My boyfriend left his job 8 months ago and is trading oil full time while he starts up his own business. Its just not going his way and he says he is losing tons of money because of it. He says he needs to watch it 24/7 in order to not miss positions. I have come to terms that his time is going to be limited for me and his family. I entered a singing competition and made it to finals, I had been looking forward to the finals for weeks as i needed the winning cash. He said he would be there with me to watch me. Last night he came and sat there, didn't talk to me or ask me anything, the only thing he would say was "you didn't practice enough" " I told you the song i picked for you would have been better". It made me not want to sing but i thought let me just sing the first song. He sat trading oil all night, watched me when i sang but didn't comment or show much interest. I told him that tonight was a big night for me and i needed his support and he wasn't interested or looked like he wanted to even be there. He got upset and said "I am here arnt I? I just lost a lot of money on the oil today and in a bad mood". I decided to quit the competition and walked out in tears.
I support him in all his decisions even if i know its bad, I give him space he needs to work and try and make his life easier i just wanted him to be my support for one night.
Now I need to know, was i in the wrong for wanting his attention through my competitions while he has the stress of trading?
1 mo
Guys, For the guys who trade, its destroying my relationship, help me understand please?
What Guys Said
Dang, that sucks man. Trading can be a real stressful grind, but he still should've shown you more support.
I get why trading takes up so much brain space, but that competition meant a lot to you. One night to be there for your girl fully shouldn't be too much to ask, you know? Even if he was distracted, a little encouragement would've meant worlds.
I'd say talk to him when you're both chill and feeling heard. Tell him straight how you felt, but also listen to his side on trading stress. Maybe find a compromise - sometimes he commits fully to you, other times you let him be in trader mode.
Supporting each other is key, but you both need an outlet too. Maybe you could try getting into trading a little as well, so you understand his world better too. You'd be killing it as a power couple!
Ultimately you guys will figure it out if you keep communicating openly. Don't forget why you work so well together through the hard times. You got this boo, just have each other's backs.