My friends with benefits has a girlfriend? Is that acceptable?

[katze0917]

The person just wanted to be friends with benefits. I once told him that I cut off with a man because he lied to me that he was single (he actually has a fiance!). So he assured me that he's currently not in any relationship. He even showed me screencap between him and his "ex" as a proof that he is available now.

One day, he tagged a girl on his post. I went through her profile and discovered she is the "ex" because of matching picture on the screenshot. They also dined together quite often. I asked him why did he told me he broke up. He just said "broke up what" and remained silent.

I really don't get it. I feel like he made a fool of me, or he just don't understand that you cannot have friends with benefits and girlfriend at the same time. Or did I get it wrong? I've asked many friend, both Western and Asian and they said you can date freely if you have friends with benefits, but not when you call someone your gf/bf?

[Uziel_007]

LOL, if his girlfriend knows and she's fine with it which I don't think she will be. You are clear, do what you want.

If he's going behind his girlfriend's back and doing this, you need to put your foot down, be an adult and not continue this relationship any longer. It was fine when you didn't know. Now you are basically an accomplice to an immoral behaviour from the guy.

[Kidding91]

It's all up to your morality. You're friend with benefits. If he cheats, he is acting like an asshole. If you can't stand it stop it.

[LunaJ]

you can't cheat with friends with benefits. you're not a couple

[katze0917]

Yes I don't mind if he dates or fuck around, but if he has a girlfriend, then it is a problem to me.

[LunaJ]

that shows you have a good heart ^^

[LunaJ]

ofc he fooled u. friends with benefits is about pure sex, don't hope for else, lol.
he said he's single cos that what you wanted to hear to let him into your pants.
don't be this naive, girl 😘

friends with benefits is perfect for guys n to those girls who don't have high standards.
or really doing it with a real friend who they know for w while

[katze0917]

I didn't expect anything, I just feel that I'm being fooled so I cut off with him. I need clarity and don't want to be someone's sextoy. So you mean he did that on purpose?

[LunaJ]

yes, he did that on purpose.

but i don't get you. you don't want to be a sextoy. but.. by me friends with benefits is exactly about that.

ofc you can find a guy who respects you. but does friends with benefits lead anywhere? i think only to that, that one of them will get hurt emotionally

[katze0917]

This sound explicit but friends with benefits is just about using each other for sex, but he lied so it makes me feel... cheap? Sounds like his girlfriend doesn't know, but I demand clarity and don't accept that kind of situation. It's hard to explain, maybe cultural difference. Mostly Asian are not okay with sex friend thing, considered that a kind of 3rd person.

[LunaJ]

thanks for the new info that mostly Asians reject it in the world 😁

yep, exactly for that reason i don't understand it. you feel yourself cheap. maybe you would do feel it in general too with a guy who's single, but you have to realize it.

[katze0917]

Yes, I'm sure that mostly Asian do. Even visiting prostitute is enough for divorce.
About the friends with benefits thing. This is the last time, maybe I should avoid this.. The whole idea of friends with benefits is just toxic and is easily abused...

[LunaJ]

well said, go for it.

[Shrewmy]

Yes it is. Friends with benefits isn't an exclusive thing. Just hope the girls knows about it!

[katze0917]

the problem is he had to lie, so high chance that his girlfriend doesn't know.

[RoxyGlitter]

If he has a girlfriend and she doesn't know, its probably a good idea to find a new friends with benefits. If she finds out there could possibly be bloodshed.

[DefinitelySane]

So he's cheating on his girlfriend. And there's no way she's okay with it, if he's lying about his relationship.

[reptocarl]

You can only have a friends with benefits if it’s ok with your bf/gf. He’s a cheater and a liar

[Augstri]

If he has a girlfriend that doesn't know about you then there could be some trouble 😂

If you guys want you could just stay friends and get rid of the benefits part or just not be friends entirely

[rubymig]

No, for his girlfriend

[cupidkisses]

You should leave him

[Anonymous]

No absolutely nkt