I don’t have anything else lol I’m just wondering. I do not often hear people my age discuss marriage, so when they do i am surprised and I’m curious in general what it means to people. My childhood and I to young adulthood was all the F over the place and surviving was my main objective. Dating, let alone relationships, even still marriage— was not something that entered into my thoughts.
I wanted girlfriends all my life. I really loved those kind of committed, infatuated relationships.
I didn't start thinking about finding a life partner and settling down for good until I was in my early to mid 30s. By then, I had a good job and some assets. I had been free to explore life, have a hell of a lot of fun, learn a lot, and gain some wisdom through experience. I finally thought I was mature enough to make a good husband. I was ready to start a new chapter.
The thing is, I considered marriage to be a once in a lifetime thing; the most important decision I would ever make. I didn't consider divorce to be an option. So I tried to be careful before jumping into it.
I found a woman who was very pretty, bright, hard working, successful and independent. We shared common values and got along great. What was special about her was, we gradually came to trust each other completely. That was rather astounding. I never knew anyone whom I could trust like that. Also, she felt the same way about marriage as did I. She, too, had lived a full life and was ready to settle down.
So we went steady for two years in order to insure that no major conflicts arose. We even went to couples counseling (at her suggestion) to learn more about ourselves and each other. It was very illuminating.
Then we did the whole marriage thing. In fact, we got married twice. Once back east in a Catholic ceremony with her large family and old friends who put on a wonderful reception afterwards. Then we went on a three week honeymoon to New England in the fall. When we returned to California, we got married again (a month after the first time) so that my family and our friends could attend. This time, it was non-religious with a female, lay-minster friend. Our friends put on a great reception this time, too.
We've been best friends, household business partners, companions and lovers for the past 26 years. We've had lots of fun and have built a great life together. We count on each other and have each other's backs. And we work to keep our marriage happy and healthy because we made a solemn, lifelong commitment.
The second half of my adult life has been interesting. I had no way of imagining it when I was younger. I'm glad I waited to get married, but I couldn't be happier with the way things turned out. Somehow I got lucky.
Marriage to me is a commitment between you and Your partner and God , Marriage can be hard but it’s also amazing if you find someone that stands by you like you stand by them , Love grows when 2 people remove selfishness for each other and make each other a priority including God , if you can’t commit and remove selfishness and sacrifice for your partner and God then it’s just a piece of paper , Sadly in today’s world it’s hard to find someone that is capable of doing that , I feel social media has played a big part in sabotaging relationships , Partners do not fix things as much anymore , they go behind each other backs and think grass is greener on the other side , little do they realize they will experience the same thing with their back up plan and it will just become a vicious cycle, if you can’t prioritize your partner and fix what is broken and remove selfishness you should not be getting into a relationship or marriage what so ever. You should always wear each other’s shoes when it comes down to decision making and understand that you won’t always be right , Honor each other and Love will grow , the only way you should walk away is if you are being physically abused or cheated on. Everything else you fix it , Nobody is perfect
Yes, I want to marry. Though, if something happens or if something comes up and I can't marry, then I just won't get married.
Expectations of my partner... They have to be one of the reasonable humans who has common sense. We'll joke around with each other and just have fun. If they have things that need to be handled and prefer to do it alone, then I'll respect that, because I am the same way, though I'd want them to tell me about the things that needs to be handled. Because you cannot expect to get anywhere if you're not informing others or at least one person what you are working on, and then get stuck and need assistance or an opinion or two. Now, I'm not nosey, I just don't like the fact that when someone gets stuck on something and they don't call for help, how are they supposed to make progress?
Another thing I want in that marriage, is truth, trust, honesty and genuinely. Along with affection, love and support. All of that in physical and emotional sense. Then there's bond.
I'm married.
My expectations out of marriage was someone to go through life with that I could always be able to trust. Someone who wanted to have a traditional marriage, who is easy to get along with and had all the same ideas, values, and goals out of life that I did. A best friend whose presence I never got got tired of and who was a joy to be around.
I was blessed enough to find exactly that, and it's been fun. Definitely the best decision I ever made.
Opinion
31Opinion
What Does Marriage Mean To Me?
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(Why, thank you for asking! 🙂 )
This is what marriage means to me:
Sharing the journey of life with another person -- your partner.
Being faithfully committed to them. A permanent bond of loyalty. This is the person that you can depend on through thick or thin, who will never leave you or abandon you.
Having someone to talk to and share your thoughts and feelings with. Letting them inside your mind and soul, and sharing pure intimacy.
Supporting one another and always being there for each other. Never letting them feel alone.
Dreaming and plotting and scheming and planning together. Encouraging each other's goals. And even maybe collaborating on some projects together. :)
Sharing music, and making music together. Singing in harmony.
(Sorry; I just had to include this. I am a huge music person. Music is everything to me.)
Reading together, going to plays, and watching movies together.
Discussing philosophy. Discussing history. Discussing science. Expanding the mind.
Communing with nature. Caring for animals. Making friends with animals and spending time with them.
Having deep personal conversations, and sharing our feelings with one another.
Writing notes, cards, and love letters.
Dancing.
Cuddling.
Kissing.
[And potentially other stuff lol]
Growing old together.
Sharing with others and helping those in need. Mentoring young people.
Being involved in the community and participating in civic organizations. Speaking out on important local matters.
Traveling the world together. Seeing new places and exploring different cultures. Making positive connections and working towards understanding and peace.
And oh yeah- building a home together.
... Okay, that's all I've got. 😊
I didn't for a long time and avoided women and their advances. I had hangups from early life. Middle age I started exploring more, trying to meet and date because I became lonely and learned a lot and grew a lot... in the school of hard knocks and stupidity. I was Suma Cum Laude graduate. I met my wife some years ago (on GAG) and we got married this year.
It means we are committed to being there for each other and honoring and loving one another. It's going good, one day at a time. I missed my chance to have kids and many opportunities to do so over the years.
I do want it. I am saving myself for my wife. To me it means a partner, a confidant, someone who commits to be with you and give you everything no matter what. And you give the same to them. Someone who will be with you for your entire life, a better half.
My best friend
My younger years, I became the target of insane witch hunts. I also had a tendency to meet women that were highly unstable.
Now I live with family in a neighborhood of mostly retirees. Not too many women my age here that I'd even want to touch with a long pole, much less marry.
Getting married would feel like I "broke the curse." But I'm broke right now. Still one of the lucky ones. Just south of me, whole cities are now underwater due to Ian The town I was born in is now pretty much Atlantis.
I did. Not sure anymore. I think she'd have to really restore my faith in women again first. Because if she's not in it for the long haul and from what I've witnessed women aren't anymore then she can save us both the hassle and just go away now. .
I like the idea, but I don't think women who are "marriage material" have ever taken me seriously except one, because I have not taken building a future for myself seriously in their eyes. Seems like the only women attracted to me are crazy, drug addict, old, drunk lesbians, or female friends from the past who divorced some asshole that treated her bad. I have always had a job when I needed one and paid my own rent for the last 20 years, never been arrested, never been a drug addict, not mentally unstable, treated women with respect- But it's not enough for most women around here. I think I'm just in the wrong part of the world. Women don't want much to do with me until they need something, and I'm a professional at saving people's asses. I thought I still had some time to find a woman who actually gives a fuck, but I found out recently that I might have 20 less years to live. At least I don't have to save up for a retirement.
Usually when you're dating before you even decide marrying you look at what they want and discuss what you want together. It's a long courtship of discussions your likes and dislikes in both parties. Never try to change your companion he or she may not like that. It is a group companionship not a single rule but a duel companionship. You discuss how many children you want if you don't want any children even. Discuss how big a wedding. Who to invite to the wedding you can't hurt people's feelings.
Lastly good luck. Happy marriage and Hope your companionship of marriage last longer than mine of 40 years plus
in my opinion, marriage (removing the legal part) is just two people getting together for life and sharing everything in order to raise a family together. So basically just the parents dealing with life and dumb kids doing dumb kid stuff lol.
I don't think I understand what you mean by hopes/expectations, could you elaborate? 💜
THIS is such a loaded question, that would take me ages to answer. And my thumb hurts right now. I will try tomorrow 😂🥰
I'm married but I never really expected anything out of it besides having someone to love and who loves me back.
In general I'm not a huge fan of marriage since it's just a piece of paper. If it wasn't for my husband being in the military we probably would have just dated forever until old age then maybe gotten married for fun.
I would want to marry in the future, but first I'd need to get my own life in order. I'd hope for more of a traditional type of marriage, sharing money, food and chores with each other for life. I would hope most for a lady who is consistent, for a nice and peaceful relationship.
I don't believe in having sex until after marriage and expect the same from the girl.
When I date a woman my ultimate goal is to see if we're compatible for marriage. It's sad how marriage is discouraged nowadays whereas casual relationships/hookups are encouraged and viewed positively. I expect a partner that I can trust with my secrets, rely on when I am having bad days, and so on. I would do the same too.
honesty loyalty the understanding that hearts break and they break hard. don’t make the promise unless you can keep it
I’m not opposed to marriage per se. However, in the current state of marriage and divorce in the US, it’s purely a sucker’s bet for men. Since i’m no sucker, i won’t be marrying.
Settle down with a girl who can meet me half way an has a litvin comb with me
Richer or poorer but I want love, intimacy and companionship. Don't want to grow old alone, I want to grow old with a partner for life. I don't want to feel lonely, frustrated, depressed. I want to live happily ever after. I need a partner to love, kiss, hug, cuddle, cry, laugh and enjoy.
It doesn’t enter my mind, but who knows if I meet the right girl. She would have to like sex as much as I do.
Not necessarily, I would still say yes if the right person comes around and asks me but marriage was never important to me and still is not a goal I wanna reach in my life
Being married is to work together like couple to agree to be respectful too one another geting along with one another not to fight with one another to learn about one another to be married is to be nice to one another
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