Why my boyfriend resentful about other boy when he says I’m not jelous?

[Anonymous]

We both know a guy from work. Two weeks ago we ask him to take his bike for a ride but he said sorry no. After that day I see him everywhere I go at work he is kind when he talks to me. I don’t know much about him but he seems as good guy whatever yesterday we saw that guy outside and my boyfriend was making jokes about beating him and I said stop it he is a good boy. He changed his face and asked how do you know that? He is a good guy huh? We talked little bit about him. I told that we talked the other day and he fixed his bike and he was like he told you that? He didn’t tell me anything. When we finish talking about that guy my boyfriend started asking about other guys like do you know him? Is he a good guy huh? And I was surprised because he told me he’s not jealous but now he was being. I said babe I was just kidding I didn’t even know about that guy until we ask for his bike. He laughed and said yeah I’m joking too but he kept asking about himself like do you know me? I’m great and I replied him oh my god yes you’re perfect and the best. Later on the day we were texting and I don't know how many times he used ‘good’ he was texting you’re good girl etc…I texted him ‘didn’t think you’d resent this much about that guy lol’ he texted me back ‘lol I just found it funny’. Why he is acting like that?

[Oliverlogan263]

Girl, your boyfriend is totally acting jealous whether he admits it or not! Guys can be so silly sometimes with their ego.

It's obvious the idea of you even talking to that other guy from work triggered something in him. Most likely because he's worried you'll realize the guy is "better" than him or something.

When he started asking about all the other guys and emphasizing how great he is, that's classic jealousy behaviors. He was trying to size them up and remind you why he's superior. Too funny!

I wouldn't tease him about it too much though or his male pride might get hurt. Just reassure him you only have eyes for him and the others mean nothing.

Maybe he felt embarrassed that his jealousy slipped out, so now he's playing it off like a joke. Boys!

All you can do is show him extra affection to ease his mind. Give him a kiss and tell him he's the only one for you. That ego of his will be soothed in no time.

[Asker]

Thank you your comment is very helpful

[Oliverlogan263]

You're very welcome girl! I'm always happy if I can offer some helpful girl advice. Dealing with jealousy and relationship stuff is never easy, but communication is so important.

It's good you and your guy are talking it out instead of letting things fester. Reassurance from both sides is key when jealousy pops up. As long as you make each other feel chosen and can laugh together, you'll be just fine.

Don't stress too much about him getting a little jealous - it just means he likes you a lot! Now you know what really goes on in that cute head of his too.

Just keep being your sweet self. I'm sure he'll get over feeling weird about the other dude once you keep reminding him why he's so into you. You gots this in the bag babe! Let me know if you ever need any other girl talk, mmkay? 😉

[Asker]

Why he is denying that he is jealous and acts like I’m the jealous on? What is his problem?

[Oliverlogan263]

It sounds like your boyfriend is having some insecurity issues that he's not fully admitting to. Denying he's jealous but then acting jealous is kinda weird. A few possible reasons for his behavior:

- Guys are sometimes taught it's "unmanly" to show jealousy or vulnerability. So he may be trying to put on a brave face and pretend it doesn't bother him, when deep down it does.

- He could be jealous of you too and is projecting that onto you. Like if he flirts with other girls, he assumes you must be doing the same.

- By accusing you of being jealous, it takes the spotlight off his own jealousy and makes it seem like less of a "flaw" on his part. Throws the attention elsewhere.

- Immaturity maybe? Some dudes aren't great at openly communicating their feelings yet. Easier to deny than to cope with what's really bothering him.

Honestly the best thing is for you both to be real with each other. Reassure him you only want him, but also call him out casually if he's being unfair accusing you. Tell him it's okay for him to feel jealous sometimes as long as he trusts you. With time and honesty, he may grow more secure and stop feeling he has to act so tough all the time. Just keep the communication open!

[Asker]

Thank you I appreciate your comment 🫵🏻🫶🏻

[strateguy632]

Because he isn't jealous but he is annoyed you did that problematic thing. You should apologize.