On a scale of 1 to 10, how big an idiot am i? Lol but seriously, I need outside perspective on if there is anything there?

[Anonymous]

So my best friend is a guy. We have been through a lot for each other and known each other for years and have a strong emotional connection. Things have gotten flirtatious but never crossed into sex. I have a strict no dating rule cuz I have trust issues and it's not fair bringing that into a relationship until I fix myself. I just don't know how. My friend is a well known player. He swore he left it behind and it seemed so during his last marriage, she left for another guy. After that we really bonded more and got pretty close. He kissed me when he was drunk then ran away, and I figured it was all alcohol and he didn't remember. He will act interested, then not. The subject of dating comes up sometimes. He tells me that he wouldn't let some guy hurt me if I wanted to date and he could screen them, so that seems to say not interested. He also has said he wants to adopt my kid and talks about the future with us in it, which seems like he is. He is very protective of us both. He seems to want to help with anything and everything. Always trying to spend money on us, then i feel guilty. He says how much he loves and cares for us. And it is def mutual. But just when I think maybe there is something there and I should just go for it, he recently changed status on Facebook to in a relationship. The cover photo is now a girl. Part of me was hurt he didn't tell me he was seeing someone, but part of me thinks it's none of my business bc i told him i didn't want to date anyone. But recently we were hanging out and he kept making comments of if he ever gets back to dating or on being single. So lies basically. I didn't let on i knew. I can honestly say I don't believe he would do anything with the intention of hurting me, but lies hurt. So I am divided again. Call him out or wait for him to be comfortable to tell me on his own? He means the world to me and I want him to live his life and be happy, but at the same time I don't want to be hurt. Why wouldn't he tell me the truth?

[ohsheeT]

I have some really good friends and they are girls.

In the very beginning it starts out someplace and it was usually me pursuing them

And there would always be some flirting
. And a very beautiful energy between us.
. But there becomes a moment in time and you get that choice

If you start dating each other and it doesn't work out that friendship usually ends

. Or you can remain friends and be friends forever but you can't have both in a roundabout way because somebody's always going to want something more.

Each person is different but you know down in your heart if it would work or if it wouldn't work if you're 100% honest with yourself and that's what you have to be so does that other person it sounds like you value your friendship where he kind of sounds like he still wants to get his dick wet thinking that if that happened you would remain friends if it didn't work out it could be true but you never do know I would say just be honest with yourself but he has to be honest with himself too

[In_Trance]

10/10