My F-W-B male 32. Refuses to tell me how many women he’s screwing other than myself. Why is he doing this?

[Anonymous]

I’ve messed with him almos 4 years now. Him alone. Ever since I started with him back in 2020. He refuses to tell me how many side chicks there are.
I actually don’t care. It’s not like I’m serious about him. It’s not like he will ever marry me. Why does he refuse to tell me?

I've asked time and time again. And he lies saying it’s only me. When it’s obvious that’s not the case. One other time he told me he doesn’t have sex that much. Or he doesn’t have time for too much sex. Again insinuating that it’s only me.

He refuses to give me a number or any sort of information! It’s in my interest for my health to know the truth.

He also goes outside of the country to be passport bro. And yes he’s Black. I’m White. A Pale white Latina.

Updates

2 mo

All I got is responses from unselect betamales that can’t compete with Chad and Tyrone. By bodycount is 2. Me being with F-W-B is none of your business. If I desire 3 boyfriends at once that’s my fucking desire and wish.

That doesn’t answer the question at all. Answer the question. Don’t come here to tell me how your incompetent, an unselect undesirable.

[Apple1996]

He should at least tell you for safety like you don't wanna catch something If he's sleeping with a new girl every week. It's really more that he should tell you the last time he was with someone. Not so much the amount

[Apple1996]

And I don't know why everyone else in these comments are being weird about this. friends with benefits is still a type of relationship and has to have some communication going on between the two of you

[Asker]

For sure. Well I’m done with him. My health more important than some action.
He refuses to tell me like it’s the ultimate secret or some shit

[Apple1996]

Yeah I don't blame you id cut things off to

[Anonymous]

I’m just here to say 😳😳😳 it’s been 4 years since 2020? And also sorry your friends with benefits won’t divulge his number.

[Prezzi3]

To be honest, it seems like you want this to be more than it is, you’re more invested emotionally than he is. See I could never do friends with benefit because it would drive me insane thinking about who he with/isn’t with when he not with me. Who he seggings and isn’t seggings. What stds who could bring back to me and vice versa.

If you want to know the number of women he fudging due to health reasons, I don’t think the number would really tell you anything. I known people who slept with only one person and caught an std. I have known people who slept with over ten plus people and was clean. The number doesn’t matter, what you should ask him is before you sleep with this person or people, are you having them show paperwork that they are clean? Or you just fudging everything that walks without having that conversation first

Growl, I think four year of that is enough. Deep down you keep waiting for him to figure out that your all that he needs and that your enough for him, but he not going to come to that conclusion. If you can’t set your feelings aside, leave. If you decide to stay, always use protection with him or yell both can get tested before seggs.

[Asker]

Nah I don’t want him for relationship. He’s not all that or gives me any sort of butterflies or anything like that.

However he keeps pushing me away. Barely meets my sexual needs. I’m barely getting action from him anymore.
It’s like he found something better. And I’m sexually frustrated. So for closure I guess I just wanted to know the amount of women he was dealing with. I’m just gonna go get tested and find a partner for life. That’s it. 😒😒
But man he was good in bed

[Prezzi3]

How would knowing the amount of women give you closure?

[RavVid]

New girls are always more sexually exciting. Technically it is called the Coolidge effect which you can google. Since you have been having sex with him for 4 years you are naturally low down in priority list of the girls he is having sex with.

So It is not surprising he just has you in maint mode - just giving you barely enough sex to meet your needs and to keep you in his harem. The girl that will be top of the list is the one he has just met.

Even so he will still want to retain you in the harem and that is exactly why he doesn't want to give you closure by telling you the number of girls. He won't until he decides you are more trouble than you are worth sexually to him.

[Asker]

@RavVid
So you’re saying I need to be more troublesome for him to finally expose that?

[RavVid]

It might work that way. He might walk away saying he has a dozen better girls or he might walk away saying you are too much a pain in the ass and block you.

You are never going to know though because he may have cycled through three dozen friends with benefits's. Some discontinuing him and him discontinuing some. Plus hook ups plus prostitutes overseas.

Some traumatic events have kept coming back into my mind every 5 minutes and causing anguish each time till I let go. I would like you to avoid that fate for your mental health.

At this point it is best for you to have an STD check so you have certainty on the health side. and decide if you want to continue or discontinue the friends with benefits arrangement.

It seems to me friends with benefits in addition to sex does also have an ersatz relationship side to it in that at least you can chat as well as have sex. Having a nominal appearance of a relationship might be doing you harm in that it gives you enough that you don't need to look for something more substantive.

[Asker]

@RavVid
You’re right it’s shitty.
But he’s the 2nd only individual I’m intimate with. I feel too comfortable with him.

It sucks that now I have to get out there again, and start all over and search all over again. And put the work in.

at least with this dynamic I didn’t have to worry about a cheating boyfriend cause I just accepted the deal.

But now it’s over. This was a yo-yo friends with benefits , it was never supposed to last this long. 4-years. But the sex was unbelievable. I don’t know if I’ll ever find that again

[Prezzi3]

I don’t think you need to be in a relationship or anything right now. Seems like you have a hard time being honest with yourself and you’re willing to accept crumbs. I said that because of this line “I accepted this dynamic because I didn’t have to worry about a cheating boyfriend cause I accepted the deal.” Technically, you were still worried about him being with other girls, that’s why you even asked this question. You are worth someone who is going to be fully committed to you and only you. That starts with some self work and getting some healing.

[RavVid]

I'm glad it is over for you so you can build a better life which is less illusory. We are designed to bond over sex. Perhaps we are successful in avoiding bonding but that is self penalizing because it takes away something that is joyous.

I understand the sex side. The best lay of my life was extra-ordinary intuitive; she knew more about my cock than I did! I make every girl do her signature moves. It isn't as good because the average girl isn't as intuitive.

But an average girl that was willing to bond was a far better deal than this marvelous lay.

Good hunting!

[Screenwriter]

I think the fact that he's solely a friends with benefits is why he isn't telling you. You are not close friends, you are not boyfriend/girlfriend. This is the whole thing ABOUT friends with benefits.

You're sex partners. As long as you're having safe sex with each other, your health is not impacted by how many other people either of you has sex with.

It's not your business because of your status as sex partners only.

And since he's NOT telling you, he doesn't WANT to tell you.

I think you should stop harassing him about this. Does he ask you this question? If he doesn't, that tells you how he feels about your asking the converse.

Your other choice is to end the relationship, and this will not matter. It's up to you.

[Asker]

One time he did ask me if I’m dating anyone. So yes he has.
And I should for safety.
What are you re—arded..

[Screenwriter]

And you are mistaken and I am NOT retarded. He is a sex partner. It is completely up to him what he does or doesn't reveal to you. If you want completely safe sex then you need to stop having it with someone you are not in a committed relationship with.

You could demand that he give you a hot off the presses STD test. Which means as of the date he took the test he had nothing. But that is no guarantee beyond the date and time of that test.

The fact that he asked you ONCE has no comparison to the obsession that you have about how many people HE has sex with. And unless all of THOSE people have been tested and they hand over tests to you and him... do you see how complicated this is BECAUSE YOU ARE ONLY SEX PARTNERS?

If you want these kinds of guarantees, you need to stop having sex with a person who WILL NOT REVEAL THESE FACTS TO YOU.

It's you who are acting retarded to demand this from someone who is not committed to you.

[RavVid]

It seems it does matter to you though I get the sexual health aspects.

Unless it is a declared monogamous relationship (and this isn't) than I don't think you have the right to demand that information. You should just assume he is doing as many as he can and maybe 3 or 4 a day when he is doing sex tourism.

Obviously use condoms and be aware of their inherent limitations and have a STD test schedule. I think you are entitled to ask what his test schedule is.

The passport bro concept and sex tourist concept are different by the way

[Asker]

Passport Bro is Sex Tourism

[RavVid]

Different. There is intent to live in the country and find a partner with passport bros. Sex tourism objective is to have a lot sex with prostitutes.

[Asker]

No male passport bro has married any female overseas. They travel for cheat ass. In disadvantaged nations

[Curiositykilledcat7]

That’s making me turned on

[RavVid]

Oh. So all the men I know that have found and married a woman overseas are just figments of my imagination. I must stop talking to them then. Plus the guys here that are expats..

Despite what western women might like to think Thai, Viet, Fillipina girls are not keen to get to a western country. They prefer to be close to their family and like the lifestyle of their country.

The Western guys aren't that keen to go back to their western country either. It is cheaper to live in the adopted country and it is a more relaxed lifestyle. Thanks to the internet you earn as much as you would in your home country.

It is a no-brainer to live in a low cost country and earn in a high income country. Most expats do form a relationship and marry a local girl. From what I have seen they make good wives.

[RavVid]

@Curiositykilledcat7 I am curious too. What aspect is turning you on? It is hard to tell at times what a reply is too cause they all seem to go to the bottom on GaG.

[getwiththepg]

Cause he has game. Him not telling you (which could be just you he’s screwing to 6 other girls on rotation) has you on here asking about it, making you go crazy, thus making you want him more. Macking 101 on display right here people!

[Asker]

OHHHH,, so manipulative/ control.
Thanks buddy. Now blocking him for life

[Curiositykilledcat7]

I love a fuck boy like that

[Vegasrunner]

That's an easy answer. If he is actually a HV man that has options then he has dealt w/ female behavior b4 and understands that women can't handle the truth. He's being smart because he knows he can keep you on the hook for a longer time by not answering your question.

[Asker]

So like, a manipulation type of thing

[Asker]

He’s not High Value. At least to me.
He’s African American.
I’m a white chick/ latina
I’m not reproducing with a black guy.
No offense 😬

[Vegasrunner]

@Asker I'm not sure if he's manipulating you or not, he's simply telling you what you want to hear for his best interest.

[Vegasrunner]

@Asker Its not relevant whether he's HV to your or not as a man's value never comes from a woman but from other men of value. What are his demographics, height, income, etc, we already know he has enough value to attract multiple women which is a trait of HV men right there.

[Asker]

He’s just hot/ attractive. Lives with his mother, black.

[Vegasrunner]

@Asker TY for sharing. Based on your response my original answer stands. Sounds like he's a HV guy that has had exprience w/ a lot of women. He understands that answering your question is a mistake because
1) Women make decisions based on emotion 2) He can keep u in the roster longer by ignoring you.
You claim "you don't care" yet u post this question on a forum to receive feedback from strangers, huge red flag, if you're incongruent here He probably has recognized incongruencys in you elsewhere.

[Asker]

Wow all women on earth need to block men who listen to male podcasts. That shit is dead.
😒

[Vegasrunner]

@asker That may not be a bad idea, because what happens is now more guys get exposed to female behavior, limiting to number of guys women can take advantage of.

[Asker]

Did you get taken advantage of?

[Vegasrunner]

@Asker Lol, TY for proving my point. You ask a question on a public forum searching only for answers that make you feel better. When u don't get the ones you want you then pretend it's somehow the responders issue. This is a standard female trait as women struggle w/ truth they don't like, which again is why the guy never answered your question. 10-15 years ago the only men who understood this were guys like me and the guy that was banging you and that's because we have been through so many women that we've seen this behavior numerous times. W/ the advancement of "male podcast" thos female behavior has been introduced exponentially to a new audience meaning more guys are being educated about this behavior.

[Asker]

Ok I’m not reading that load of shit

You said “ it’s better to limit the number of guys women can take advantage of.”

I’m saying “did you get taken advantage of b—ch” is it why you’re so pissed off and miserable?

Simple question deserves simple answer

[Asker]

If someone took advantage of you @vegasrunner
Then clearly you , sir
Are not HV, because HV males don’t get taken advantage of.

So you care about men not being taken advantage of, because clearly someone went and took advantage of you. PATHETIC.

[Vegasrunner]

@Asker The person who doesn't reaf has no advantage over the one who can't. Lol, you read half a question and cherry picked what made u feel better. You randomly brought up make podcast, I simply shared w/ you the benifit of your idea.

[Vegasrunner]

@Asker This is another great example of proving my point. You feel taken advantage of because you've been used for sex by a HV man. To make yourself feel better you've created a random narrative that has nothing to do w/ me and are attempting to pretend its true. It's this same delusion that has u searching for validation on an online form while attempting to shame the HV man that used you. The best part about your statement is at least you recognize that in fact HV men exists which is something many women will attempting to deny. The issue you have is like many women you have been unable to retain one. Do you need my advice on that as well?

[Curiositykilledcat7]

Works for me 🥵

[Avicenna]

A lot of people don't seem to understand that a friends with benefits has no accountability (which is why some people opt for it). It's not a relationship, it's just sex with someone who isn't a total stranger.

[Asker]

Ok so if the woman doesn’t matter. Why not just expose it. 🤷🏻‍♀️
He doesn’t care about her right?
So just expose it

[Avicenna]

Why is it so important for you to know?

[Avicenna]

If you're concerned about STDs, you should pursue monogamous relationships instead of having sex with a guy who obviously is having sex with other women as well.

[Asker]

Cause if he say 6 or 8. At least I know the man in dealing with. I know the risk I’m putting myself in

[Avicenna]

Honestly, it doesn't make much of a difference if it's 3, 8, or 10. Having sex with a person who is currently promiscuous is risky.

[Asker]

Ok but then what would be the reason for keeping such a secret anyway? Aren’t men proud to say their bodycount or their sidechicks? I thought they were proud

[Avicenna]

I think there are two reasons why he wouldn't. First, he knows it would anger you (otherwise you wouldn't be asking about it so insistently), second, he doesn't want to be answerable to you or any other woman on anything. If he did, he'd be in a relationship.

[LiamJHayden]

If he refuses there is nothing you can do other than cut him off or not. Just make sure you are taking precautions to protect your health.

[Asker]

Yeah thank you. I cut him off. It’s done.
I for sure will miss the action 😒😒

[Anonymous]

If you’re that concerned then find a new guy, he is probably trying to avoid a fight with you knowing you’ll get mad once you know because it’s human nature, I’m sure it’s not just you especially if he doesn’t feel like having sex sometimes at his age unless you’re doing it every day already. You already suspect it so it’s probably true

[Asker]

I won’t get mad lol. I barely meet up with him.

[Opinion Owner]

I’m betting he thinks you will because he doesn’t like drama that’s why he only does friends with benefits with women and doesn’t want to commit to any

[spartan55]

@asker
"I won't get mad" such a liar... you must think we are all stupid.

[Asker]

@spartan55
He’s done worse shit than tell me his side chicks number. And I haven’t got angry 😂
I really see him as a friend, I don’t give a fuck if he says 20 side chicks. I just want to know what I’m dealing with

[Opinion Owner]

Understandable, I guess let him know you won’t get mad

[Asker]

Thanks I’ll do exactly that. Thanks for answering the overall question without any biases or misogyny 👍

[spartan55]

Misogyny... another who doesn't what it means...🙄

[Opinion Owner]

I keep an open mind

[Screenwriter]

You're dealing with a man who doesn't want you to know his personal business. "I see him as a friend." I don't think he sees you that way. He sees you as one of his several sex partners who he has because he isn't in a committed, single relationship and who he doesn't need to have such discussions with.

Since you are in a friends with benefits relationship, this is the risk you take. You knew what you were getting into when you made this bargain. His personal business is not yours and he is under no obligation to tell you anything about who else he has sex with.

FWBs are not "friends." They're sex partners and that's it. That's what you're dealing with. Good luck.

[Daniela1982]

Why? Are you the only friend he is allowed to have? Frankly, who he screws is none of your business. You are in a no strings casual relationship for sex. If you need his whole life story, then maybe you are looking for more than a friend? 🤔

[DarkWinterNights]

He doesn’t really owe you an explanation, that’s part of the terms of a friends with benefits/NSA type situation. He claims you’re the only one, so unless he’s lying he’s not exposing you to possible STDs.

[AviatorTom]

He's maintaining his privacy.

If he is your friends with benefits, you should assume he is friends with benefits with other women as well. Is a number really that important?

[Asker]

Well yes. 3 other side women. Is less disgusting than 20.
Yes grandma m—ron

[spartan55]

He doesn't have to tell you shit... and it drives you crazy... fwbs are great aren't they?

[KrakenAttackin]

@spartan55 Exactly right. He owes her nothing but the occasional creamie pie.

[spartan55]

@KrakenAttackin
The gift that keeps on giving... 😂

[KrakenAttackin]

@spartan55. Yessir. I have no sympathy for women who have fuck buddy's. I good man is so easy to find and yet three women still seek Chad side cock.

[Asker]

@KrakenAttackin
Telling me you’re jealous of Chad and can’t compete at all. Without telling me. 🫵

[Asker]

Tell me you’re jealous of Chad and can’t compete at all. Without telling me. 🫵

[KrakenAttackin]

Asker... Great reverse psychology. Why don't you call my mother a bad name.

No, I am not jealous of Chad. Chad is just doing what Chad does, like a lion eating Impala's. What boils my blood is how women like you later abuse men who will actually commit to you. You will eventually marry some simp (his fault) and rape him financially and emotionally, because you are too damaged from Chads cock.

[Asker]

@KrakenAttackin
I don’t understand damaged. You mean like “hurt” “wounded”. What?
Grow Up!
You’re like 40+

[spartan55]

@asker
You can have Chad, but when you gripe about how he treats you then you can only blame yourself.

[Asker]

I HIGHLY HIGHLY doubt you care about some simp I will or won’t be with in the future.

Men compete against eachother naturally.
You’re pissed that these Chads are clearing through all the women and you aren’t. And weren’t in your youth.

I’m not stupid, I’m an adult. All adults can tell these terms of “damaged” is cope for the unselect. Those Left out.

The vagina doesn’t become damaged. It reverts back to normal, after any sexual encounter with any male.
It’s an elastic muscles like the tongue.
Does your mouth become damaged from eating tons of food through your life?
Exactly learn Biology. They teach it for free on YouTube. Just like in YouTube they have misogynist podcasts that are cope for men like you who were not picked. They also teach free biology. And female anatomy.

If there is not enough lubrication. Then yes you can cause “damage” but doctors call it; “injury” to the vagina, if you have a good sized penis that is. Or a large sized penis.

You feeling like women are “damaged” or “used” comes from your own ego and incompetence. Probably from your belief and subscription to religion as well.

Religion is simply a belief and I don’t have to be religious like you are. You want to believe in Santa that’s fine. Just don’t try and push that on everyone else.

I said my bodycount is 2 men at the age of 25. I lost my virginity at 22. Way later that everyone else. But if you. 44 old crust rotting man. Who wasn’t picked in his youth wants to think I’m DAMAGED. Do it.

[spartan55]

I love how pink anon acts like she knows all the guys here and their sexual histories. In other words, just making shit up. We are not making anything up, just going by what YOU said. You have zero support on your demand to know his sexual business. Wonder why that is?

[KrakenAttackin]

@asker... Wow, how about triggered as fuck.

[KrakenAttackin]

@spartan55. Asker is another creature who will soon evolve into the most destructive force known to society ---- a single mother. She will release Chads spawn into the world to become whores and criminals, rinse, repeat.

[Curiositykilledcat7]

@KrakenAttackin fuck yes a dirty dick is hot

[Asker]

@KrakenAttackin
Are you the product of a single mother.

[Alwayreckles93]

The news is he is a WOMANIZER! And you wete messing around HE IS NOT YOUR HUSBAND! He is not obligated to do so the two off you arelost in the World. Don't expect much.

[Anonymous]

I guess he likes the relationship he has with you and doesn’t want you to feel a certain way? But any who I would go get tested just in l case

[Asker]

Yes I’m getting tested and this is over. I ever consider this dynamic ever again. They gotta tell me the amount of females they fuck

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah that’s messed up there should still be some kind of commitment so at least the other person isn’t at risk of anything

[laly520]

why would u ever want to know
u r only a mere friends with benefits to him n so is he to u
he doesn't have to answer u

[Asker]

Wouldn’t you want to know for your health?

[laly520]

one who really cares about health won't really go to any friends with benefits
they aren't the safest option out there
u never know with whom they sleep or how many
not to scare u but thats how lot of women gets AIDS n STD

[laly520]

get a blood test n once u make sure u r healthy try to cut ties with friends with benefits bs
seriously

[Asker]

But you’re acting like Husband or Boyfriend wouldn’t cheat and cause the same thought.
friends with benefits at least you know they’re cheating

[laly520]

they would cheat if u date trashy ones
also friends with benefits tend to sleep more with others n have multiple hookups
usually when boyfriend or husband cheat he would go for one

[Asker]

They go for one?
ARE YOU STUPID?

[laly520]

u r the stupid one here bud
also do better n treat urself with more respect

[elizamichale1]

Well if he is only friends with benefits he doesn't really need to tell u tht honey...

[Asker]

Well as someone who cares about their friends health. He would honey…

[elizamichale1]

No.. if he is ok n healthy himself he doesn't really need to...

[Anonymous]

Because you're F-W-B duh. He doesn't owe you that. If you don't like it find a new friends with benefits.

[Asker]

What is the man’s side chick count like an utilmate secret or something. I don’t care
What’s the disadvantage?
I don’t understand?
So he thinks of me as a side chick right. Ok fine. He doesn’t care about me and I accept it.
What’s so hard to inform me of his other women

[jahaims]

Almost like he doesn't respect you and only uses you for sex or something.

[Curiositykilledcat7]

Perfect for me

[Pterodon]

You’re nothing but a fuck buddy. It’s none of your business

[LordMadara]

You are too young to get my attention