Now, I'm not normally an insecure person. I'm pretty outgoing and laid-back. But this guy that I'm dating... he's definitely a chronic flirt. He says its a nervous tick, apparently everyone in his family has it and he's always been this way. But it's been hard to be in a relationship with him. I actually considered not dating him because of it. (I dated another guy who was a chronic flirt years ago and I thought "no big" then he cheated on me.) Now, this new boyfriend has always talked about loyalty and he's been cheated on before, too. I thought, 'well, okay, he can flirt but once he figures out that other people are flirting back 'for real' he'd totally back off and put the breaks on for me'. Turns out it happened two weeks ago. Some woman definitely made the moves. He tried to "reject her gently" according to him and to be "diplomatic". I've read the texts... he did reject her, but kind of threw me under the bus rather than flat out "no, I don't want to date you". He said he did it because he was feeling "insecure" about the relationship - that I was going to leave him out of the blue (we weren't even fighting at the time). He says he doesn't feel that way anymore, but I worry that that's exactly what he's going to go out and do whenever we have a fight. We talked about how it was his communication that he needed to develop because if he didn't intend to flirt with these people then that's what's coming across. He said he understood and that he'd work on it which is how the fight ended. When we were fighting about it he made several comments about how it was all this other chick's fault and that he'll never mention it again. He's not mentioned having girls come on to him lately, (he was making comments about it about every other day for a while) and I don't know if he's doing that because he actually is working on it or if he's still doing it but decided not to tell me anymore to avoid "a fight". I'm worried even asking about it will result in a new fight.
Is trust ruined?
