Do we really need relationships or romantic love in order to survive or be happy?

Question

It is such a freeing feeling for me to have given up completely on finding love or seeking relationships. I’m a 23 years old female virgin who never been in a relationship and I’ve recently decided to remain this way, maybe forever and it wouldn’t bother me.

I realised it is not worth the trouble, and I’m very high on the soul, and I realised that most people only care about the external compared to the internal. So it’s not something I want to seek anymore. « Yeah you’ll find the right person, there are people who value the same things as you » yeah yeah or maybe there isn’t? And I don’t want to live my life seeking a fantasy.

It’s like a weight have been lifted off my shoulders, I no longer live through the male gaze or seek validation, because I no longer desire relationships with men, unless it’s platonic friendship, so it doesn’t matter to me anymore.

I found there is so much more to life, travelling, studying, doing art, nature, museums, friendships, meeting new souls every day. I don’t know why there is such a big emphasis on romantic love and on sexuality. I honestly feel way better off without it.

Anyone feeling the same way?
Anyone who is older than me and lead a celibate life so far? How’d it go?

Feel free to share your thoughts

Finchie40 · Accepted Answer

It’s your life and your decision , if you don’t want to fall in love and get married or have kids and have a family then that’s your choice , don’t let anyone tell you otherwise , if being alone makes you happy then be alone. Me personally wants to find true love , even though I had my fair share of failed relationships, I still have hope that love exists , mainly because I believe in God , I believe we are put on this Earth to find true love and find peace and happiness , find someone to settle down with, find someone that stands by you like you stand by them , nowadays it seems harder to find , mainly from how screwed up this society has become and how selfish people have become , I am not saying I am perfect what so ever , but I believe good hearted people still exist , people that have good morals that want to fall in love as well , it is sadly just taking longer to find. But I have faith in God and God is my savior , even though I am not much of a holy roller , I have my faith in God and believe the words in the Bible , God wants us to find love , he wants us to get married , he wants us to have a family , reading and learning the Bible has opened a bunch of new doors in my life , it helped me see things from a whole different perspective , we can only give what we want to receive , peace and love and happiness only comes from what we give to others , especially the person we want by our side , your spouse , you will not receive , unless you give. Sadly we live in a selfish society where most oeople just want to receive without giving in return and they wonder why , they can’t find love. You can’t expect someone to do for you , if you can’t do for them period. Love only grows when 2 people choose each other over everyone else it can’t be one sided

DaveJord · Accepted Answer

So, first off you are woman. I am a man, so biologically we are completely different when come to hormones, desires, needs and wants.

Sex is 100% better when there is an emotional bound. Now it does not need to be love pre se, but on some level there needs to be that connection.

If you were to ask me right now, David would prefer a relationship, or just a long-term situation where you can get together once a month and share a weekend together. I would say the once-a-month weekend together for the rest of my life. I think that would make me very happy, and over time if that works out then you never know where it might lead to.

There are plenty of guys and girls, that want nothing to do with relationships... but honestly, that sounds sad to me. Because it sounds like you have given up on something, because it is hard. And if you have never had it, then yes, it's easy to never want it. But once you do taste the forbidden fruit, and make that commitment... I mean if feels good, and it has the possibility to change your perspective on life.

But yes, I do not need a woman to be happy. That is a fact, I am happy without one, but nothing I could do, other than win the lottery, would make me happier than to have someone to share it all with.

You ae very young, I would experience a little more live first before making any statements about forever. Because as a virgin, you have no clue what it feels like to have that special bond with someone, and it would be sad to think someone could willing to their whole life without experiencing it at least once.

CupcakeTheDestroyer · Accepted Answer

I’m asexual, I figured that out after being introduced to the term. I’ve never cared that much about having sex, having a relationship sounded nice until I realized just how much goes into it and how much is expected of you. I would rather just be a friend than a lover. It’s entirely possible to go for your entire life without a romantic relationship and still be happy, however you should not be alone. Make a community, have friends and family around you, humans are social creatures and we work better with a group we can interact with, it helps to keep you sane and grounded.

Romantic relationships aren’t a bane though, when they work out they can bring a lot of good things to your life you weren’t expecting. It’s just a matter of finding someone you can connect with. If you feel a desire to be in a relationship or feel a desire to have sex with someone, I wouldn’t write off romantic relationships entirely. By all means, make yourself and your interests your priority as you grow, now is the prime time of your life to do so, but if you do want a companion of the romantic variety there’s nothing wrong with saying so either. Frankly, people can have as much romance as they like, your choices are your own.

wolfcat87 · Accepted Answer

It really depends on the person. My mom was only into toxic and married men, so when she decided to completely stop seeing men she was happier. She hasn't done anything with a man in 30 years and is fine. She's also always been a bit self absorbed, so she's not cut out to be a family person.

On the other hand, I didn't mind a life of solitude when I was younger, but I've always been family oriented and prefer taking care of others. That brings me fulfillment and is impossible to reach without a family. So, I would be miserable if I hadn't created a close circle of people and pets that I enjoy making happy and spoiling.

Neither is wrong. Both are just based on different personalities, wants, and drives in life.

There are hermits who have had little to no human contact for decades and were happy.

Anonymous · Answer

Exactly like @DextroShade said.

I say:
It is the unfortunate fact that we need each other. If not romantic, at least a good relationship.
If not a partner, then plenty of good relationships.

Put into mind, what makes a family or siblings that special is: Being under same situation/circumistances.
Could be: physical, geographical, mental, racial, ideological.. etc.

Yet, the more mutual you share togethor, the more care each gets.

Think about people during a disaster, they'll be one family at it. After it is done, nobody will care for you. Except those who share what you have. And that's your family or who act as your family.

Others have mentioned that too.

Anonymous · Answer

its quite sad how people see being lonely as a better option.

You will not lead a happy fulfilled life living in solitude. Humans are designed to be tribal animals. Humans are designed by nature to need social stimulation. This is why families live together. This is why people feel the need for friends. This is why people socialize when they are put together. This is why people tend to live in houses are built in clusters within neighborhoods. We are social animals. We are designed to want to be part of a community. There are plenty of studies that have proven this.

I don't care about what people will tell you that you should pretend you're not lonely. You will never be TRULY happy if you are entirely alone with no friends, no loving family, no intimate relationships with anyone.

Single people tend to get sick more frequently and live shorter lives than married people. what does that tell you?

ChicoFromThe305 · Answer

Poor little anon, you sound very frustrated, it's not sweet out here for anyone, the best things are never easy to achieve, giving up just takes any bit of chance you had to achieve it, I do understand the frustration but I don't think your final choice should be giving up, if anything live life without the worry of having to seek validation or the pressure of it all but I don't believe you should give up, when you run into an opportunity, cease it, you won't regret it.

ProbablyClueless · Answer

I think we do need it, yes. But I also think that western society in particular cultivates a really unhealthy idea of what love looks like. So we get a bunch of people who are chasing something that they think is love but in truth, couldn't be further from it.

Anonymous · Answer

Modern women can go f themselves. Die alone or with cats. Now for the non promiscuous, good hearted, loving, pretty girl if she still exists, that's another story, but modern "liberated" cun4s can die alone, it's karma and well deserved.

Anonymous · Answer

Nope. I'm closing in on 50 have always been single and have always been pretty happy.

I'm not against relationships. Nor am I advocating for a single, celibate life. But I do think it's always better to be single than be with someone who doesn't truly value you.

lightbulb27 · Answer

Been there done that.. around your age.  No but there is no denying what is going on. Iife is not easy… you have to learn and concur… starting with your own self!

genericname85 · Answer

do we really need food to taste good in order to survive? no. but it sure helps with the general enjoyment of life. same with the question you asked.

MissStrawberry912 · Answer

I want that love/human connection but essentially happiness only starts with you and what you make of it with your perception & choices.

Nikki1989 · Answer

We are designed to be with other people. There are good reasons why the single die earlier than people in relationships.

Unit1 · Answer

I grew up and survived without love. It's feeling pretty standard to me. With that said, i am happier with nice good girls and cuddling them.

syncheart · Answer

I got some problems that having someone to help me with would be good! But I think I'm going to be alone all my life for the same problems that causes me to think that I need a help mate.

KrakenAttackin · Answer

Only women do. Men are used to being alone. For a woman, "being alone" means her friend zone is filled guys who are only 6's.

Men can and often do go a decade or more without any meaningful human contact outside of work.

WhyohWhy69 · Answer

Most people do. It’s in our DNA. Being alone constantly is a sign of mental illness.

sheikalana · Answer

No, you don't need but it's amazing to be in a relationship.

Jazzy54 · Answer

There are many people who are single by choice. If that’s you, go for it. 😊

Juxtapose · Answer

Generally yeah, to be truly happy a fulfilling a relationship is something almost everyone needs.

OddBeMe · Answer

It is the most common human behavior. And the most common variable of the self described happiest people.

DreamLife7 · Answer

To survive no. That sounds very needy and codependent

whistlingwh0res · Answer

It's a bitch eat bitch world. Relationship is the same thing. You are happy eating bitch for a while and then some other bitch eat you later.

Do we really need relationships or romantic love in order to survive or be happy?

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