Why do men avoid or ghost girls after sex with them?

[Anonymous]

In my situation we have known each other years through work, the past year or two things have a look at been relationship like without anything physical. Things slowly started progressing the past few months until 4 weeks ago we slept together, it was planned but after we both admitted it was a long time coming. He’s always said he cared for me, and I genuinly felt that to be true. We would speak daily and meet often, hold hands, cuddle. But since sleeping together he’s completely ignored me, or been blunt with replies if any. I actually feel physically sick inside, that he would do this. What would be the reason, I understand men use girls for sex, but he could have used anyone why someone he was close too? Surely he’s got to miss me, I was part of his life for years he can’t just forget I exist. Could it be the sex was bad, I mean I thought it was good but you never know.

Updates

+1 y

Just an update. He actually texted me this morning, a stupid comment like “are you alive?” Anyway I have mo opened it and I’m leaving him to sweat a few days!

[lightbulb27]

I think to a woman, sex is often bonding and to a man, it is a release. It's bonding for men as well, but it is a relief/release.. in conflict. So after that... then what... should we stay and go back?

That's emotional and logistical questions that swirl in our minds. Rather than deal with that stuff which is sometimes a mess, we ignore it and do something else. In the process... days go by. Things can crop up... shame, is this right, what about work issues, will the boss find out, etc..

Whether he was using you, I don't know.

you'll have to wait and/or try to re-engage and figure out what is what. It's awful. There is an old system of courting and mating that worked quite a bit better... court... get rings, get married, etc.. But modern society threw it into the trash can in favor of "womens liberation". You are living in this time and it, seems to be a step backwards. People haven't evolved much. So you are suffering emotional pains that are old, but created by new "create" ivdeas, that look flawed.

[BoopBoopBeep]

All this with a grain of salt since I've never ghosted anyone, but was the sex compatible? It doesn't have to be "bad" or anyone's fault, but I like mushrooms on my pizza and you like sausage kind of thing. I've never known someone to ghost someone they had already invested that much time and energy into... being your friend for all those years. Did you maybe get clingy afterwards? That can be a turnoff. I wasn't there obviously, so I don't know, and I'm not trying to blame YOU, just ask questions that you might be able to answer.

[Asker]

I know. What’s how I feel; cuz I know him. I really know him. I’ve known him for nearly 17 years and I feel like I know he wouldn’t do this to me…. Although he is. It’s surreal really. It’s funny you should mention the compatibility as that’s something he has mentioned before when talking of us ever having sex. As far as I’m aware it went perfect, I mean I’m pretty submissive and anything he wanted I was happy to do. The next day he messaged first, and spoke all day as usual, but since then I’ve not heard from him, and he doesn’t reply. 🤷‍♀️

[summiter]

I'm sure he loved the sex... how do you feel it went? He just may be unsure how to proceed from a friendship to a boyfriend/girlfriend sexual friendship. Call him and ask him to meet up and it is ok to ask him where he wants the friendship/relationship to go.

[inhua]

girls who get ghosted have nothing more to offer than sex appeal or at least they're not trying to show they have more to offer which is often the detriment of the feminist doctrine where men must prove their loyalty to women but women don't have to prove shit to men until it comes back to bite them later on

[spartan55]

Yeah, keep playing games, I'm sure it will work out.

[Asker]

Why should I reply the second he decides to reach out when he’s blanked me for three weeks. I’m happy to never reply again.

[spartan55]

Well, you blanked him for weeks too, so what is does it matter?

[Asker]

I haven’t I have messaged him lots

[spartan55]

Okay, you didn't mention that.

[boggboss]

Clearly u valued the situation more then him its easy to say stuff and mean none of it or for it to be surface deep

[shades777]

Probably because if if took to long to get it he's not willing to jump through hoops for a second time, that why making a man wait is a recipe for failure

[Wise4myage]

Guys that treat girls like that are usually just out to smash.

[Aiko_E_Lara]

Same reason why women avoid or ghost men after sex with them or when they got the gift they wanted.

[Anonymous]

:::: unfurls "mission accomplished" banner.::::😆😆😆

[In_Trance]

For the same reason women do it to men