Do you think and believe love between a husband and wife should be equal, or husband loves wife more or wife loves husband more and why?

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

[TenderFantasy]

Equal. Any imbalance will create resentment and of course an IMBALANCE in the relationship. It will be felt, maybe not today, not tomorrow, but definitely somewhere down the line. Someone will feel not good enough and there will be actual tangible evidence for it! Maybe not at first but deep inside they will feel it through the other person's subconscious actions.

In my 38 years of life, I have learned that people speak BOTH verbally AND non-verbally and I feel that the non-verbal sends more of a concrete message if that makes any sense. I feel that if you ask ANYONE whether they'd rather hear the words "I love you" from their partner or have them DISPLAY it, the majority will choose actions vs. words! I think it's because TALK IS CHEAP! ANYONE can say it and they can even look you in the eye and say it, especially if they are really good at lying, habitual liars, and or just really good actors/manipulators! It's the actions that carry more weight because they are usually the ones that bring more concrete results! Sure, I am not saying that words mean sh*t but like I said, when it comes down to it, the words AND actions preferably have to match because the actions are the ones that truly DISPLAY how one feels! .. And like I said, takes more EFFORT to execute!

[Qdbrown]

First off, the belief in equality is dumb. It doesn't exist in nature. It has never existed in human transactions. You can strive to try to keep it fair, but the 50-50 always is a dynamic ratio that floats around. Anyone who has been in a serious relationship knows this.

If you expect equality in the relationship, you will not be happy. There will be times you will be wondering why it all lands on you, or you will take it for granted when things get easier for you. It's a recipe for disaster.

This is where having good communication counts. Setting boundaries is smart. Working through issues is king, because no relationship is perfect, and above all a lot of work. When it slides to 60-40, even 70-30, knowing how to ask for help and not blow up is a skill not many peoplr want to mess with, and as a result find a lot of disappointment. They may even struggle and keep coming out of, and going into many relationships with the wrong outlook.

Your relationship is going to look like a boat on waving water. The boat is going to rock side-to-side, depending the weather. The trick is not to let the boat just constantly list to one side. That's when boundaries are being constantly broken and abused. And if you're worth your salt, you will know how to ask for help and keep it afloat. Not jump ship everytime the stormy seas set in.

[DaveJord]

Honestly you love someone or you don't... not sure if two people truly do love each other, that it is possible for one person to love the other more or less then the other. I mean how do you measure one's love, and determine who's is more or less?

One would think that they love each other period and that's enough for both of them. After that it comes down to love language, and if they make you feel loved and appreciated in return.

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

You do more, willing to sacrifice more.

[DaveJord]

I guess, I see your piont honestly. Somethings are just easier for other then some... so it requires less sacrifice. So it comes down to how much you appreciate the things they do for you, and they appreciate the things you do for them.

But if you're in a situation where your tallying up things, or keeping score as if everything is supposed to equal out 50/50 at the end of the day... then it is not supposed be that way either. And its not a matter of who thinks who loves each other more... love is intangible in a lot of ways.

It's never going to be equal, because people put greater and lesser values on things. So comes back to love language and if they do the things you value the most. It's not about who does more or less at any give time... are truly happy and satisfied or not? If not them it's not about someone doing more or less. It's about determining if you can find happiness with this person or better off with the next.

[Daniela1982]

According to the Bible:

This says that both should be equal in regards to love.

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

No. It doesn't teaches likewise wife love your husband as Christ loved the church and gave himself for it.

Quit posting silly images without the full context especially those water down corrupted versions.

[Daniela1982]

What you said and the meme said is the same, except for the end which someone paraphrased.

[coachTanthony]

You can be equal in the household and in life but no way to measure love mathmatically. Sure you can feel one or the other in a couple might show more love then the other but doesn't mean the love isn't there.

[Guy13]

Love is shared but responsibilities are weighted more towards the man.

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

So should be equal, husband loves wife more or wife loves husband more?

[Guy13]

Check out Ephesians 5.-Let God speak?

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

I know what it says. Christian husband are suppose to love their Christian wife more.

It's not equal.

[Guy13]

I think our misunderstanding is Agape and that is to be equal, however, the responsibilities than demonstrate that love is tilted towards the men. This is a reasonable conclusion. Proverbs, Ecclesiastes, and Song of Solomon make be good inquiry points for both concrete and nuisance in this subject area

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

What is agape?

[Summeroflove]

It should be pretty well equal

[lightbulb27]

I think the husband should love the wife and the wife respect the husband.

He should lead and she should respond.

sizes and proportions should be give and take and balanced. Start putting that into some formula and I think you get into trouble.

[_piotr]

I think it should be equal.

To address your Bible passage: "wife love your husband as Christ loved the church and gave himself for it. "

Remember that church also suffered and gave many lives for Christ. Martyrs for example.

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

No Christian can love Jesus as Jesus loves us. It's not even close to being equal.

[_piotr]

Then this is very bad news for men. This means 1) women have advantage, world is unjust and man should never merry or 2) the Bile is not true world of God.

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

This is a commandant to born Christian men towards the Christian wife.

God is the Most High and is orders ought to be followed or get thrown in the lake of fire.

The heathen men and women regarding their marriage, that's their problem.

[_piotr]

Or 3) Your interpretation of Bible is just wrong.

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

Notice it doesn't say wives ought to love their husband as Christ loved the Church (Christians) nor be willing to die for him.

It's for husbands to do that. The Bible is very clear on the matter.

Ephesians 5:25-33

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word, that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish.

So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself.

For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church.

For we are members of His body, of His flesh and of His bones.

“For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.”

This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church.

Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.

[_piotr]

Sorry, but this is unacceptable.

[_piotr]

Clearly bad world design.

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

No. God is right on every subject.

You can't presume as a little fragile human being that is is extremely limited intellectually, subject to illness and sudden death at any moment you know more than the Most High.

[letuswaltzforthedead]

In the case where love matters, I think it works when it is unequal and the man loves the woman more.

[thatssuppy190]

I think, for a healthy relationship, the woman should love the man at least the same or more. Because if a man loves the woman more she will know it and make use of him and manipulate him, also (before you call me misogynist) women are geberally more attracted to a man 2ho isn't so reliable and desperate for a girl. They want to feel wanted not needed

[Keishio]

How on earth do you measure it to know its equal. Asking isn't a good way since 99% of people who love their partner will just say yes to avoid some weird, awkward 'yeh but do you love me this much' conversation.

I suppose love could be measured by sacrifice. What is each partner willing to leave behind in the pursuit of the other happiness

[Alwayreckles93]

It has to be equal. Experience once being married in a loveless marriage. It's hard. I've learned my lesson. I do have regrets us woman we need to focus on finding a Christian guy who believes in God.

[Anemone978]

I would hope you both love each other to the best of your ability. You should both be trying to make the other one happy, when you don't the marriage fails.

[Haha456]

if you dont want a divorce, its best for both husband and wife to be equal.

[dustybiker]

We have zero control over love, unfortunately.

[spiritGirl13]

I would say neither because it’s selfish. They will be taking or looking to take from one another. Love isn’t something you do but you are.

[BJP21]

It should be equal it was delicate to start the relationship to begin with to get things into balance.

[WhiteBoyChill]

I would think the same. I mean why should any person be with somebody who doesn’t care about them just as much?

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

It's just how it is.

[WhiteBoyChill]

No seriously. If I’m married to some girl but she isn’t deeply in love with me, than why are we together?

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

I specifically said "more"?

[WhiteBoyChill]

The question just doesn’t make sense to me. I wouldn’t be married to a girl if we weren’t both deeply in love.

And how can one person be more deeply in love than another? It doesn’t make sense

[annabananna]

If you both equally love each other a whole lot that is ideal.

[KrakenAttackin]

Unless the woman loves the man more, it won't work.

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

It's not what I'm asking. I'm talking about equal or more?

[Kinkyhubby]

It should be equal. If it isn't there might be some problems

[DARKCLOUD1945X]

hate to bust everyone's bubble but marriage is 90%womam and 10%man

[Anonymous]

No love in life is EVER equal. But if it's healthy it ebbs and flows to where at times they love eachother as much.

[NathanDavis]

the closer to more balanced, the better

[AmeerX]

There is never equality in love

[OrallyFixated]

Equal? What do you mean? Equal how?

[ArtemisSilver]

Love is never equal in my experience.

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

Nor should be. Husbands ought to love their wife more than she loves him.

[ArtemisSilver]

Why's that?

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

I'm speaking from a Biblical perspective. It's because that's what God commands and desires.

Women is the gift to man by God, but not man to the woman.

And lastly, women seriously need to feel more loved and appropriated since they are the weaker gender.

[ArtemisSilver]

Be that as it may, modern feminism has taught many women that men are disposable and has poisoned many womens ability to love. There needs to be balance for a marriage to work.

[_piotr]

If what Bible is telling is true then it must be so good to be woman and have all this privileges. Being man seems like being a looser.

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

@_piotr: The Bible doesn't teach men are disposable, and the Bible does teach that the wife also ought to love her husband, it's just the husband has to love her more.

[Likes2drive]

I would hope it’s equal

[Pudsmucker]

It is an equal companionship.

[Anonymous]

I believe it's not a competition.