Okay so short story here:
My mom started having kids at 16.
2 of the dads she married, my biological father she didn't. One night stand ordeal, took me 17 years to find out. My mom's 44, stepdad 38, me 25.
All ex husbands &/or dads are pieces of shit. 13 years ago she married the man of her dreams who we call stepdad. Was a single, young, insecure poor af mom for the 13 years i was around prior to that. He helped turn her into the badass nurse she is today.
I look EXACTLY like my mom. Hentz not knowing for 17 years that my dad wasn't my dad.
So I have 3 dad's. A legal one who raised me, who I believed was my dad. A biological dad (and family) and a stepdad who was the man who was gonna walk me down the isle someday. He's the only one who I respected and was around. We were pretty close.
I lived by myself for 7 years, moved home about a year ago after a bad breakup.
About 6 months ago, I was showering and turned around to see my stepdads phone recording me showering. I freaked out. He bailed. Mom at work. We eventually talked about it and he said he was super high and had no idea what he was doing. It was stupid, would never happen again. So sorry. I told him that it better not fucking ever, he promised. I was relatively cool about it, but firm. He went on vacation for 7 weeks shortly after and we've been fine since.
Fast forward to this morning. I wake up because i feel shit moving around my hip/butt area. Realize he's trying to move my blankets and pillow (I sleep pillow between legs usually naked) to get a picture of my vag. Which he mentioned semi recently that when he was crazy high before, wanted to pay me 2k to make a video of. I laughed it off thinking he was kidding. Truly thought it wouldn't happen again.
I yelled loudly, "are you fucking kidding me?" As I woke up. He said he was dropping off cigarettes that he took from me and left. Haven't spoken since.
After this I literally stayed in bed wide awake and terrified for 3 hours. On 3 adderall hours of sleep. When I finally got up I panicked and packed a bag and left. Had no place to go, sat in my car for 5 hours, crying half the time, until I had to work. I minorly told the guy im 'dating' what was wrong, stupid idea he wants to kick his ass. I finally just got home from work and once again am panicking. I never thought in a million years I would be in this position. I feel so fucking violated!
My mom's a great mom. If I tell her, she will leave him. Which will mean she'll also lose the house, the love of her life, everything. My family will split, and it'll be my fault.
My grandpa molested my cerebral pulse' having little sister about 10 years back and that's almost exactly what happened. Family split. Not her fault but.....
I truly have 0 idea what to do and I need fucking help. Im not gonna go to the cops, that advice sucks. I can't live here any longer but I have no place to go. I can't afford to live alone, I know no one to move in with. My mom would also nag and question why I'm moving out or putting a lock on door or anything. We're very close.
For the love of god help me.