help you feel more free to want to be with the guy you like.
I tell you from my experience. I was once in a situation similar to yours.

[Victoria7869]

Thank you so much for your help you’re very sweet 💕

[Victoria7869]

It’s just him showing so much affection and telling me he cares about me as a person and getting jealous every time I’m around or talking to any guy is just so weird because a man who doesn’t have any feelings for me shouldn’t feel that way and not only that he just wants us to have sex with eachother and no one else I don't know

[Kilapan]

I am glad that my comments are to your liking :)

[ImalwaysrightOK]

So you went for a guy that isn't sure, can't commit to even dating but is sure he wanted free sex without strings.

[Victoria7869]

Yea that’s my bad

[Anonymous]

The irony of this question coming from a woman is precious.

[Victoria7869]

What does that mean lol

[Opinion Owner]

It's like a hurricane complaining about a thundershower. Women are far more confusing and unpredictable than men, who are much more straightforward.

[Victoria7869]

You’re absolutely right I can’t argue with that but I don't know why he’s acting like a bitch then

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah, he's acting like a bitch. It's hard to say what he wants based on what you've shared here. I would suggest backing off and letting him take some initiative and show he cares about and values you. Don't just be there for him. If he's interested, he'll do more. If he's not, be prepared to let him go. Good luck.

[Victoria7869]

Thank you ☺️