When a guy asks you to be his girlfriend, does that mean he envisions being together for several months?

[Bethany22]

Especially a guy that has only gone on 3 dates with you. Would a guy say that to all girls on the 3rd date as the thing to say to get sex, and so I should still wait a bit before introducing him to people as my boyfriend? Or like what does it usually mean when a guy asks a girl to be his girlfriend?

[Leowolf13]

It really just depends. Asking by third date seems to be a little soon. But if the person I’m dating shares a lot of similar values and interests, and we’re hitting it off well, then I’m going to try to appreciate their value as quality person and perhaps I’d ask if they want to be exclusive. Late 20’s, if I’m asking her to be my girlfriend, I have marriage on my mind as a potential. Sex would be a byproduct of how things went, not my first intention. 3rd date boyfriend might be a little soon unless he could be the one.

[RealMarek]

The only way you can know is by asking him. If I asked someone to be my girlfriend, I would mean that I want to date her exclusively. You can ask him “So, are you saying you want to be exclusive?” If you both want that, then you can say you still want to take the physical side of the relationship slowly, or wait until marriage, or whatever you envision. If you can communicate with a man clearly and get clear, unambiguous responses, that’s a good thing.

[FunkyMonkee]

I don't know about other guys, maybe most guys do that, I have no way of knowing. I know SOME do! But, if I were to ask a girl to be my girlfriend (and, from what I recall, that's never happened. So far, every time I've gotten together with one, it's because SHE instigated it.), it just means I want her to be my girlfriend. If she feels sex is gonna be part of that as soon as she says, "yes", then, so be it but, if it takes another several months for us to get into that, that's fine by me. I asked her because I felt something special for her, not just to be able to fuck her. If she feels the same for me, sex will come, eventually. When she's ready. And, most likely, when I'm ready although, that's usually any time.

[provokeesmokee]

Usually, yeah, someone asking to be your boyfriend is wanting to be with you for a while.

Definitely some guys use it to get in girls' pants, but there's also a good amount of guys who are genuine about it. And a good amount who are mixed about it - they want both to get in your pants and to have a good relationship.

But instead of asking internet strangers, why don't you have that talk with this guy? Ask him what he sees with you in a relationship, and what you see in a relationship with him.

Opinions from other people can be valuable context, but they're hardly the driving narrative behind your relationship. You and your maybe boyfriend build that together.

[ArrowheadSW]

I think normally it does mean that he envisions being together for at least a few months. The "unknown" is how long it will last because we don't really know what issues will arise or incompatibilities there will be. And most relationships are temporary anyway. But him asking after only 3 dates is a little early.

[AmeerX]

First, stop thinking sex is going to tie a man down. Learn to say no to every tom dick and Harry. That 3rd date rule is just a made up thing.

If you want to marry a guy just tell him you want that in the least desperate way. Second, if you want a man then value what he values, don't go about how you have a career and all, that's really a weak thing. Everyone has stomach to feed so if someone says she has a career congratulations but it's not going to change something. Working women are good but they need to understand that work is secondary to forming a family

[love_conquers_lust]

My ex girlfriend asked me after a few weeks. I told her we weren’t anything because her birthday was coming up in a few days. She called me later that night crying and I told her what my plan was and that the surprise was ruined. Does it sound like I only wanted sex?

[Leowolf13]

You sound like a jerk or an idiot. Doing that stuff to a girl will not be funny or clever to them, or anybody. It would have made her birthday 10 x’s better if you had said yes to begin with and then she could go into her birthday more excited because she has a boyfriend to celebrate with. Sounds like you need to rethink how to interact with women..

[love_conquers_lust]

@Leowolf13 We’d been dating for a month and her birthday was 3 days away, I hadn’t planned on her asking about that. I was half the age I am now. A jerk would have had no intention of making her a girlfriend at all.

But sure, I am a bit of a pig. I won a her a human size stuffed animal warthog at an amusement park with my friends. Her Mom was kind enough to let me surprise her by placing it on her bed when she wasn’t home.

[Bethany22]

@Leowolf13 A very good point. She would have been so much happier at her birthday knowing she had a boyfriend to celebrate it with

[Leowolf13]

@Bethany22 I agree with your agreement of my point haha. Thank you.

[love_conquers_lust]

@Bethany22 @leowolf13 She was going to have one regardless if she’d accepted. After I told her the surprise was ruined, I said I wasn’t mad about it and that I was glad she called. It showed that she cared. I was trying to stall and do something fun for her. Best intentions and whatnot.

[love_conquers_lust]

@Bethany22 @leowolf13 But if it happens again and I can avoid hurting a girl’s feelings, I’ll change my approach.

[scooogy]

Interesting details, as I've been introduced as the boyfriend by a single-mom on the second date. I mean we talked much on the first date going for a walk by the lake and even had pizza at a restaurant, but despite being together for several months we never had sex despite me hinting on it.

As to your situation, I wonder why people would actually ask for it, whilst others would say you feel it once you're ready.

[007kingifrit]

telling the difference between a man wanting sex and wanting love is one of the hardest things a woman will ever have to do and the truth is there is no certain way to tell.

but what it means is he would want a relationship. does he? i don't know. he could be lying. but as a man i will never know this issue

[curlyfirecracker]

He's not sure, but doesn't want to say no to long term, but can't say yes. Likes you, wants to keep you, not thinking future. Some might. Doesn't want anyone else to grab you. 😊

[BoopBoopBeep]

It means I'm going to stop sleeping with other people. I'm not really "envisioning" anything about several months. You don't suck as a person... let's see where this goes.

[shortster]

For me it means that I like you and want to take our relationship to the next level to determine if we are compatible for marriage.

[Lisia]

It means he wants you as his girlfriend. You could ask if he's looking for a long-term or short-term relationship.

[Anemone978]

I never experienced that so I assume he probably likes you and wants to be together..

[OfMiceandMen]

I think he is implying that he would like to see you exclusively and long term.

[jogeb907433]

I don't want loves, only those horny ones, after a while I may abandon her, there are millions of women and the options vary.

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

I would think he wants you to be his girlfriend

[loveslongnails]

Not necessarily. It means "be my girlfriend - now and in the immediate future".

[Prettywhenicryy]

Girl men will promise marriage to get nookie. How do you think I lost my virginity.

[Likes2drive]

It means he is really interested in you and sees a dating future and relationship

[DextroShade]

A guy should not be the one to ask for a relationship, the woman should do that.

[Sparkie460]

I only asked girls out that I thought I wanted to grow old with.

[YAsQuen]

how about u guys can be boyfriend girlffriend and not fuck for some time?

[ProbablyClueless]

Hopefully longer than a few months, right?

[Mansearching]

Why so short amount of time?

[Coden7]

He wants something long term

[Jennz6]

I would hope so

[Anonymous]

It means he wants sex and that's it.

[zagor]

Could be either.

[Night_Angel]

varies from person to person.

[jahaims]

Depends on the guy