Relationships

Love is Patient, Love is Kind

Found in 1 Corinthians 13: 4-7, these everlasting lines have been memorized by countless people during Sunday School and Vacation Bible Schools, recited at numerous weddings, and quoted to quarreling couples. However, the history of these words is often unknown. The book of Corinthians was one of the letters Paul wrote, aimed at the church in Corinth. The people here were disputing with themselves about whose gifts were greater. Paul had to remind them that we are all equal and that we need to love and accept one another.



But enough with the bible lesson. There is a reason these words are told to people in love- it shows us what love actually is and what it does for us and for the people we love. We may not be fighting with each other as much as the Corinthians, so how does this verse relate to us today? What exactly is love?


Love is patient...


Love is indeed patient. We often tell our current significant other or spouse "I'll wait for you" implying that we will wait for them to be ready for us, no matter how long it takes. When told to a friend, it could easily mean "I'll wait for you to tie your shoe." In a more serious context, it could be seen as "I'm here when you are ready to talk." Patient Love also allows us to hold back our tempers when we are aggravated or annoyed because someone is not seeing our way.


Love is kind...


This one is "kind" of obvious (pun intended). Love is kind. We do nice things for people we love to show our kindness, be it complimenting them on their new hairdo or bringing them coffee on a cold day. We are polite and respectful to people we love, another form of kindness. We do favors for them and ask nothing in return simply because we want to be a kind person. Kind Love gives us the thoughts, courage, and strength to take action to do kind deeds for other people.



It does not envy...


Love isn't jealous. If we love our best friend, then why are we jealous when they are in a relationship and we are single? Do we actually love them? I think we still do. Deep down, we want them to be happy, and if that means having to share our best friend with someone else then I guess we can do that. What about being jealous of a person at school or work getting the latest version of the iphone? I don't love them. Can I be jealous of them? No, I can't. Whether we realize it or not, we love everybody, just to different extents. Instead, I should be happy that they got the latest version- maybe it is something they've worked hard for, maybe it is something that they really don't need because they can barely afford to feed their own kids. Who knows. Happy Love allows us to be happy and excited for other people, rather than focusing on ourself.


It does not boast, it is not proud...


Who has been the friend that gets slightly annoyed when they see their friends posting a thousand "couple pictures" with a ton of emoticons and a caption that reads "Me and bae oxox" *raises hand*. Or who has been on the other side of a "Look what my parents got me just because!" *raises hand higher*. Who has been one of these people? *barely raises hand*. Are we showing love in these situations? We are definitely showing love for something, but not the right thing. Mindful Love reminds us that not everyone can be as blessed as we are.



It is not rude, it is not self-seeking...


When I get angry, I tend lash out at people. I use what I know about them that will bring them to their knees. Do I regret this? Quite often. Am I cranky in the morning? Why, of course. Do I forget to thank someone for a gift? I'm human, aren't I? I think we've all faced some scenario like this, and sadly, we've also broken someone down to build ourselves up. Thankfully, Loving Love helps us remember that those people are human beings with feelings too.


It is not easily angered...


Yikes, when was the last time I got angry at someone? Erm... lets not go there. We all get angry at one point or another, and we all tend to say mean and hurtful things or do something wrong. Do we really mean to do these things? Of course not. Our temper gets out of hand and we forget in our blind rage (what? we all don't have blind rage?) All the forms of Love mentioned before can help us deal with not being easily angered, especially Patient Love.


It keeps no record of wrong...


Bringing up the past is an easy thing to do, it often is the basis for revenge. "She did this so now I have to do this..." and the cycle continues, or "Do I take him back after cheating on me?" It is definitely hard letting go, I know it is for me. I tend to hold grudges way longer than I should. And trusting someone again after being hurt? I'm not so sure about this. Maybe keeping Kind Love and Forgiving Love in mind will help us deal with the past. Those kinds of love will definitely help me "Let it go" (yes, like Frozen).



Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices in the truth...


"Honesty is the best policy." We've all heard that right? There is a reason... It's kind of true. Nothing good ever comes out of "No, nothing is wrong." when something actually is wrong. When the truth is told it connects people and brings them closer. This part rings true for most marriages: love flourishes when we are truthful in what we say. Nothing good comes out of lying. Truthful Love and Open Love will help us tell the truth and take the honesty of what someone says in stride.



It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, and always perseveres...


Didn't Lily Potter protect Harry Potter from Voldemort with her love? Didn't Rose trust Jack to not drop her? Don't we hope the best for our loved ones? Didn't Noah and Allie's love from the Notebook persevere? These classic examples show the importance of Strong Love.



Love holds the key to open any door, mentally, spiritually, and physically. Which type of Love do you struggle with the most? How can you improve yourself? Have you Loved someone today?


Love is Patient, Love is Kind
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