My girlfriend parties every weekend. It bothers me. What do I do? (Page 3)

Question

So me and my girlfriend have been together ever since October 2017, and when we got together I found out that she smokes and does weed occasionally, and she drinks a lot. She is not an alcoholic (which she claims), but sometimes her alcohol intake even proves and shows that she may be doing it too far. She also does it because her friends do it too, and some even do it way worse and more than her. Pretty much party girls.  Her past is quite traumatizing and became an LDR since May 2018 and I'm in Poland now 'till this day. (We lived nearby each other in the same city in Scotland). I've always supported her and stayed by her side and gave out my opinion without being/sounding toxic or controlling. Or even just open up. She hangs around with people that I used to be friends with, she even kissed my best friends and properly made out with them and and god knows what else, she went to a nightclub and made out with 4 guys also (we aren't friends anymore because she talked about me behind my back to all of her and my friends at parties drunk/high on how I'm "toxic" and "controllive", so all my friends believed that and lost total respect for me and ditched me).  The worst part is, she lied to me how she doesn't do weed anymore and she doesn't smoke, yet she did it all behind my back and even confessed that in March 2018 she bought a full pack of cigarettes. And not just that. Her partying, kissing other girls, drinking, things that we had a deep talk about and came up with a compromise, yet she it did it her way.  I understand that she likes doing it and it may relieve her stress and maybe cheer her up, but she started to do it every weekend now, pretty much on both weekdays, and seeing her hangover and ill, even communicating with her is not the same girl that I fell in love with.  I don't know what to do anymore, whether I should be with her and continue our relationship like this in that cycle of breaking up and getting back together over all of this or break up.

DamnMan · Answer

"Her past is quite traumatizing and became an LDR since May 2018"

Cut it. LDR do not work mainly of lack of sex. You need to be close to have it and intimacy.
Also, she is not ready for a relationship if she's messing with others like that.
Cut it and look for someone else.

QueenofCups · Answer

This sounds like a really toxic relationship. You should find someone else.

PinkMichae · Answer

She doesn't sound ready to settle down or commit to someone. You don't sound compatible. She's an adult and can choose to drink and smoke. But its uncool for her to cheat on you. Find someone you're more compatible with.

Anonymous · Answer

She cheats on you (making out with other guys) & you still don't break up with her? Have some self-respect mate, otherwise you're partially to blame. You don't have to put up with that shit.
Break up.
Tbh no controlling guy thinks he's controlling, but regardless of whether or not you are, she's doing the wrong things TOO. So break up, you're both terrible for each other.

LuWe22 · Answer

To be honest please break up and end it all. She does not respect you and the relationship

AtomicCheesing · Answer

Dump her, take time to heal and then look for someone better

proteus912 · Answer

I think you should end it. It’s not fair for you to wait around for her when she clearly doesn’t want to change. She’s not treating you right so it would be best for you to just end it

SuzyB · Answer

Sorry to say this but it seems like a toxic relationship. You can't help someone who doesn't want to be helped. I think youd be better off if you walked away...

MagiAlphaOne · Answer

The deal breaker is not the smoking, weed and partying... IT'S THE LYING! What else has she lied about? And what important facts (Red Flags) is she possibly hiding from you. I say, drop her... WITHOUT EXPLANATION. And if you can, "Ghost" on her.

laurieluvsit · Answer

ANSWER: Find a new girl friend. Your trying way too hard to make this complicated Mr CM

insomnium95 · Answer

Dump her ass she’s probably running a train at each party.

rjroy3 · Answer

She's not your girlfriend anymore. So like... problem solved lol. Choose better next time brotha man. Have a spine to do what you know is the right thing to do, even when it's hard. That's true in any relationship you have.

MusicMayhem · Answer

She's trashy and doesn't meet your standards. Find a new girl that is a better match for you. You're in a LDR anyway so she'll feel it's easier for her to get away with cheating and otherwise sketchy behaviour.

_AfricanGoddess · Answer

Tell her how you feel , I mean you can’t stop her from partying entirely but you can have her turn it down a notch.

Samxahl · Answer

Personally I couldn't spend a day with a girl like that. Her cheating on you should be enough of a reason to break up with her

Bluedream13 · Answer

You dont know what to do? she's making out with ur friends then talking shit so they ditch u? R u a cuck? Take whats left of ur self respect and save it for a girl who won't shit all over u, she must b hot for u to b this stupid

Tdieseler · Answer

I was gonna say stop being a fuddy-duddy and join the fucking party... but i read the description and sadly, i agree with the ladies... especially after i saw LDR... Your relationship is over honey.

smileymarie · Answer

She's not for you. She really not ready to settle down nor slow her party life down. If she happens to be too friendly especially with your friend then she honestly for everybody. She just wants the thought of (you) someone to come back home to. But she thinking about herself for the most part. & Weed is not a problem but she can do that at home & relax watch some tv.

Blaboons · Answer

Listen bro, partying and smoking and all is fine. What isn't is the fact that even after being in a relationship, she chose to kiss random people and your friends. This isn't acceptable at all. I think you should let her go. Even if it might hurt for the time being.

andreasderjuengere · Answer

I think, you are on the way out already. Just be honest to yourself.

My girlfriend parties every weekend. It bothers me. What do I do? (Page 3)

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