My boyfriend scares me when he’s angry?

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend and I of 5 months sometimes fight and it’s not pretty. So my boyfriend is an engineer and also opening up a clinic and I’m a nurse so I know busy schedule and when I text him he replies like the next day or when I call him he doesn’t answer until few days later and I always push it off to ok he’s busy I’ll wait and it breaks my heart cause I get that your busy but damn you can’t even text me 1 word. And this is why I’m always like should I just leave him cause he seems like he doesn’t care about me then we we met once a week he seems normal and happy to see me and we have a great time but sometimes he makes me cry. I told him why you don’t put any effort is money more important for you and he was like yes that’s how am and you have to deal with it and that broke my heart and I told him then we’re over drop me off and he started driving super fast on his sports car and it scared me so much I was screaming and crying and begging him to stop because I have PTSD I had a bad car accident and he even knows it and I was having a panic attack and he said take it back and he was yelling at me and I said fine I won’t break up and then he would say STFU NOW and I would cry quietly and then he rants and rants about how I don’t appreciate his time or him and when I try to speak up he would again shut me up. He scares me and treats me like crap and he thinks he’s the perfect guy Like the other day I was at his place and I laughed at something he said about his job and he was serious but not me and he got close up and grabbed my neck and said laugh again see what happens and I know he would never hit me but he threatens me like this and ofc I cried again and he punched the wall next to me saying he hates it when I cry and he just keeps yelling at me telling me non stop to STFU and this is constant and I can’t leave him cause he scares me and I don’t want to leave him I love this idiot so much. Is this normal to be afraid of your boyfriend?

[Aysen]

To your question, yes, it is normal to feel afraid of your significant other when emotions and irrational actions are made that make a situation feel uneasy during that time. Throughout the relationship, you should feel comfortable, safe and happy with them the majority of the time! Everything you mentioned is understandable for your fear of your boyfriend's impulsive and inconsiderate actions.

He knows you had PTSD from a previous car accident you experienced, yet he drives recklessly anyways. He doesn't make any time to talk for you when you message him and instead of understanding you, he simply yells at you. He also mentioned he prioritizes money over the relationship so he is likely putting you on the back burner, which isn't healthy at all for the relationship. If he makes you feel afraid, disrespected and uncomfortable, you need to talk with him about it so you're not living in constant fear of what he'll do in the future. You deserve to be in a happy relationship like we all do and if he's not respecting your feelings and thoughts about this, it would be best to walk away and find someone who'll cherish and love you always!

Love is a powerful emotion and feeling so I can understand why you're lovestruck with him but remember that you're his significant other and it's both your jobs to ensure you both are satisfied and happy with the direction of the relationship. If one or both of you are continuously unhappy and nothing is changing, don't suffer any longer then you need to and reconsider the relationship. Hope this helps with your situation!

[Changiis07]

It's normal to be afraid but it's also normal to be blinded. You love him because you have created this image in your mind but anyone who can see the relationship knows what you are going through isn't healthy. I am no one to judge but take it from someone who had 1 boyfriend in the past he broke my phone because he was jealous I took him back because he apologized to my family, but he would get mad at other stuff. We were not good for each other. We get blinded but as I can see your relationship with him is not healthy at all. He makes you cry, he does not put you first and ignores your texts or does not call/text until the next day? what kind of relationship is that. Now what do you want in a relationship? I mean you saying that you don't think he will never hit you is wrong way of thinking. If he has gotten this far to grab your neck and to say "laugh again and see what happens" like excuse me time to walk away and put your big girl pants on. It hurts because you love him but no one should ever get treated like this. You are much to valuable and precious. Do not let his anger and you being afraind prevent you from walking away. Trust me I have been with guys that were not for me. It takes a lot of courage. Also driving fast like he did is dumb, a crash can happen and escalate so quickly. All the cussing is so disrespectful as well. Do not let anyone ever treat you this way and think it is okay or that they will change. This is why you see so much domestic violence because us woman let things slide when we know we do not deserve. Stand your ground girl do not be scared to walk away

[Nalix]

While it's normal for women to be a little afraid of men, this much a problem. (Just like it's normal for men to be frustrated and resigned with women's behavior). He is not responsible for you feeling afraid, but he is responsible for his actions. He feels that you don't appreciate his time? Try talking about that and how you can do better when he's cooled down. At the same time, it would be good to ask him to be more patient with you and for both of you to talk about what you can both do to show appreciation for each other. You both have a lot of stress to deal with, and if you're going to be a team, you need to help each other overcome that stress rather than add to it.

[Levin]

Guy is a complete psychopath.

Christ girl, have some self-respect. You're *choosing* to date scumbags like that.

[Asker]

Aw your right I have to know my worth like I once did but he took it away from me that’s it his ass is gone thanks for the tip

[chihuahua011]

Jesus girl, I know love can make a person blind af to the others flaws, but damn he is just a psychopath. I would find a way to dump him or get help to get rid of him if he is that aggressive.

[blutwolfe]

Well ya it's normal to be scared in an abusive relationship like wtf why you still in the relationship? He literally says he doesn't love you, threatens to beat you, and doesn't make time for you.

[Asker]

Your absolutely right he says I love you like it’s forced I don’t think he loves me he barely does anything and yes he’s abusive so his ass is gone

[Nonfrivolous]

you should definitely leave him