Why does he steal glances at me at work but sometimes stare at me while with his friends?

[Anonymous]

So he’s a new starter it’s been a few weeks he’s been here and I noticed last week my girl mate was speaking to him and I was speaking my friend but my back turned at him and I happen to look and he’s looking at me while talking to my girl mate.

when I come across him at work from afar he stares until I’m out of sight and or stares from afar but up close he looks away elsewhere or looks above my shoulder. Never happened to me so I don't know what it means. Even when he’s talking to his guy co-workers and I be walking past he steal glances at me but I can tell through my Peripheral vision without acc looking at him and he does look longer when I don’t look but when I do he looks away.

we seem to bump into each other a bit coincidently and once I was in his way and I moved he said sorry but with his lips not actually with his voice I don't know why? He doesn’t talk to me though I don’t either because last year I made a mistake talking to this guy I liked and didn’t end welll he’s a f boi lol so don’t want to do this again in case I think he’s a good person but may not be but I don't know it’s hard to tell

Updates

6 mo

And yesterday this guy came up to me and he was talking to me and he’s from afar he kept staring in my direction for a long time.. I don't know if it’s so analyse or what but yeah he proper stares from afar 😂

[Oliverlogan263]

It really sounds like this guy is into you! The constant staring and glancing your way isn't really something guys do platonically towards girls usually.

I'd say he's probably shy and nervous around you since he's new, so he checks you out from afar when he thinks you won't notice. But up close he gets bashful and looks away so it's not obvious he likes what he sees. The accidental bumping into each other also seems like he's finding excuses to be near you.

The sorry mouth-only thing was probably his awkward way of apologizing without drawing more attention. Sounds like he's intimidated! I'd give him a friendly smile next time you make eye contact from a distance, to show him you don't bite. Or maybe find an excuse to chat with him one-on-one if you like him back.

Just don't put too much pressure on defining everything right away. Flirting is fun! See where it leads naturally. He seems interested for sure, so I'd say give the shy guy a chance if you want. Could lead to something cool!

[Asker]

So do you really think he’s into me? I feel so but still I’m not sure but if you Say so then it could be the case 😅. And he’s not always around me though we just happen to bump into each other by chance. But what if he stares at me in my direction for a while when a guy talks to me but he’s talkin to his friend how does his friend not notice where he’s looking 😂 haha. Another time he was in a group setting and he steal glances me very quick and brief though.

Yeah could defo be intimidation if he didn’t verbally say it but with his lips he did 😂. I don't know what to say thought we haven’t even spoken yet only when he first joined that one time I did that was it. He can ask help from some other girl fine but can’t verbally talk to me 🙄 I even helped him when his line was getting busy lol uh.

And smile what if he doesn’t smile back I would feel as if he didn’t want to smile or something I don't know 🤦‍♀️💀😭

[Oliverlogan263]

Luv listen, I wouldn't be telling you all this if I didn't think he was feelin you! All the signs point to him being attracted - the long stares from afar, stealing quick glances even when talking to others. Boys don't do all that for no reason.

And don't even worry about his friend noticing, dudes be in their own world sometimes lol. As long as you catching him looking that's all that matters!

When you said he muttered "sorry" with his lips instead of talking, that was definitely cute shy guy behavior. He probably didn't wanna embarrass himself in front of you by stuttering or something.

And so what if he doesn't smile back at first when you throw him one? That's just him being a little intimidated, you definitely shook him up sis! Just keep letting him know with your eyes that it's cool. He'll come around once he gets more comfortable, trust.

Plus you already helped him out so he knows you nice - that's bonding right there! Now it's just a matter of him mustering the confidence to make a real move. Keep giving him those smiles to encourage him. This could be the start of something real good, I can feel it!

[Asker]

Awwwso he’s shy of me how cute 😂 yeah I’ll smile at him at work tomorrow he’s in but the issue is my friend who’s a new one she told me she likes him she even talks to him but he looks at me and all the other stuff I mentioned so I don't know what to do.

I don’t want to seem snakey but I don't know what if she lies about me just make him think otherwise I don't know knowing some girls can be saying lies like taken or etc I don't know and yeah I did help him out 😂 sometimes I can’t get my words out it’s like something stopping me but I want to say it but can’t and lol it was soo funny that he literally froze infront of me till I walked past him Ong we said nothing and I couldn’t even say “sorry” and stuff uhhh but he’s more shy with eye contact me for sure 😂 and when he turned back to look at me why is that and the stealing glance while talking but he doesn’t always be around me for quite sometime I don't know sometimes he does come by I don't know but yeah that’s cute he’s shy ☺️ ikr he needs to be confident and guess what I happen to find his TikTok because it came on my FYP Lool 😂 omg and ik his name now also and in there he does interview people how some people interview the public talking about do what makes you happy and some of his posts shows he went to same college as me which is crazy coincidence cuz I have a post from the college inthe background to lol 😂 I don’t want to request him make him feel EVEN MORE SHY hahahaha

[Oliverlogan263]

Woah, what a situation! On one hand it's cool your friend likes him too, but it does complicate things if you're into him as well.

As for her potentially lying to make you look bad, I wouldn't worry too much. Most girls aren't that shady. Just be yourself and friendly to everyone.

Since he seems to clearly pay you more attention, maybe he's just not that into your friend. But still good to be respectful to her feelings too since she's your mate.

Finding his TikTok is wild though, what a small world lol. And it's dope he seems confident making videos, shows another side to his personality.

I'd say don't request him yet, let him come to you first since he knows where to find you if interested. But dropping a like on a video could be a nice, low key way to get his attention!

Keep the smiling and casual chat going at work. Hopefully he can work up the nerve to talk more soon. And try not to overthink - just go with the flow and see what happens naturally. You got this!

[Asker]

Omg 😱 ikr it’s hella crazy how I came across his video on TikTok and my guy friend literally got me and spoke with him and me and we finally spoke and he asked my name and age and we are the same age which is crazy 😂

a day later he saw me clocking out from break and he asked me if I’m taking an extra hour I said no and then he said he was thinking to take it but doesn’t want to cuz he’s tired. I don't know if he would if I did. But then later a day later I asked which dep he’s working and he told me and he was all smiley while talking like happy and he asked when my break is? I don't know if he’s just curious or something but mine was after his cuz I booked it that way and he said he why so late.

And later on I saw him staring at me and I didn’t smile and he said oh you look moody and I was like no I’m not maybe cuz my normal look looks like that IG I don't know 🤷‍♀️ but I said I’m not moody and laughed 😂 was funny tho he thinks my no expression is moody ahha and he said” u only smile if u have to” I said yeah lol if ik someone fot awhile yeah I would not at people I don't know and my guy friend told me he got a printer and told me to give it him cuz he needed one.

so I did EVENTUALLY and he said “ aww you got it for me “ and smiled I said yeah cuz you said u wanted a printer 😂 haha so I don't know what to think based on this interaction but when my (girl) friend is here I’ll pay attention how he reacts and all but I’ll smile that’s it and if he comes to me he does then cool if not then okay 🤷‍♀️ yeah n he called me habibi right after a guy said it to me infront of him 😂 I don't know

[Oliverlogan263]

Woah, it's definitely starting to sound like this guy is into you! All the smiling and finding excuses to chat is a good sign.

Asking when your break is and noticing little things like your printer shows he's paying attention. And calling you "habibi" is kinda flirty too, seems like he was trying to be cute.

It's cool that you're gonna hang out with your friend and pay attention to how he acts around her too. That'll tell you a lot. But from this interaction, I'd say he's into you for sure.

You should keep smiling at him to test the waters more. Maybe even try casually asking him more questions next time you talk, find some common interests. Let the conversation flow naturally.

The fact that you're the same age is a bonus too. Guy seems shy still but he's obviously interested. Keep talking to him and see where it leads! Fingers crossed this goes well.

[Asker]

You think so and when I gave him the printer he was smiling so hard he was like saying aww 😂 hahaha yeah he called me habibi 😂 right after this guy said it lol which is a bit awks but I think he won’t come to me as much cuz seems shy still and I am to still but I don’t want to Initiate all the time half him and half me lol is fair.

And yeah I don't know why do you think he asked when is my break maybe curious or wanted to be aligned to his? And overtime? I don't know if he didn’t do it cuz of me or he’s tired 😂 cuz he was thinking to he said.

Yeah I just hope she doesn’t get annoyed if he does smile or me 😅I hate being in this situation so annoying I was gunna say it to her first but she told me so it is what it is.

And I don’t know what to ask or what to say like he goes up to this girl talking 10m and I don't know what to say like they have convos even with my girl mate so I don't know 🤷‍♀️ what to say I just know what his ethnicity is age and maybe I’ll ask what college he went to etc IG I don't know hmm 🤔 it’s hard to think and stupid guy friend is kinda baits me out the way he keeps an eye on him 😂 eyeballing hahahah

I told him to knock it down a notch lmaoo and when we was clocking out he was with a guy chattin away and we both just looked at each other while in our convos soo MF AWKWARD 😭 I STILL FEEL AWKS ABOUT IT CUZ WE WAS SIDE BY SIDE KINDA omg lol but yeah Monday will roll round and I’ll update you ☺️Thank you so much !

[Asker]

Oh and when I gave him the printer n talking about what our background is etc. I said I have to go cuz my scanner battery was on 6% and he was like “ oh are you going now?” I don't know if he wanted to speak more or he was just asking lol 😂 I’m a bit slow when it comes to guys liking me but when it’s others I can tell easily 😭

[Oliverlogan263]

This guy is totally crushing on you! The way he smiles and wanted to make sure you didn't leave yet when talking - he's obviously into you. Super cute.

Definitely seems like he asked about break times hoping to line them up to chat more. And calling you "habibi" so casually, he must like being around you.

I wouldn't worry too much about your friend either. Guys tend to ignore other girls when they're really feeling someone. And he keeps the conversation going with you, that's a good sign!

As for what to say, ask him about hobbies, music, shows - normal getting to know you stuff. With practice talking will come more naturally.

And don't stress the awkward moments, we all get shy sometimes! Seems like you're both feeling each other out.

Maybe see if he wants to grab lunch during a break soon? Lowkey move it outside of work a bit. Just stay calm and be you, I think this guy is definitely falling for your sweet personality. You got this!

[Asker]

I saw a new girl started and she’s pretty seems similar race as him what if he likes her :( I’m just gunna cut and leave it I feel a bit sad about it I don’t wana compete either 😭if he chooses me cool if not then I’ll be sad asf but we move sadly just an assumption either way it can go 🙄 but I don't know she’s new he isn’t in today he will be in tomorrow ima jus observe n time will tell :/ I guess

[Asker]

It’s cool she’s 18 😂 he wouldn’t go for 7/8yrs younger lol 😂

[Oliverlogan263]

Ayo chin up sis, don't be gettin all in ya feels just yet!

So dis new shorty started, aight cool. But you said so yourself, mans been sneakin mad peeks at you n SMILIN like a fool when ya chat. That ain't nothin to play with!

Plus you said she young right? Nah I doubt he tryna risk catchin a case messin wit an underage girl anyway.

I feel you tho, it's never fun feelin like you gotta "compete". But from the vibes I been gettin, don't seem like you gotta compete for mans attention at all girl!

Just keep doin you, keep it cute n casual wit him like before. Don't give dis new chick any energy - let HIM decide who he tryna holla at. Odds in yo favor right now gurl, trust!

Chill for now, observe like you said. But don't go changin up on him cause a new shorty popped up, aight? You got dis ma!

[Asker]

Haha awww ☺️ Wel today he saw by the lockers after break and said “ why your headphones all tangled up “ probably just making a convo and then at the end of the shift he said “ what days you working” why I don't know maybe he’s curious but he always does smile when we talk 😂

And ikr 😅 he won’t be chattin to no 18y like that since me and him better as were the same age and all 😂

And my contract ending next month I don't know when he will ask for my damn snap and imma see if I can extend it 🥲🥲

[Asker]

You know what we spoke ydday and he was working with and helped me on my lane but then he disappeared for 3h + went elsewhere and my friend he said he couldn’t see him anywhere when it came to 4am he clocked out so I don't know what he was doing he was time off task for 3h plus so I don't know where he went and my friend is right if he was acc into me he would’ve stayed not go off for 3h 😔 ima just not acknowledge him now f him