What does he want?

[Anonymous]

So there’s a guy at the gym that stares very intently at me. Like he holds a gaze for multiple seconds. He tries to make eye contact with me and holds it until I look away. He stares at me when I’m working out, he is intentional about being around me. Whenever I leave, he leaves right after me, and then walks to his car and stands next to it, and then just stares at me while I drive away. He did this twice. The next time he left after me, he waited by the door and watched me leave maybe because he realized it seemed creepy and he didn’t want it to be like that. A couple days ago he actually left before me and I thought that was so weird. I left and I looked over for his car and it wasn’t there so I assumed he left. But then, once I got to my car, he had actually pulled his car around to be right in front of mine, and he was standing outside of his car just staring at me. So then I thought maybe he’s a stalker. But the last two nights he hasn’t even been at the gym and he knows I’m there. Wouldn’t he go to the gym if he’s as interested as he seems? I’m so confused. Is he waiting for me to talk to him? Can someone please explain any ideas? He’s pretty good looking. Very strong Hispanic man probably in his 30s. ( he’s very good looking, so doesn’t seem like he needs to be a creep) I’m 42 and get a lot of looks at the gym. I’m in great shape, tall, long blonde hair (above average looking) also, I’m married and he’s probably seen my ring.

He’s a creep

He wants a hookup and for me to initiate

He’s not that interested, but when he sees me he’s temporarily obsessed

[8UniquelyBoring8]

It's understandable that this behavior is making you uncomfortable, and it's important to prioritize your safety. While it's impossible to know exactly what his intentions are, his behavior does seem to be crossing boundaries and making you feel uneasy. It's always a good idea to trust your instincts and take precautions to protect yourself.
If this continues, you might consider speaking to someone at the gym, like a manager or staff member, to see if they can help monitor the situation. Additionally, you could try to subtly and politely make it clear to him that his behavior is unwelcome, for example by avoiding eye contact and not engaging in conversation.

Most importantly, if you feel genuinely threatened or unsafe, do not hesitate to contact local law enforcement and let them know what's going on. It's always better to be proactive and stay safe.

[Asker]

Thanks, I appreciate your answer. Good ideas

[YesterdaysChild]

He could also be a serial killer scoping you out. Just think, any of these times he could have snuck up and abducted you. Maybe you should change gyms or report him to the police. Or, you could ask him when you are at the gym why he is staring at you and hear it from him.

[Anonymous]

I guess I can’t get over the fact that you’re married, not even just a boyfriend. Why are you engaging in this? Are you unsatisfied in your relationship? Bored? Wanting to know if you “still got it”? The grass isn’t greener on the other side, it’s greener where you water it. Maybe you should reconnect with your man so you can disregard the stranger playing eye tag.

[Iron_Man]

He’s attracted to you

[Asker]

Then why hasn’t he spoken with me? Why is he waiting by my car? Does he want me to say something?

[Iron_Man]

He’s extremely shy, afraid of rejection

[Asker]

Thank you

[Iron_Man]

Sure…

[Anonymous]

He is a creep. Beware!