Can a guy be with a girlfriend and develop strong feelings for another girl?

[Anonymous]

Can he?

[MrOracle]

Yes, of course.

That said, there are two important factors that play a huge role in whether or not this is likely to happen.

1. Does the guy have strong morals and values? What are they? Can he create boundaries for himself and enforce them?

The answer is going to vary from man to man, and, generally, the more universally attractive the man is to women, the worse his morals are likely to be. The real problem is that most women do ZERO vetting of a man's morals and values before they commit to him, and sometimes they already know by his past that he has low morals and values, but they get with him anyway because he's attractive. If you never vetted your man before committing to him, or worse, if you know he would fail your vetting but you get into a relationship with him anyway, you literally have ONLY yourself to blame if he cheats, because he was already a cheater or a likely cheater when you met - he never deceived you.

2. Is the girl meeting the man's needs?

While a man cheating because his needs aren't being met isn't morally defensible (he is fully justified to break up with her, but not to cheat on her), in the real world, it's one of the most common reasons that cheating happens.

Note that by "his needs", I don't just mean sex, though often it means exactly that. Still, a woman could be fully satisfying him sexually, but outside of the bedroom, she is cold, or doesn't show him appreciation or respect. Those are needs that he needs to have met.

If you have a man who has strong morals and values, and he is getting his needs met in the relationship, that guy is almost never going to cheat. He will create boundaries and will enforce them, leaving no room to develop feelings for anyone else.

But, if you chose a man with low morals and values - or even a known cheater - then the likely outcome was always there from the beginning. And even if you choose a quality man with good morals and values, if you aren't meeting his needs, whatever they are (if you don't know what his needs are, ask him and he'll tell you), then he will end the relationship or, if his morals aren't quite as strong, may cheat on you.

[Noredcarpet]

I'm afraid it can. But you know, it depend on the guy. A guy with strong boundaries see it coming and put his foot down.

I'm in this weird situation now as my partner has found a connection with some other female and support her in her mental health, or so it has been explained. I fear their connection because I know for one thing he has way too much empathy (like myself) and he claims in our past he did not know another female friend had feelings for him, til proven, I knew before.

In my past my dad went mentally ill, during he cheated on my mom with someone safe to say too had something mentally wrong with her. I suppose they find a strong connection. Since I learned my partner suffered mentally, took a strain not just on himself but on me, us, in the back of my head I have feared if his clarity vision will be blurred and he will invite the wrong people in our lives. I have been afraid he will identify himself too much with the illness instead of going back to normal. It is as if way before this friendship of his with her I've felt this coming and now it's here.

I have done what you are suppose to do, told him how I feel about it. We have tried to do all this work to get closer and start a new chapter. We have arranged for things to get us closer, things I have looked forward of us doing. Now they don't feel the same as I know this rather new female friend of his is somehow still in his life. To me it is almost as if everything I look at, everything we do is fake. He denies what I have told him which is that their connection scares and hurt me and make me unhappy because I can tell he is way too involved with her. In fear of sounding selfish, he should focus on his own well being and our new life together. She was not part of the plan.

I suppose I have been trying to grasp if he at first had cheated, then understood no, but still me trying to prevent what I can tell could become something like that.

In my past with exes I never once had this bad feeling with them, they too had friendships with females, it was how they handled them, and me, that just never made that into an issue, and lets not forget how these women friends handled me.

I hold it against my partner that he should have known better knowing my past with my dad cheating when mentally ill, and our own past when he insisted a female friend had no feelings for him when I knew that was not the truth. She was playing him, me. I'm just dog tired at this point.

[Screenwriter]

I'd expect it could occur if the relationship isn't satisfactory for him or has run its course. I'd say the same for a woman.

If that IS the case, sounds like the woman needs to let this guy go unless she and he want some kind of three-way relationship. Good luck.

[Summeroflove]

Well unfortunately this happens all the time. Someone whose loyal will fight the feelings and will eventually just leave a relationship. Someone whose loyal would never act upon feelings in a committed relationship.

But it happens…. Especially in low points of relationships. There are narcissists who cannot make genuine connections but that’s another story. Maybe people aren’t in relationship for love… Some people are in relationships that maybe they used to be in love but they invested so much into the relationship… they can’t let go.

There are people in relationships for the sake of being in a relationship. The second option… Maybe for social status or financial reasons. Maybe it’s because she’s the type of woman his family wants him to marry but isn’t who he really wants. It’s horrible to do someone that way and make someone think you love them.

But these people…. Commonly lust after others and are rarely loyal. Dishonest usually means people are disloyal.

[coachTanthony]

Yes but that is where character comes in at... you need to control those and know you have them for someone you love and care about. Don't need to act on every electrical signal that comes your way.

[ohsheeT]

You know, one of the best things about being in a relationship is the scenario that you just described it happens. But the best part about being in a relationship is when a guy, alright, we'll see myself when I know I can go do something, but I choose not to because of what that relationship means to me that I'm in the moment. That's what makes the relationship even better and stronger. And it goes the same way for girls too. They have the same type of opportunities. But when they are committed and they are self-disciplined and they want what they want, and they know it's for the best elephant for some reason, if it's not for the best for both parties, then break up before you act upon that other Thought that other person

[Zack-Bann]

The title of boyfriend is something we humans made up
It’s not magic


The heart will want what it wants


Now if your relationship is healthy and fulfilling chances are he will be too comfortable to even consider stepping out


That’s what loyal people usually do.


But if he’s constantly stressed and unhappy and somehow finds that happiness while having a coffee with some girl he’s buddies with, he might catch feelings


And so would you.

[Seangreen]

Yes, but he can't honestly say he loves his girlfriend.

[Asker]

You think that’s true? He can’t love her if he catches feelings for another girl? What about if he tries to shut it down? After a long time though.

[DryGermanGuy]

Anything and everything that is possible under the sun, happens. It’s one of the rarer things on the bell curve, though.

[Finchie40]

Unfortunately yes , it just means he doesn’t have strong feelings for his current girlfriend , something is lacking in the relationship, for him to be open to another girl , the other girl might be more attractive to him and she treats him better.

[Miristheiss]

Not if he is keeping good boundaries. He wouldn't be spending that much alone time, quality time with another woman.

Usually ALL of these inappropriate relationships start with BAD boundaries.

[live2dance25]

Absolutely. But he is the one that chooses to do something about it, or not. Men do it all the time even though it’s not right.

[Nikki1989]

For better or worse, it happens all the time.

[DishLady]

If he's a creep, sure. Don't declare girlfriend or anything permanent if you're just doing it to keep a cal on the hook while you go galavanting with other women.

[RavVid]

Of course. If a guy isn't being treated right by his girlfriend then he will notice and desire girls that he thinks has those qualities he thinks his girlfriend lacks.

[MikeMcMansion]

Of course, he’s an immature wish washy indecisive fool, or sociopath. There’s tons of them in both sexes.

[Alex-Snow]

Yes... it is not right but I bet it happens. Has this happened to you? Was it because of sex or something else?

[sportsbraslikes]

Yep.


I had very strong feelings about someone and one of my friends married her then 11 years later I married her sister

[Sexiestjohnson]

From experience I think it is possible. But it has a greater possiblity of happening when you just randomly date instead of dating intentionally.

[elizamichale1]

isn't that exactly the reason the relationship start to fall apart

[Anonymous]

I'm sure it happens to both genders. I've caught feelings for a girl I wasn't dating, but I wasn't involved with anyone at the time.

[MisterPandemonium]

Yes, obviously.

Are you worried that your boyfriend is developing feelings for someone else?

We need more details.

[AviatorTom]

Anything is possible in a relationship. This can happen for girls too.

[Static_In_The_Attic]

Absofuckinglutely!

[Brady]

Yes n dependin on the girls it may or may not b OK.

[MrChinaski]

Can you have two children and love them both? Same.

[Angelbabylips]

I think it depends on the relationship and guy.

[Shiprex]

Perhaps if the girlfriend isn't the full package

[snermcger]

Absolutely. I dated a girl years ago but was so smitten with her roommate. She was so fine. Nothing ever came of it but it can happen.

[beefcakebradybatson]

Yep. He's a boy and likely always on the brand.

[Twalli]

Yes, but you shouldn't. You can keep it platonic if you want to.

[WonderingManII]

Yes of course! In fact in old Bible times, some men even married multiple Women!

[Anonymous]

Thats literally what men do, they’re in a relationship with a woman just to leave her for someone new, its called cheating, basic thing the male gender does.

[Jamie05rhs]

Not unless his girlfriend stops loving him.

(Or unless he's a douchebag.)

[NerdGuy89]

Yes, if she isn’t doing her fair share and he feels neglected.

[Anonymous]

You really don't understand men if you ask this question! LMAO

[EmmaMary]

Unfortunately all too often.

[Raydergman26]

It can be a good thing the you can have a threesome or a bad thing

[WhitneySnow]

Absolutely. And girls can do it too.

[molonski2]

Absolutely he can happens regularly for sure.

[exitseven]

Sure, it happens all the time

[CupcakeTheDestroyer]

Yes, this happens frequently

[Curmudgeon]

Yes, but it is foolish to act upon them.

[lilBigPotato]

It can happen to anyone

[blackeagle007]

Anyone, any gender can.

[BigBang1001]

Happens all the time! 😀

[Babygirlwashere96]

It is a yes and no

[wkhan_87]

It's depends on guy's vileness level.

[Anonymous]

He’s doesn’t love his girlfriend

[AngryCarl2]

It's definitely possible.

[Purpleronnie]

Yes , so can a woman

[Twodogs0525]

Yes.

[ABC1x1x]

Of course. he's dating, not dead

[Anonymous]

Some guys maybe can, but I can't.

[Jmmmfi4]

I really don't know

[Clyde_123]

Yes.

[In_Trance]

Of course

[Anonymous]

😆😆😆

[jahaims]

Nope

[Anonymous]

Probably

[Anonymous]

Yes.

[Anonymous]

Sure