Why don’t guys like me?

Question

A short description of what I look like. I am black well I’m mixed. I am Creole and also Cuban descent from my father. I am 89 pounds (no I am not sick I just have a fast metabolism) I turned 20 3 months ago, I don’t look my age. I’m 5’1. My personality is usually kind, introverted, compassionate, caring, if i am comfortable with certain people I have a funny side and I am currently a freshman in college. My body type is petite.

I don’t know if I am the problem but whenever I meet a nice good looking guy regardless of major or nationality we would talk. Maybe ever everyday sometimes or hangout. But if I start confessing my feelings after a good solid 3 months men just…slip away and ghost me. Some will say “oh I’m not ready for a relationship” or “I’m sorry your too skinny”. So should I do something? I don't know how to when a man’s attention. I make sure I smell good with perfumes and lotions. I even smile but is it me? Am I the problem?

RavVid · Accepted Answer

I doubt it is you. You sound the sort of girl I would go for.

It seems guys do want to talk and hang out with you so it is not that they don't want to be in your company. I get the not ready ready comment and maybe they just aren't.

I think the slipping away and ghosting must be due to that they feel under pressure. We don't like fuss and will exit stage left or right (whichever is closest) if we think there is going to be a problem.

I'm inclining to think you may be taking these guys by surprise. I think I am hanging out with a dudette and then she suddenly confesses feelings for me. I'm in a different boat to what I thought I was. Maybe these feelings are confessed intently which scares the bejeezus out of me i. e I'm in deeper than I ever suspected without warning. So stage left/right.

What I am going to suggest is to express partiality for the guy earlier. "You're so handsome". "Your biceps are so big". Whatever you genuinely like about him. It is signalling you like him and he has time to assimilate that info. The benefit for you is that he doesn't feel he can or wants to reciprocate he'll bail early and you won't have wasted three solid months.

The final point is guys all don't like the same type of girl. Some guys like large breasts. Some like me like small boobies. So if a guy has a preference for double D's it isn't isn't personal and you shouldn't take it that way. You just have to wait for a guy who fancies your cup size. I'm simply presuming your are in the smaller cup size range because you said you are 89 lbs with a fast metabolism but that is simply a jump in the dark on my part. Plus breast size isn't as important as it is cracked up to be. And I'm just talking about breast size in a collective sense of what we like in a girl because it is the most obvious attribute.

David4358 · Accepted Answer

can't comment on your looks with if you are "to skinny" without seeing you.

And yeah if your dating guys that are also in their 20s they are not going to want to settle down at that age. So you could be freaking them out.

So date older guys or hold off freaking them out until they are older..

and find guys that are into skinny girls. as long as it healthy skinny and not unhealthy guys are out there that are into that

dragoblack · Answer

There is nothing wrong with being petite. Social media may rave about "thicc" , but in reality guys really do like petite women. If weight is your issue, there is always working out to gain some muscle weight.

Don't count yourself short for guys not asking you out, the dating society has been all messed up for a great while and many people have been going for hookups instead of getting to know each other.

You're still young, you have time. Work on yourself to get to where you feel happy with your own body and looks. Work on acknowledging your insecurities and work on getting over them. Do what makes you happy and feel amazing

Unit1 · Answer

oh sweetie. you remind me of my problem with girls not being interested in me. girls could tell me the same things but regardless the outcome remains the same.

it's not you. it's them. they are not willing for dating. it's simple as that. tell yourself that and believe it. it'll make things easier.

Pohjolan · Answer

If you are just friendly for 3 months and look like their little sister then you shouldn't be surprised if they see you as a friend and not a potential mate at that point.

Moreover you may not be the only one showing interest towards a nice good looking guy, in a period of 3 months.

My advice is that you have to strike while the iron is hot instead of waiting for it to cool off.

Guy1988 · Answer

You are not the problem and there is nothing wrong with being skinny! Everything has their own time and you are destined to meet somebody who would not ghost you! Just wait for that moment and enjoy life! Life can be pretty exciting and fun even without a partner i can tell you that!!

Anonymous · Answer

You're punching above your weight. It's fine to want a relationship. If fine to want a cute guy. But you need to be realistic with what you're working with.

Fuentes · Answer

89 pounds and 5'1? If that's possible which maybe it is then you're very tiny. That could be a reason yes and yeah u probs shouldn't wait 3 months to confess because most men will become uninterested waiting that long

Summeroflove · Answer

Because not everyone will. You’ll find the right guy when it’s time

Fes13 · Answer

Hog wash, they r tired of you beating them. Of you out liking them, always you're ahead in greets, attention always caring for them.  They don't have a chance to reciprocate, return the favor

JamesRandiDebates · Answer

It sounds like you're not giving up the poon. You need to make it worth a guy's time to stick around you. Work on your sex game, give some blowjobs.

NostalgiaSenpi · Answer

Madam, you sound attractive. Maybe you haven't met the right guy. Life happens for good or bad.

Why don’t guys like me?

Most Helpful Opinions

What Guys Said

Why don’t guys like me?

Most Helpful Opinions

What Guys Said

We're glad to see you liked this post.