The responses to this question truly suprise me. Not one person thought it was okay to broach the weight topic. I'm here to disagree, even if I take a lot of flak for it.
Here goes.
I've had a number of jobs over the years, one of them happened to be a sales counselor at a health club. When I say I have an EXTREMELY strong sensitivity to how girls feel about their weight, it is backed up by the 14 hour shifts I would sometimes work trying to convince and inspire girls (and guys) to lose weight and make their lives healthy once more.
Society places an unfathomable amount of pressure on girls to look "perfect". It is completely understandable for women to shy away from the topic and even more so when the girl hears it from a man she has feelings for. That being said, any man that has the slightest idea as to unhealthy carrying around extra pounds is, if he remains silent, he is doing a girl no favors!
Pause for a moment. How a man addresses the issue of weight makes all the difference in the world.
A girl who is overweight is fully aware of her problem. Heck, even some girls who are the correct weight think they weigh too much! That being said, many, if not most girls WILL NOT TAKE ACTION TO CHANGE WITHOUT THE HELP AND SUPPORT OF ANOTHER INDIVIDUAL. While that help and support may come in the form of another woman, there's no law saying a caring man can't help a woman change for the better.
If a man really loves a woman, he's going to try to do everything in his power to improve her overall wellbeing. A mature man is not afraid to say what needs to be said. Overweight people (which includes girls) are by and large, emotionally insecure and often unstable. The degree of severity increase with those who are obese.
A girl should first and foremost want to lose the weight for her own personal improvement. That being said, if she feels that there is no support (or even motivation) to change, she'll remain overweight.
Turn the situation around for a moment.
If you had a boyfriend who did drunks, drank excessively, never got any sleep or was deeply troubled by some from of self-inflicted abuse, can you honestly call yourself a caring girlfriend or wife by ignoring the problem? Ladies, you know you'd help your man out! Don't even pretend that you could just sit there in silence! When people need, they often can't do it without the moral support and guidance of others.
A caring man will also make careful distinctions about when and how to approach the subject. The goal should always be to get her to the fullest and happiest life she can possibly live, and not because he doesn't like her fat, but because he genuinely cares about her health. If a girl is 20 or more lbs overweight, that's a serious problem. If she put on two pounds over Christmas, don't freak out. If she just gave birth, chill.
Knowing when AND HOW to talk about the subject is key.
Any loving man wants all the women in his life (including friends and family) to be healthy.
Depends. Remember, we are our own worst critics. In his eyes, you might actually be perfect. But to you, you feel like you need to lose weight. If he tells you that you're fine, then you're fine. Leave it as is and move on.
thats something you should do for yourself girl. well, in my case, I feel the same way. I mean I weigh like 145 but my hubby always checks out girls that are skinny and look pretty somewhat. I use to jog a lot and weigh a bit less than 130. I always ask him and he says I look perfect to him too. but I know he doesn't want to hurt my feelings. but do it for yourself. he'd be an asshole if he said you needed to lose weight. cus you love someone for who they are, not by what they look.
How would you really feel if he actually thought that and said so? Relief that he can be so honest?
If he tells you what you think he might be thinking then he's being an insensitive asshole. If he reassures you that you're fine then he's lying. Poor guy can't win for trying.
Why bother asking him? If you think you need to lose weight, then lose weight.
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4Opinion
A nice guy would never tell a girl she needs to lose weight even if he thought she was morbidly obese...lol! Ask one of your girl friends, if yall have a really good relationship she will be honest with you.
I don't think I could ever tell a girl if I thought she needed to lose weight. So he could feel either way - pay attention to his tone to know if he means what he said.
I would never tell my girlfriend she needed to loose weight! no waaaaaaaaaaay jose`! if you think that then why go out wiht them in the first place.
Only an jackass would ever tell a girl he cares about she needs to loose weight. That's just rude. If you want to lose weight, do it for yourself and your health and all that good stuff, I'm sure he won't like you any less because of it
Hell no lol
A smart guy who truly loves his girl would never say sum stuff like that.
guys should never tell a girl that tey should loose weight!
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