How do guys feel about being chased by a girl?

[Sassafras]

Okay, so this question is probably especially focused towards shy guys.

I get quite a bit of attention from guys and am used to being pursued, but recently I met a nice, shy guy that I totally clicked with and feel like there's a lot of romantic potential with. However, because he outright admitted he was shy, I had to make the first move and ask him out on a date - something that was new for me.

He said he was so relieved because he was interested in me but was afraid of rejection. We've gone out a couple times now, and while I really do like him, I find that I have to do a lot of initiating with contacting, setting dates, and physical intimacy despite the fact that he claims he's interested in me.

My problem is, while I understand he's shy, I'm afraid that if I'm the one chasing him he's going to lose interest or something. I've noticed that he does a lot of ping-ponging, like giving me a lot of attention, then pulling away for a bit, then slowly taking a step forward, then backing up again. It's so frustrating! I'm trying to move slowly, but at the same time it's like I have to be the hunter instead of him. And I've already told him if my interest isn't reciprocated, tell me up front, so I can move on. But he tells me he's interested.

So how do guys honestly feel about being chased by a girl? Is it a turn-off? Is it normal for them to pull away and come back again this way? And when it comes to those shy, nice guys who seem so much harder to get to know, is it better to back off and give them their space until they come to your or is it better to show interest and be persistent without being forceful/demanding?

[good-looking-geek]

When I lived in the university dorms a few years ago, I had one girl show an obvious interest in me who lived on my floor. But I gave her no attention and I practically ignored her. I ignored her because I was not attracted to her and I knew that I would not get along with her in a relationship. So I did things (or should I say I did nothing) to deliberately make her lose interest. I didn't pursue her or give her any hints that indicated attraction. She got the point after a little time.

So if I was chased by a girl that I was interested in, then I would show my affection and make it very obvious that I like her. But if a guy is genuinely interested in a girl he should be delighted when he sees her or talks to her. If a guy "needs space," I think that is just BS.

Some guys deliberately move forward then step away as your guy has done, because it's actually a rule of being a pick up artist. Ask him if he has heard of the names, "Mystery," "Neil Strauss," or "David Deangelo?" Those men are authors and he might have read some of their online books (or talked about them with another guy). I disagree with moving forward then pulling away because I know it just makes a girl angry and confused. I actually disagree with many things those authors teach.

[WeaponZero]

trust me don't worry about him losing interest. its not something that is a turnoff in any way when the girl initiates things, in fact its nice to know sometimes that she wants it enough to do that. when it comes to shy guys, just be persistent if you know he likes you. nothing bad will come of it.

[sexxyrosey]

You sound more like his employee then a girlfriend.Your guy really suck and sounds extremely boring,he's not even a challenge and I fear that the sex will be lame to especially if you have to do all the work in that area aswell...shy na he might be gay!

[Anonymous]

Don't swap the roles.

Let him chase you so that in the end he feels that he as earned you.

If he is shy try communicating non-verbally so that he gets the hint but don't ever do his part !

[vanessa9]

he likes you , but he's got issues...and honestly, he could very well be more trouble than he's worth. you can do better probably.

i wish you the best!

[Adidas12]

Well there are two kinds of guys. The nice ones and the jerks. Americans and their stereotypes. Oh well. The nice guys usually enjoy being chased a little bit, some more than others, but the jerks will tell you its obnoxiuos to have girls flying at them. This guy might think you don't like him anymore if you try to pull away from him. If you do, just tell him that you would rather give him his space until he's ready for you, or else he will think you hate him or don't like him or something. Any more questions, feel free to ask.

[jbone79]

Does the girl chasing me have a firearm? Or is she hopped up on meds and batshit crazy trying to convince me that toothpaste should be sold by the gallon. What's the score here. I don't like anyone chasing me. Cop's, pitbull's, that little midget from different strokes. I don't care who it is. And if a woman chasing me catches me, are we on foot after a long car chase or is it just one of those shoot me in the leg to slow me down so she can get out the helicopter kind of deals where I rigged her purse with C-4 and I'm keeping the money from the bank job. JESUS CHRIST WHERE'S THE VAN! - J

[iamranga]

Great answer

[Anonymous]

I wish I could hear about a girl kept chasing after a guy, but he didn't warm up to her, not because he like her and afraid of rejection, but because he didn't think she was his type at first but later own he changed his mind about her so later own both him and her became a couple

[martyfellow]

Frenchwomen and Japanese women do this and it's great. I wish it happened more often here in the USA. Only the really good women do this. So right away you know you are in luck and it's 'safe.'

Excludiing the amateur hooker club, of course.

[bigboi2010]

its not a turnoff or anything. I would like a girl to take charge once in a while, its nice to know for sure your not the only one who wants to be together

[acealmighty13]

Being chased is a change of pace. Being the shy guy as well it helps me out. It's a boost in confidence.

[Anonymous]

chasing a guy has never had a posiive out come for me. either, the guy is entirely turned off, or I end up as the second option on any given night because they feel like I'm always avaiable to them where as some other girls may not be.

[Anonymous]

I love being chased by a girl. But some guys don't like that, guess its all a matter of opinion.