Why does that committed guy flirt with me?

[Anonymous]

He flirts with me A LOT. He already has a girlfriend and claims that he really 'loves' her but it's always me to whom he talks till late at night. When I said that I didn't like his behavious towards me and should not flirt he gave me a stupid reason: "Guys don't flirt with their girlfriends because they love them."
If he claims to love her so much so is it justified talking to another girl till late at night, asking her out on dates and saying that he likes her and on realizing that she is not seeming interested, disguising the behaviour as friendly one?

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[NoelChuat]

I'm really sure he has some problems in his relationship. and if he's really flirting with you, just be honest with him. Tell him;

"hey I don't want to mess around with your relationship and neither do I want to get into trouble. Carry on with your girlfriend and stop messing with me"

and also,
"Guys don't flirt with their girlfriends because they love them."
that's one of the stupidest things I've heard in 2014.

[Asker]

I clearly said that to him that he must understand how his gf would feel. Instead, he told me this stupid line. And maybe he doesn't have any prob with his relationship but he is just an immature guy who can't value his gf. He is in high school after all. And being in college, I think very few high school guys are actually wise enough.

[killerboots]

Well men that are taken usually flirt with women more because in case their current relationship doesn't work they can keep their pick up artist game sharp. On top of that, they don't really care about being rejected as much as single men.

Being in a relationship with a woman long enough can deteriorate a man's pick up game because a lot can happen during the relationship. Hope that helps.

[Asker]

But if you love someone, you really don't think that someday you would have to start your flirting game again. You just LOVE that one person. So, it does not matter if the pick up game deteriorate.

[killerboots]

It does matter. They could love each other now but in 5 years many things can change. And the last thing a guy want to happen is his gf break up with him and he has no game. So that's why some committed guys flirts with women. Hate to say it, but thats how life is.

[Asker]

Maybe it does for some people. But not for all. If everyone is constantly flirting with other people just because they THINK that a relationship would fail, God knows what the world would be.

[killerboots]

I didn't say all committed men, I said some committed men. Like I said, he may be committed but doesn't he can't flirt with other and vice versa. If you have a problem with the guy then I suggest you take it up to his girl.

[Asker]

This time I come off really strong, so i think he would back off on his own now. Moreover, I don't want trust issues between them in any way so I will stay away from him. Thanks for your opinion. :)

[Anonymous]

I would despise a man like that... What a joke. His poor girlfriend? Least he could do is break up with her and be honest... but no... he fakes his loyalty like the coward that he is. NO THANKS.

[Asker]

Ikr! And when I clearly said that he should not flirt (I don't want to flirt back because I don't like him) he gives me an idiotic reason how a boyfriend does not flirt with his gf because they love him? It makes me feel used to release his over active hormonal urges.

[Opinion Owner]

Laughing My Ass Off... Use your better judgement.,, THIS GUY is a coward and a cheat on like 44 different levels. Keep it classy. Ignore him and find a man who is not cheating on his main woman?

[Asker]

You know what the most fucked up thing is? I have told him I am crazily in love with another guy. And even though my feelings arr unrequited, I just don't feel like flirting with another guy at this point of my time because of my feelings. And that guy is already comitted and yet it seems like he has no respect for his gf.

[GalaxyHotChoc]

Whatever it is, it doesn't matter. Just drop him like a hot potato. He doesn't sound like a guy that's cut out for relationships if he's flirting with you behind her back.

[red324]

You have the most beautiful skin tone:) I wish girls like you lived in the US.

[Asker]

You are right. I will keep your advice in mind.

[Roycaryn]

This is definitely a problem with his relationship, he just hasn't realized it yet.

[Asker]

Seems like so. When I said to him playfully that I will tell his gf, he said not to. Obviously. If you are loyal, you have nothing to hide. He knows it will ruin his relationship.

[Anonymous]

Married men flirt because they won't cheat. Just remember he has a family and keep it light... no harm no foul.

[Asker]

Okay, so you mean if they won't flirt, they will cheat? I don't think so. I know many guys are loyal. If a guy if flirting with other girls, it means something is missing in his relationship, perhaps.

[Opinion Owner]

Well there is a difference. .. flirting as in some one I know... playful bantering. .. versus out and out being a dog... most men will flirt to a degree... but most men have morals...

[Asker]

But if there should be a limit. What the fuck is this? Saying that someone is really good ALL the time? Asking her out on dates? Talking to her till 2 AM? Excuse me, but his behaviour screams "I am single" even though he is not.

[Opinion Owner]

All of that would be over the line. Much more than "flirting"... I am meaning innocent cute words during daylight hours... no where near what you are saying...

[Asker]

I know it's over the top. And I still think that if you are HIGHLY satisfied in your current relationship, you would hardly flirt. No because of commitment issues but because at times one person become your priority and other girls or guys take a back seat.