Is it pathetic for a man to cry over a breakup?

I’m just wondering because I’ve been feeling down lately. My girlfriend broke up with me four days ago out of no where. I don’t know, since then; I just felt like crying at times (not in public of course) every time I think about it and now I’m starting to feel pathetic because of it. I just loved her so much and I thought what we had was genuine. I don’t know what went wrong and she won’t even reply to my texts asking for a reason behind the breakup.Is it pathetic for a man to cry over a breakup?

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Most Helpful Guys

  • It's actually better to cry over a breakup than to not cry over a breakup. And no, I'm not talking about the "oh you had no feelings for her" Shit.
    What I've learned from life the hard way is that bulking up feelings inside will affect you over time. Crying, expressing, accepting all the mixed feelings you have atm helps you feel so much lighter as if all the weight on your emotional shoulders is getting off. Embrace it buddy (;

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  • No we may not have the same emotional range as our female counter parts but we are still human if you prick us we bleed if we have major loss we will react emotionally

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Most Helpful Girls

  • It is pathetic to not be affected, it meqns you never loved them. How you express that isbup to you, crying is a human expression of emotion so I don't see the problem

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  • No, guys feel the sense of loss just as much as we girls do. So what's wrong with a good cry over a breakup?

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • Of course not, breakups can be tough and men have emotions too.

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  • There’s nothing at all wrong with crying. It’s 100% healthier than not allowing yourself to react.

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  • It's not pathetic. It's human. Heartache is part of what makes life matter. As a girl who's been begged and guilted back into relationships I didn't want, I have to say that even if she gave you a reason, it wouldn't be good enough. Even though it hurts and feels incredibly unfair, she technically doesn't owe you a reason. For God's sake, let yourself at least release some of that pain. It will damage you to force yourself to hold back any self expression.

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    • I agree here mostly but one thing I'll say is that if he really cared for her he deserves closure. It won't drastically heal him instantly but when the time comes when he does heal, he'll be so much better for having gotten the complete, open, honest, sincere truth. Moving on works so much better that way.

  • Absolutely not. Breakups hurt, and anyone should be able to grieve until they time heals them. Holding on to such things only make things a lot worse in the long run.

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  • NO. Let it out.
    There are times when the 'spark', 'desire' and love just burnt out, nothing left to prolong the relationship. It might be difficult for her to explain to you the 'reason' as any reason she provides isn't gonna sit well with you.

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  • Nope it is not
    But well

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  • As everyone is saying, it's normal.
    You really need a closure though. Her not giving one gives you the right to assume the worst: She didn't love you. You can imagine any situation, like her having to move far away soon.

    You have to regain control over your life now. You need friends and to start a new activity or hobby. Like: go to the gym, learn to play an instrument, or even something useless like playing D&D

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  • There is no reason why men can't cry when they are enduring a big personal loss. It's what humans do. Not just female humans, but all humans. We are made to express our feeling with tears during certain situations.

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  • No, you kinda need to do it but it is a bad sign of something else. It's a sign of confusion. You wouldn't need to cry if you understood the situation better.

    Crying in sone regard, is the body forcing a thought process, it's like an immediate forced conditioning from the mind so it may be able to process certain relevant thoughts better. People at funerals almost always cry, one of the main reaaons is because they go into a type of introspection which invokes memories that are otherwise lost in time. The crying part is basically a shut off mechanism for usual functioning drives, so that other neccessary processes can manage. A person with solid clarity may not need to cry, especially because they would have already devised an appropriate coarse of action.

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    • I may add to, that to my knowledge, some ancient cultures ritualized crying as it was understood to be the most rational form of action. In typical grieving, the thoughts are so immense, the pain is so intense, regular cognition cannot cope with it. Crying is fundamentally the only state where such a transformation is possible. It's like a type of instinctual meditation. It's promoted for the sake of it's practical and natural utility. It allows a natural process of thought to occur that just isn't available at any other time. It's often neccessary in order to come to a realisation of reality. However, just don't mistake crying like a baby with crying.. Babies cry because it agitates people, so they can have their needs fulfilled by other people.

  • Um no you really loved her your human. Your not crying in public. So let it out in private

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  • Crying is normal and healthy. Let it out. It does no good to keep it in. Just release it. Let it spill.

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  • Nooooooooo. cry let it out. If you need to grieve, grieve.

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  • No, why would it be? Being heartbroken about it just means it really meant something to you. There's nothing manly about being made of stone.

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  • Why the fuck do people think that men shldnt cry🤦? They're humans just like us women and have emotions, ofc if anyone cries all the damn time it's gonna get annoying tho🤷

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  • I don’t think it’s pathetic. Each person deals with certain issues in their own way. If my girlfriend broke up with me and I had loved her a lot, I wouldn’t cry but I would feel immensely sad. There are certain things I cry during and other things that, while I’ll feel immensely sad, I won’t cry. I like to think I understand myself well enough now to know what those things are. Everyone is different.

    So, in summation, no, I don’t think it’s pathetic at all to cry over being part of a breakup. It’s quite normal for someone to cry over something like that despite believing that I myself wouldn’t cry over such a thing, but again, it doesn’t mean that my emotions aren’t extreme or intense, it’s just how my body works I guess.

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  • No, ‘men don’t cry’ is just some stupid lie feed to us from a young age. Men are human, men feel pain therefore men cry

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  • First and foremost you're a human being. Being a man doesn't mean you are immune to having feelings and reacting because of them. Tears in this instance are perfectly normal.

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  • Crying is good. It allows you to process your emotions and it might even help you get over her faster

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  • Use it as an experience to toughen up. I cried one time after a 9 year relationship. Never on any of my shorter ones 1yr or less

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  • Men have emotions too. Better to let it out then to bottle it up

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  • Nah bro, crying is natural. This may sound like an insult, but it's sincere; go on and cry.

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  • I went through a break up just not long ago and i cried so hard like never before in my life, got very depressed and didn't eat anything for 36 hours long. I even had to call a working day off. I slept most of the time apart from crying.

    I loved her but she just ghosted on me and left me and then i realized she was just infatuated. We didn't even reach the one year milestone. She was my first everything.

    It's not pathetic. It's very normal to do these. But I'll have to get back up anyway because there's no other way.

    So if you do these, make sure you're alone in your room and that nobody can enter your room.

    Last but not least: We deserve better.

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  • Hope you're gonna be ok. It's normal for a male to cry, males have emotions too! 🤗🤗💕

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  • Nope. Not pathetic at all. In fact I would appreciate it if the guy who broke up with me... Cry over it. It shows how I am worth it and that I am very special to him.

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  • No. Just means you actually have feelings and care about her, unlike some one of I know.

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  • I will never think my Dean is any less of a man if he cries <3 :(

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  • I cried once, Never again. That pathetic guy's far in the past.
    I'll be more like Barney from How I Met Your Mother.

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  • Hang in there buddy , everything is going to all right.
    And about the cry thing, yes you can cry, just not in front of anyone.
    You just need a hug.

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  • Depends, I would say yes but I am not at all a fan of overly dramatic emotional displays, but as a general rule it's fine to cry

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  • Not pathetic at all. And I'm sure you've already heard this but it'll get easier over time.

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  • Not at all... we're all human!! of course if you loved her it's natural you'd be heart broken...

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  • Not at all, sometimes you just need to get it out of your system before you can move on.

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  • It's not pathetic in general. Unless it's over something very juvenile.

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  • Men cry? I thought they were aliens. 🙄

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  • Nope. Get it out of your system and you will feel better for it later.

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  • Isn't it obvious to cry if you breakup with someone you loved.

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  • Lol no.
    If one can't cry, then he has no feelings...

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  • If course it’s not pathetic, but you owe it to yourself to find out why she broke up with you

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  • We are all humans, let it out its healthy.

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  • Not at all. Let it out!

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  • Not at all.

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  • No. Humans are emotional creatures.

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  • Everyone fukcing crys man

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  • No..

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  • men shed blood not tears!

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  • Very normal.

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  • Just do it in private then it's no big deal.

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  • No it's not

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  • It’s okay baby❤️

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