Is it better to talk about relationship problems with your boyfriend over text or in person?

[Anonymous]

[Jamie05rhs]

It depends on how emotionally charged it is. Texting is better sometimtif you really want to express yourself properly without worrying about hurting the other person's feelings. But, on the other hand, talking is better if you need to deliver a heartfelt message and you need them to see and hear your feelings so they can really understand the depth of what you're saying.

My rule of thumb (you may choose to agree or disagree): Texting if it's a negative or neutral communication; talking if it's a positive communication. (But obviously you can say a lot of positive things through text as well!)

[Jamie05rhs]

Thanks for the MHO.

[jabariw18]

Depends. My ex and I both got anxious in situations like that and had a mutual understanding that we could put our thoughts into words much easier if we could sit down and think about them and type them out in front of us. It is how we worked through most of our problems. However not everyone is gonna agree with that and think that you need to "man up" and do it in person. In reality that's not the case. Doing it via text because you are afraid of confrontation is a problem. Doing it via text because you can formulate your words better is a totally different think.

[Asker]

thank you so much!!

[jabariw18]

No problem, let me know if you have any other questions about it.

[Cynicaldreamer]

In person of course!
Boy, I am sure glad I was raised in a generation where when we had problems, we talked about them in person! Phone calls only if they're not available.

You do NOT discuss something as important and emotional as your relationship over text or messenger!!! Ever. It's fine to say, "We need to talk. When can I see you?" via text.

But an actual discussion about your feelings, problems, or emotions, needs to happen in person. That way you can gauge feelings and emotions.
Emotes via text are not good enough!

[Vikki98]

True

[Tomsta]

Id argue against that slightly. I myself have reall issues opening up in general. Writing it down in text form allowed me to actually construxted what i wanted to say as otherwose it wouldn't be cohesive it would big a mess of words amd tears

[Asker]

thank you so much!

[Cynicaldreamer]

@Tomsta Tom, I'm the same as you: I am much better at expressing myself via text, emails, messenger... basically any other means then in person! The introverted nature in me doesn't help either. However, the only downside to that is you cannot relay emotions as well via text compared to in person. For example, if you're furious at a person, you cannot always tell via text! Whereas in person they can see, feel, and hear how upset you are! It resonates more.

Usually what I do is rehearse to myself what I want to say. I know, that sounds stupid, but it gives me the rehearse what I want to say before I blow it, say something stupid, or forget something I feel I want to express. Better still, write down what you want to say and make them listen!

[CherryRoseChampange]

It depends on the type of couple you are. For my relationship, we communicate well either way, but for big arguments we decide text is better. We can think and absorb one another's thoughts better.

Making us respond in a more controlled manner. My parents were like that too. They argue over text. I'd just go for whatever fits your communication styles as a couple.

[SydneySentinel]

Always in person unless it's not possible or there's something you need to say immediately and "let's talk about this together later."

[happyscrappyheropup]

It depends upon circumstances.

Face to face is often preferable over text because facial and physical reactions give insight into the meaning of words.

However, reasons may make other options preferable. Anger management issues may necessitate time for things to be read and processed. Confrontation anxiety may make difficult conversations easier (because they do need to happen). Neural atypicals may not get much information from body language and may prefer non personal communication.

[KyosanshugiMajin]

It really depends. Some people communicate better through text, others over the phone, others in person. Important things should really be discussed face to face, but everyday emotional troubles can be addressed through the means in which those people are most comfortable. If two people disagree on which form of communication is best, they must either compromise or break up.

[David92506]

I agree with you. There are people who will talk your right ear off and you can't get a word in. It's better to write emails or text with these people because at least you can get your point across.

[FlirtWithMeeee]

I can tell you from experience, DEFINITELY IN PERSON. The written word can easily be misinterpreted and this like tone of voice, context, gestures etc. are lacking no matter which emoji you use. And if there is a misunderstanding is so much harder to resolve over text. So much of language (well over 50% is nonverbal).

[mattmanyah2]

In person hands down. I make a rule when I'm getting serious that either person can call for coffee and conversation. It happens at my house or her house at the dining table and the rules are vulgarity is allowed and honesty is expected. Life gets hard you need to be able to talk it through sometimes it's ugly and vulgar. It is extremely important to see body language to be able to read frustration and want. I highly suggest an honesty spot.

[Tomsta]

Id say both. Some peoplenreally struggle with opening up about something in person. Over text gives the the abiloty to do that without the fear of doing in person

Once the ice has been broken on the subject however id then start trying to do ot in person

Sometimes its not easy to find the words im person

[Secret6620]

In person. This just makes sure everything is interpreted the right way and you can gauge each other's reactions. 🟣☮️☪️

[Asker]

Thank you so much!!☺️

[Secret6620]

No probs, Lovely 🟣☮️☪️

[boggboss]

Always in person texting is not a perfect form of communication things can be interpreted wrong

[Asker]

thank you so much!!☺️

[kaylaS91]

In person.
More than half the message gets lost over text because you lose things like body language, facial expressions, tone, intonation, etc.. Which, together, are just as critical as what you actually say.

[MannMitAntworten]

Text is absolutely worst way to talk about problems! At the vert least, over the phone if not in person. Text always makes it worse.

[Asker]

Thank you so much this helps a lot!

[MannMitAntworten]

Best of luck.

[MissDawn7961]

all relationship problems should be talked about out in the opinion and with witnesses so that every one will know what was said and and it will be settled and forgive ! Thanks

[ValentinVV]

I think you should know best. If it's either super urgent or he isn't good with direct confrontation just do it over the phone. Otherwise. Just talk to him...

[broken_heart_at_48]

In person of course too many misunderstandings when texting. Unless you're afraid of him then you should have your big brother uncle or dad go end your relationship for you and don't look back

[navyP]

Always talk about problems in person never over text

[Asker]

thank you!

[Caleb103]

Agreed

[SarahsSummer]

In person of course. Text will never give you the clarity or understanding that in person communication provides.

[horsenrhinounicorn]

Text removes the emotions and tone. In person brings a better understanding. Write it on paper so you cover all things.

[Account]

I'd much rather not talk about it. It causes unnecessary conflict, it never helps, it just prolongs the inevitable. It is a lose-lose situation

[Crystal03]

Both actually, depending on how much you know about your partner. As long as you two are communicating, those problems can be solved in an instant.

[Jedipasta]

In person always without a doubt. Just remember people process things at different rates so be patient.

[Ginny418]

In person. You need to be able to communicate effectively and face to face. It's cowardly and not personal to talk through text.