Cheating on a trip to Thailand?

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend is on a 5 week trip to Thailand. He is staying in hostels and every time he texts me he is drunk and at a hostel party. He travelled alone because i have no interest in going there and he couldn't find a friend to go with him. I just have this gut wrenching feeling that something is going to happen with that much temptation around. My friends boyfriend told me that he knows so many guys that go on trips like that alone so they can cheat and no one will ever find out. Im SO paranoid. Has anyone gone to Thailand and stayed in a hostel? What was it like? Was there lots of hook ups?

[braveminded]

dear friend , forget all this hesitated opinion or non experienced people and i dare to tell you about way of thinking , i am A man who loves my girlfriend more than my self i've been in thailand for staying together and i went thailand alone few months before she come to me , i am a type of straight and strong minded guy i dont even believe in sex with strangers because i used to dislike it as much as this is only 1 night stand without love so better to do not do specially i am honest man with my self if i do it once i will feel i am dirty even with my self its not just about my girlfriend its about my own principles that i dont like it if it happened out of love so i am the last person who do this. my 2nd reason my parents are doctors and i am well educated and i know those bar girls might transfer to me ( STD , HIV , AIDS , etc.. ) so why should i put my life in risk? this hooker won't help me if i got sick but simply i dont want make my life shorter by my hands getting sickness. my 3rd reason i know if i done any bad my girlfriend will never know but let's be honest.. she put on me a huge big trust and faith in me she know i am for her only and she give me all her love she is clean to me and i am clean to her.. so please why should i go to hooker in a bar mean nothing to me? honestly if one day i do bad like this i will leave my girlfriend by my self because i feel dirty , today i am living with honor and pride that i am clean man. simply my love to my Thai wife is the reason what make me never want to look to any other , even she sometimes dont believe my honesty i think she dont believe there is a guy like that in real but the truth this is the way i am because i grew up in clean family weather and educated with full freedom and i decided to live and die as a clean man i dont care friends who make fun of me or push me to go with hookers in bars in thailand , i decided to live as sport man & motorbike rider enjoy clean life waiting my beloved wife who have the right in all of me

[DanAG]

Thailand is a well know destination for sex tourism. Maybe the best known in the world. However I strongly disagree with all the people saying he is definitely going to prostitutes. There are LOTS of tourists who go to Thailand for the normal reasons people like to travel - sights, nature, culture, whatever. You can't just exclude some parts of the world as a tourist destination just because it has a lot of prostitution. There are several other places known for sex tourism. But you can't assume anything about them either.

Yea, there might be a reason to be suspicious. But you can't assume anything. You now him better than people answering your question. Use your own judgment.

[Asker]

thanks a lot. Its hard to not get caught up in what other people are saying when I haven't been able to talk to him that much and everyone is making me pretty paranoid. He's a good guy and he loves me.

[kangy]

Yes totally agreed

[DanAG]

Like I said, you know him best. See how he acts when he comes back.

Also, I was defending Thailand. I've heard nothing but good about the people in Thailand. It's a beautiful country and I've heard the people are very friendly. I'm sure the vast majority of Thais hate that reputation.

[TheDevilInside]

It's a very, VERY bad idea for a guy to go to Thailand alone. The prostitutes are VERY aggressive when they see guys walking alone, with no girls with them. Went there with my white friend 2 years ago, and he was scared of walking alone down the beachside of Pattaya. The whole time I walked with him, the girls were eyeing us, probably wondering what the hell is he doing with me lol

Especially if your bf is a young white guy, he would most likely get many prostitutes after him. Probably even all prostitutes would want him as a client.

It would take some serious self control for him to not cheat.

But even if he does not cheat, there are still tons of shows there that you might not feel comfortable with. Ladyboys cabaret shows, Ping-pong shows, etc. The ladyboys cabaret shows aren't that bad. They're just a bunch of very pretty ladyboys dancing on the stage and standing outside for the audience to take pictures with. But the pingpong shows... Now that's something else.

[kangy]

Yes the ladies can be aggressive

[TheDevilInside]

VERY aggressive, kangy. I stared at this lady (no idea if it was a true she or a he/she) because I thought he/she looked so flaming hot and sexy, I would definitely want to bang her if I was a guy. She caught my eye and grabbed my wrist really tightly it hurt. She was a promoter of some kind for this club, and she grabbed my wrist to encourage me to get into the club.

[Anonymous]

Asian countries are full of prostitutes literally they're everywhere. I think Southeast Asia is worse but it's still bad even in Japan and China but Thailand and Vietnam are then worst I think. God I feel for you. How can you be with him for that long? honestly why is he even there for 5 weeks to begin with?

[Asker]

Cause he went to vietnam last year and had so much fun he went to thailand this year... wtf

[Opinion Owner]

Omg i think Vietnam is full of prositutes too. He probably already cheated on you. I mean think about it what guy with a girlfriend would go to Thailand and Vietnam alone.. Why not visit some place like France or Italy... ?

[Asker]

I thought he just wanted to see the sights and experience the culture. He's sent pictures of himself on the desert and canoeing and stuff. I thought thats why he went

[Opinion Owner]

Well maybe he did go to see the sights. I mean it doesn't make sense to stay 5 weeks to sleep with prostitutes :)

[kangy]

Yes thailand is a good place for many who want sex svc. But doesn't mean he cheat like what others said. Pls dont get too affected by what u read here. I suggest u communicate w him on this.. be direct but dont jump straight away.
Is he a strong minded person?

[kangy]

please dont think too much
just talk to him

[Naomivictorov]

Well, I have a similar situation.. basically my boyfriend (we‘re almost 3 years together) was before me a fboy and he also cheated on me once. I did get chlamydia from him.. but I forgave him. Then he went on a trip with his "bro" who is worse than my boyfriend ever was. He goes to clubs and has really disturbing stories about prostitutes and his fun.. yeah so my boyfriend went to 1 month trip with this dude to Thailand. I have been there like 7 years ago, but I know how shit is going down there even tho I was 14 yo. He went to Bangkok, Phuket, Pattaya💀 and kho samui. Nowww when my mom found out about Pattaya, things got interesting. He booked before I even knew what it is known for. His friend had 70 condoms with himself which are same size as my boyfriend.. and when I saw them like on the table and some ripped off.. I was really nervous. He told me that they was his friends and he didn’t have nothing there.. He told me that he had touched fake tits on the street from a ladyboy with his friend, that they saw the ping pong shoot in Bangkok (because apparently some other girl with her boyfriend, that they met who were from Germany like him really wanted to) and that a ladyboy did kiss him on the cheek. Later on I found out that he had tinder and bumble (which he apparently only had for 2 days to see what people were there). He always had new Instagram followers (only girls or ladyboys) and apparently they asked him on the street.. but he didn’t wanted to unfollow them until he came back and also deleted chats of them (just because it wasn’t necessary to keep them). He did STD test there before leaving even though he didn’t have any sexual contact.. his friend had once sex with a prostitute and in the meantime my boyfriend was walking on the street and waiting.. now when he’s back I see him archiving text messages with prostitutes here in Germany.. about how much they cost and where to find them also most of them seem to be biologically male.. now very important is that my boyfriend is a hard believer (Christian) and he really is focused about god. I am scared that I might have done something wrong or I don't know I always tried my best to seduce him in every way. He always speaks about someday getting married and growing old, but I don’t want to marry and grow old with a boy who is not mature enough and actually following the devil instead.. even though I am Jewish and I would rather date a Jew, I still support him. I am really interested and open minded for him and his ways. I have sacrificed a lot to get with him together. I never have been his type and I did change my look, my hair color, wearing colored contacts and going to the gym, just to show him that the look always can change and I would change everything for him. I am scared to be lonely and broken again.. next month he’s going to America for a month to visit his adoptive family in Louisiana.. I have never been to the USA, but I am scared that something’s might go wrong.. thanks for reading and helping:) lots of love from Germany:)

[GamerArtNerd]

Why didn't you just go with him? He clearly didn't want to go alone and expected his girlfriend to be there for and to at least TRY to enjoy it. If he was going there to cheat, he probably wouldn't have even asked you to go in the first place. I think he may be calling you while drunk/partying to show you what fun you're missing out on. Again though if you have such little trust in him not to cheat on you then I think you should have just went with him and you need to squash out whatever issue sparked the lack of trust.

[Asker]

lol cause i can't just shed out the money when i'm in school... Sure i'll just drop my life and go to Thailand for 5 weeks! Also I was never actually asked it was more assumed i wouldn't go

[syd48]

I went to Thailand with three other guys. There are women everywhere (not in brothels) and they make it clear they are available. Two guys in our group were really playing with the women.
Myself and my friend did not get involved, we saw the sights but did not get involved with women.
Thailand is an interesting place. Is he weak or strong and faithful? in which case maybe it is best to find out now , dont you think?
When he comes back I would ask him. There are many faithful men. They also visit Thailand sometimes with their partners..
It certainly sorts the men from the boys.

[Asker]

Ah thanks! Relief! Would it be wrong to ask if he cheated on me? I have no reason to believe he did. Or should i just wait to see if any std symptoms show up?

[syd48]

Ask away. Don't be shy. In the hotels are condoms and restaurants bring one with your bill.
I dont agree with tiptoeing around the subject when potentially your health could be at risk.
He needs to convince you that he did not.
As you can see from comments here, the default position is that most men go there and do.
The onus is on him and you should not be shy about asking, not now or at any other time.
Demand respect and honesty.
Be prepared to dump an unfaithful man if that is what he is. They dont change.

[Longshot]

I have been there. I know you do not want to hear this, but I am just being forthright. I feel like it's a place where you could get a hooker for $25 ... maybe less. I had a legitimate massage for $10 and then the girl asked to do everything with me you can name and things I never thought of before. At one point, I read an article that 50% of the bar girls there have STDs.

I am NOT slamming your BF at all, but temptation is everywhere. If he is good to you and a prince, then you are OK. If he is weak in anyway it will be tough. It could happen when he is drunk. you need to contact him (text?) and explain your feelings.

[Peter05]

All my friends who go to Thailand have sex with prostitutes. They say it's normal there and men usually go to Thailand for sex anyway. Didn't you know that Thailand is the world's centre of prostitution? ?

There are brothels everywhere. I am sure he will cheat on you not just once but many times. Thailand is all about sex for men. Sad but true.

[Asker]

whaaaaaat? :'(

[Panzer103]

I want to refute this. But I can't.

[SandPlanet]

You either trust him or you don't. If you can't fully trust him, then why would you be with him? Or is the relationship very fresh?

[Asker]

been dating for 3 years. Honestly I don't trust anyone 100% and never will

[SandPlanet]

Three years and not enought trust that he won't betray you? Well, in that case there is no help for you regarding this. You will always be paranoid.

[Terryrocks]

Prostitution is a tourist attraction in Thailand. I can guarantee you that he is going to cheat on you. In Thailand its natural for men to use prostitutes I feel so bad for you right now. ..

[Terryrocks]

Forgot to say. If he will say to you he went to a massage parlour he meant a brothel. At least they don't pretend to be massage salons like in America.

[Asker]

how do you know this?

[Peter05]

I been through a lot.

[Terryrocks]

Oh peter darling long time no seen. Message me please.

[Prof_Don]

Prostitution is big in southeast Asia... its a common trend for men to go there and getting some side action.

Im not saying your boyfriend is... the odds just aren't in ur favor (especially since you seem to not trust him from the get go).

[nickstaa]

Sorry I don't want to get you more paranoid. But if someone is going to cheat, being on holiday in the other side of the world in a party atmosphere surrounded by hot girls will be the perfect environment.

But that doesn't mean he is cheating.

[Ariesman81]

Yeah... he's definitely getting solicited. There's some gorgeous bitches in Thailand!

[johnboymuscles]

Did he get caught cheating or was he a good boy? Just curious

[jadynerose]

I'd just wait till he got home asked him up front over his favorite meal and then ask him to get an std test to be safe for both of you