If your boyfriend threatened to cheat on you would you dump him?

[rachvartannn]

Hi all, so I (26F) pushed my boyfriend's buttons today (24M) over something that was admittedly stupid but in the moment it did not seem like it to me of course we were talking about daisy duke shorts and he said he likes them I was saying I can't wait to be back in my best shape soon and wear all the ones I have, I thought he was trying to put me down and say he likes them and can't picture me in them and said "I'm sure i would like you in them" and I can be nitpicky I admit sometimes but that is not the point, the point is, I pushed his buttons because I grilled him over what he said, and one thing led to another and he got on the topic of my ex and how it gave me trust issues and he was like "I've said a lot of nasty shit to you, I don't know why you're still here, I don't know why you're not paranoid of me" and I said "what the heck, SHOULD I be paranoid you're going to cheat on me too?" and he said "I'm about to". literally not even a second later he probably realized how disgusting he made himself look and said "I'm not actually about to I'm just saying that cus Im tired of you I want to get you away from me" whenever he gets mad he breaks up with me for a day or two and then doesn't consider it a breakup and calls me up like nothing happened or says "sorry". I already know he is going to call me later tonight most likely and try to say I didn't mean it. It drives me insane and makes me feel psycho when he acts like he loves me one second then the second he is ticked off, talks to me like this. Would you guys dump him? What do you think about this guy? I already know my jealous comment about the shorts was stupid so spare me, we are all human and make mistakes, but his comment about "I'm about to (cheat on me)" was SO over the top. Also, I am getting the vibe from things he has said that when his family (who is all divorced) is mad at each other they say whatever they want to each other and it's ok to him cus if he is mad when he says it doesn't count.

[Shy80sgirl]

Bye bye would be my reaction. I am not in super model shape whatsoever, and my husband would never talk to me in that manner. The fact that he even considers cheating on you in a sentence is a giant red flag in my book.

[sheikalana]

I would leave him for good LOL. what kind of person threatens to cheat on their partner. red flag alert big time.

[rachvartannn]

Totally agree what a disgusting thing to say to someone I’ve noticed every time he gets mad he says meaner shit and I’ve noticed this is how his family is to each other I think he’s just dysfunctional cus that is not ok

[sheikalana]

what a shitty person. you deserve so much better than this.

[rachvartannn]

thank you so much for that. I also left this comment for someone else on here, but today for example : LOL! so here's the kicker. today for example he was on the phone while doing his job for deliveries and he was like screaming at his seatbelt and the van for not working properly like just being angry because he was being slowed down and he was like 'what the hell motherfucker why are you driving like such a fucking idiot' and he does this many times a day when he is on the phone w me and driving and he will be like "WHY ARE YOU SLAMMING ON YOUR BRAKES YOU DUMBASS" and yell at other cars to himself like wtf lol. like no joke sometimes it happens multple times in a day or conversation he's done that like twenty times and I tell him to relax and chill like I will say its ok people are dumb, just drive safe and he will be like "no the reason im not chill is you, you're my problem" so if he is mad at me he will blame me for HIS nasty behavior and demeanor like no, you have a short fuse naturally stop blaming it on me.

[sheikalana]

my dear this is not normal. you need to leave him I understand you love him but come on so many red flags for what? you already know he’s not good for you don’t delay this much longer.

[abc3643]

Absolutely!
That's the instant you know that he's an immature douche.
Just before dumping him, say something like "I want to thank you for self-identifying as an immature man-child. Buh-bye!"

[Finchie40]

It sounds like you need to end that relationship right now , what kind of toxic shit is that lol

[rachvartannn]

LOL! so here's the kicker. today for example he was on the phone while doing his job for deliveries and he was like screaming at his seatbelt and the van for not working properly like just being angry because he was being slowed down and he was like 'what the hell motherfucker why are you driving like such a fucking idiot' and he does this many times a day when he is on the phone w me and driving and he will be like "WHY ARE YOU SLAMMING ON YOUR BRAKES YOU DUMBASS" and yell at other cars to himself like wtf lol. like no joke sometimes it happens multple times in a day or conversation he's done that like twenty times and I tell him to relax and chill like I will say its ok people are dumb, just drive safe and he will be like "no the reason im not chill is you, you're my problem" so if he is mad at me he will blame me for HIS nasty behavior and demeanor like no, you have a short fuse naturally stop blaming it on me.

[Finchie40]

Yea that sounds toxic and sounds like he has issues , you are probably best to get away from him only for the simple fact he attacks you , that is not a healthy relationship what so ever and you should t tolerate that abuse what so ever

[rachvartannn]

I would super appreciate your opinion on my latest q from yesterday, you are right though I have only recently started thinking I may need to pull the plug cus people dont just change and im not perfect either but i resolve things maturely and do not treat him like trash, his behavior gets worse over time cus i have let him get away with it by staying. sounds like he may have a narcisisst disorder?

[Finchie40]

It definitely sounds it to me , look at it this way you would t be asking this question if you weren’t to concerned , that’s your answer right there

[ThatguyDon]

next time he wants you away from him, give him the space, like a lot of space and block him out for a good amount of time. He'll come crawling back begging and you will have won control of your relationship by letting him know if he does that shit again, next time it may be a real long time until he sees you again.
or you can just sit down and have a heart to heart talk with him about your relationship? :)

[sdsalyer1979]

Girl! I’m not trying to be malicious but have some self respect! This guy is literally showing you his cards and you aren’t believing him. Gets to steppin!

[rachvartannn]

No I completely agree

[SnakeBoop]

yeah nah, thats a end it comment.
if he even says it anger, even if not meaning to, he said it to HURT you.

[rabbitzzz]

Do you want to dump him when you are young, independent and have lots of options.
Or when you are old with two children and have to listen to that whenever you step out of the line. But you depend on him and have nowhere to go.

[rachvartannn]

this was very eye opening. if you read my other q's from the last few days it is obvious he is an abusive asshole (emotionally) but because he love bombed me at first and presented himself as so obsessed with me and sweet it is hard to break, but now i see the real him I think that it is during moments like this when things are NOT all rainbows and sunshine that someones true self is revealed. you are so right. I am 26, I am in nursing school and getting in amazing shape I have so many options and I doubt he will change, and why would I want to be w someone who threatens to cheat on me rather than say "i would never do that to you". im beyond disgusted w him. he actually wants me to move in with him in march, yeah right.

[CallmeTheKnight]

Both of you are morons honestly. You pushed his buttons and he said that as retaliation. Just end that retarded relationship now before you this crap happens again.

[rachvartannn]

you couldnt post without being insulting? that makes you the real moron. I was just being dumb, we all do it sometimes, even you with your god complex, but I do agree it is retarded.

[SmokyOne]

Is this like a middle school relationship? Doesn't sound like either of you are making mature decisions here.. Maybe you should break up and find yourselves first.

[rachvartannn]

I mean people aren’t perfect lol but what I said wasn’t a big deal and didn’t warrant his reaction I’m not the problem it’s how he reacts and communicates when he’s mad and it is indeed akin to a middle schooler

[SmokyOne]

If he had said this as a one off thing then sure you can say people aren't perfect. However based on what you wrote this is an established pattern of behavior. Saying shit like "I'm tired of you" like you're a thing to be cast aside, and breaking up whenever he's mad? Yea guy isn't ready to be in a relationship and frankly sounds hella spoiled.

[rachvartannn]

Totally agree that’s not ok especially cus it’s a pattern

[NorthAfrican]

Looks like you guys are incompatible and it's a toxic relationship.
I would person break up.

[Anonymous]

I don't need to read a single word from your description.
I would dump such a partner. Not a question.

[PrettyPriya]

I would dump him before he finished the sentence.

[Guy13]

No offense but you may want to consult a GP for an "insomnia" script... WOW !

[rachvartannn]

not sure what you mean lol.

[Guy13]

There you go…. show your post to your GP and he’ll take it from there🙃 💊 💊 💊 🙃

[rachvartannn]

You’re dumb

[dudeinohio]

Yes I'd dump someone like that

[genericname85]

yup. absolutely.

[DeeMB]

If he threatened to, he prolly already has

[rachvartannn]

I mean he’s really not that type to be honest and to be fair I’ve threatened it too but a year ago and realized it was immature and worked on my communication skills the fact he said it even if he didn’t mean it was so messed up cus it was intended to hurt me and that’s red flag enough lol

[jahaims]

Obviously