Inspired by the movie Tonight You’re Mine. (Great movie, by the way.) Yes, this happens often in fiction but I was curious to know if this has happened to anyone in real life? Obviously “enemies” is a bit of an extreme. Maybe you misjudged one another or maybe something happened that caused you to see past the initial dislike…
Yes, this has happened to me…
No, this has never happened to me…
Other (Please Explain)
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Have you ever gone from enemies-to-lovers with someone?
There was a girl in my high school who I hated! She seemed to hate me. She made fun of me all the time. I never said anything. I just tried to ignore her.
I encountered her on FB. She had changed her name and honestly if I knew it was she I would have ignored the friend request. However I accepted and she revealed who she was. We got to chatting and I found out she was bullied and abused by her father. She also confessed she had a crush on me in high school. She thought I was sweet to her (all I did was just not return the insults).
Well, it was then I thought to myself how much better it would have been to go out with her and not be insulted. Making out with her would have been soooooo much better than being mocked. She was rather attractive.
About a year later, I found out she committed suicide. She had battled depression for almost all her life. She was attractive into her 40s, by the way.
That’s very sad. I wonder if her actions towards you came out of fear of people getting close to her and finding out the truth. Not that it makes it okay for her to have treated you that way. Good on you to have ignored it and not reacted. I’m sorry to hear that she committed suicide. I hope you don’t carry the weight of any of that.
Nope, that shit is only in the movies. It's not real... Never has been real, never will be real. Well, maybe with the exception of grade school, enemies and friends happens fast in grade school. I have gone from enemies to friends. But, if he tried to kiss me I would punch the shit out of him.
I really don't remember, it was a long time ago and I would trust him with not only my life, but my kid's lives. I just got to know him. We were much younger. There was a lady I used to work with who absolutely hated the fact I even existed. She would sabotage me at work, talk bad about me to customers, everything she could do, to get me gone. This story I can tell. She would make my life miserable, she was trying to get me gone. Well, I did everything I was supposed to do. I tried to talk to her one on one to see if we could hash it out. She ran away, when I tried to confront her. So the next day, I walked into HR cold and asked to speak to a manager. I told the manager everything that was going on, as a pre-emptive measure. I told them what was happening, but asked them to be aware, but not to do anything until I talked to my manager. So I sat in front of my manager's office and told him, I wasn't going to sit in my designated area because she sat across from me. I went into his office and told him everything that went on. He called the lady in and proceeded to read her the riot act. I mean he tore her a new one. When she tried to deny it, he exclaimed, "I've heard you say it!", fortunate for me, he saw some of it. He basically told her that if she ever messed with me again in any way it would be her ass. Great! But not the end of the story. So about a year goes by we hardly interact. Then slowly she starts talking with me business stuff. A little while after that, she becomes my biggest fan and biggest advocate. A complete 180. Instead of trying to get me canned she advocated for me and defended me, even when I wasn't around. We ended up friends. Not besties, but friends enough, I wouldn't hang out with her after work or anything, but yeah it's possible to turn a super shitty situation in to a positive one. What I did, was kept a level head and did not act out of emotion. And the best possible result came out of it, an enemy became a friend.
There was this guy in our college years who disliked me so much that he spread false rumors about me. I went out of my way to ask him out on a lunch date to get him to know me. He apologized for detesting me then we became friends and tried to date again for dinner. We didn't hit it off and just remained friends.
I was originally a political rival who just kept winning anything & everything I set my sights on. I was also a party girl. And, since I was such, he figured I was loose & slutty. He later learned how deep & truly respectable my morals are.
No, I don't think so. But I did go from lover, to annoying friend, back to lover, back to good friend, lol. It was a long time ago. We were barely even compatible as friends. But he is one of my 'exes can be friends' examples.
Ok, so I know it’s not the same but this reminded me of a song that I heard about going from strangers to lovers and then strangers again. I had to google it. The song is just meh, in my opinion but I thought the lyrics were clever:
We went from strangers to lovers to strangers in a lifetime Now just memories We've gone from strangers to lovers to strangers Yeah
Acting like we never met Faking like we'd just forget we were lovers And now there's nothing left but small talk Had every inch of your skin There's nowhere your hands haven't been Ain't it funny?
Yeah, it did happen when I was much younger. It was my first experience with guys. There was a guy in my math class and we hated each other so much that we couldn't even talk to each other properly.
The teacher forced us to get along cause it was starting to get out of hand. We'd throw things at each other and call each other names etc... But we were still really good students.
And 2 years later, I had my actual first kiss and it was with that guy. It was his first kiss as well. He was never really my boyfriend but we still ended up liking each other a lot. He's still somehow special to me even if we don't talk anymore and probably never will again.
Once, briefly, then we became enemies again. I had a co-worker who was a real b*tch. I hated her guts. I believe the feeling was mutual. One day we were alone in the restaurant where we worked together and she was screaming obscenities at me because I absolutely refused to break food safety protocols to make it convenient for her and all of a sudden she gave me a funny look and then started begging me to f*ck her right then in the kitchen. She was naked before I could give her an answer. So I f*cked her and it was really hot and after she said "I still hate you, you piece of sh*t!" I said "me too." and that was that. We both quit in less than a month. She was sexy as hell and a good f*ck but the meanest nastiest person I ever met.
One of my exes was initially a bratty and dismissive bitch towards me. Does that count? I didn't appreciate her very much because of it, but then I got amused finding out she was actually harboring a crush on me.
Can't say we were ever "lovers", it was definitely not the healthiest of relationships, but we remained exclusive and "committed" for 3 years.
Eh, my perception changed largely because of things that happened that appeal to my not so well adjusted self from back then. It wasn't just the fact that she had crush on me, but that it undermined all the stances she held beforehand and that by doing so she effectively made herself subservient to my control, it validated me a lot.
She eventually fell for me properly over the course of those three years, but my attachment issues prevented me from doing the same. As I said, it wasn't very healthy.
Yes I have, but from my experience it doesn’t end well. Because there is a reason your initial feeling is of dislike towards the person. I have found it was never a misjudgment it’s red flags, and then at some point you feel lonely, or feel like you want to connect or whatever. And that enemy is there, so you start to ignore the red flags coz you want someone or some kind of feeling. Then you change your mind about them. Then eventually when you start to feel better again, less lonely, better self esteem in your life for whatever reason, you start to see the red flags again that you ignored when going though a depressive period in life, and you go back to disliking them. thats just my two cents though,
Enemies, lovers, married, back to enemies... with each other's secrets. Not a fun ride. Like a roller coaster that flies off the tracks. Just horrible. And then she calls me when she's having sex with her new boyfriend. Total mess.
Since I couldn't do anything about it I figured I might as well enjoy it... she expected me to cry or be upset. When she realized what I was doing while listening to them she got mad and hung up.
Uncommon, definitely. But like I said above, it doesn’t have to be as extreme as enemies— it could just be someone that you had total misjudgments about or vice versa.
They say that's how it happens. The one that pisses you off the most, is actually the one you love the most. Why? Probably because they are a challenge. The problem is. You're not really in to THEM, you just like the chase/challenge, that's all
Doesn't hate or waste time on considering someone enemy. If I don't like someone they won't get into my life or stay there and then is it nothing more.
The opposite of feelings for someone is indifference. Hate is investing feelings in someone or something.
Hate is a feeling that very easily can flip to love and other way around. the funny thing is that many think or say they hate when thing's didn't go as they wanted but still loves ( very common amongst female's )
“The opposite of feelings for someone is indifference. Hate is investing feelings in someone or something.” I agree. In order to hate, it requires feeling and time.
“Hate is a feeling that very easily can flip to love and other way around. the funny thing is that many think or say they hate when thing's didn't go as they wanted but still loves ( very common amongst female's )” I disagree. I don’t think hate can so easily flip to love. But I can definitely see where love can easily flip to hate.
I have. We knew each other through a couple people. She tended to insult me in front of them but the first time we were alone she kissed me. Led to a lot of fun for a few months
Nope, I very rarely make enemies but when I do, it's people I'd never want to talk to. I would rather have a flaming chainsaw shoved up my backside than even attempt a relationship with one of those people.
Mmmm I mean I’ve questioned their bi polar motives. But I never went far of developing feelings for them. That I just get away from them, cause I don’t want to be constantly hurt cause they dislike me.
I like this movie Tonight You’re Mine. The two feuding musicians are meant to play at a festival and end up handcuffed together for the whole night. Not likely to happen in real life but interesting way that they were pulled together and discovered commonalities.
The “enemies” extreme only happens in movies. But I think misjudgments and assumptions are common and sometimes worked through. I’m curious about that too.
Any relationship having enemity creates a small dent in trust and when there is dent in trust it creates doubt and doubt is a vicious creature that lurks in corners of mind and when a fight happens all the negativity and hidden truths and fears come at the same point then it unleashes a misery pain and sadness.
It might be like you can handle or win but it will get you at your lowest point
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