Did she ever loved me?

Jo575
Okay girls first of all I'm a trans guy okay?
I met someone and she was actually a close friend to all of my family members
She didn't notice that I'm trans until I told her but just because my family are transphobic she kept talking with me with the wrong pronouns and the dead name
Anyways, We kept getting closer we started to share room then to share bed
We kissed sometimes, We were making each other's life better
We've dealt with her illness as no one did we were perfect for each other
But unfortunately we never said anything about our feelings or we never talk seriously about it
The question is :
Did she ever love me? I mean do u (girls) deal with your friends (especially girls because she was dealing with me as I'm a girl )?
And there is another note : She was older than me about 5 years
Does anything make a sense? I can't understand the situation till now actually
Did she ever loved me?
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