📌cook and clean very well. 📌take good care of herself. 📌 take great care of the kids or pets that she has with you. 📌 handle the conflict she has with you or others calmly and rationally without yelling. 📌always speak in a calm tone. 📌 hold great conversations with you. 📌respect you. 📌get along with you and all the people in your life. 📌be affectionate with you and enjoy it. 📌help you out when you need her to and be there for you no matter what.🙂
Tis True.
Tis false.
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Guys, who are into only biological women, is it true or false that you basically want a woman who can?
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- Cook and clean very well. ✔ - Take good care of herself. ✔ - Take great care of the kids or pets that she has with you. ✔ - Handle the conflict she has with you or others calmly and rationally without yelling. ✔ - Always speak in a calm tone. ✔ - Hold great conversations with you. ✔ - Respect you. ✔ - Get along with you and all the people in your life. ✔ - Be affectionate with you and enjoy it. ✔ - Help you out when you need her to and be there for you no matter what. ✔
Yes. And women claim they can't understand men. Although men won't make a literal checklist out of it (that's something mostly women do), all of these things are what most men look for in a woman. And worse yet, MOST MODERN WOMEN CANNOT DO EVEN HALF OF THESE THINGS!
SOME AMENDMENTS TO ADD ON: - Has a sense of humor - Has class and self-respect (as in, not a slut or promiscuous) - "Is intelligent" - "Is 100% all-natural female" - "Monogamous" - "100% Heterosexual" (not gay, or any of the hundred different synonyms for it, like "bi" or "heteroflexible"; that sh*t is disgusting)
Add those to that list and you've legitimately got the perfect woman. And speaking for me, as long as she was biologically female, straight, and monogamous, I wouldn't even care much about her looks if she possessed everything else. Just look feminine and presentable.
Yes; but she doesn't have to cook and clean well, necessarily. Because I don't see that as being her job. I don't believe in gender roles. I believe that household chores should be shared equally by both partners.
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15 Reply
Asker
1 y
yes but i mean you wouldn't be with a women who can't cook or clean at all and who isn't willing to would you?
@Asker If she isn't willing to clean, then no. Because I can't do it all myself. That would be exhausting. Cleaning sucks; that's why it's great to work together as partners so you can get it done faster and easier. (Plus the camaraderie aspect.)
As far as cooking goes, though, that wouldn't bother me so much, because I'm already a good cook and I enjoy doing it. If she cooks as well, fantastic! If not, no big deal.
if she can't cook it's a red flag wanna know why? because cooking is a basic survival technique any adult who can't cook is very suspicious, like cooking is sooo easy and there's an abundant supply of videos and books on it. I know deep down you'd like for a woman your into to spoil you with a great meal that you didn't even have to lift a finger on making from time to time, sometimes it's awesome when our partners take the load off us, do all the work and less us chill y'know... it's only natural.
It's like i enjoy cleaning but its always nice when someone pitches in and cleans so that i can catch up on my reading... isn't that what being in a couple is all about it's about working together and taking the load off from one another from time to time, if one partner always cooks it's going to be soo special when the one who never cooks is like, i'll cook today! stuff like that..
@Asker Well, these are personal conversations that should be had between two people who are actually interested in dating one another. No use in both of us wasting our time giving detailed opinions here to absolute strangers. Lol. Unless you're American and single. I'm which case feel free to send me a message haha.
For the record, I just want to say that No, I don't think a woman not being able to cook is a red flag. Not at all. That's just not something that I would judge a girl on. It's not important to me. (Now, if she CAN cook? Wonderful. Of course I will appreciate her talents.)
I hear you loud and clear, but for me I am definitely not dating a guy who cannot cook that is a huge red flag I see being able to cook as being a part of self care... for me if you are a human over 25 and you cannot cook then you are playing around, you are not taking yourself seriously. if you're rich and have private chefs and people doing everything for you and that's your reason for not being able to cook then it's understandable, if you can't cook due to a disability or illness then i completely understand and if you were never able to afford to learn how to cook because of your environment then i completely understand but i am not sympathizing with the rest. cooking is literally so easy so i fail to understand why a person who is 25 and above can't do it.
1) Knowing how to cook is a basic human skill for survival. Everyone needs to know how to do it to an extent. You don’t have to be a chef, but you should be able to make a handful of meals that are tasty. I personally enjoy cooking, but no one wants to work all day long and then come home and cook every night. So both people having some skills in the kitchen is ideal. Sometimes one person carries the load when the other is exhausted, and other times the other does the job. More often than not, both people cook together. One preparing the meal and the other playing sous-chef to help them out prepping ingredients over conversation.
Things being clean is nice, but I’m no clean freak. Women generally are more anal about cleaning than men. Thus it’s more important that she is tolerant and easy going when it comes to cleaning up. If she loves to clean and does it on her own and that doesn’t bother her, fine more power to her. That said I don’t expect her to always clean up after me... If she nags about things getting dirty or disorganized there is where conflict festers. Personally I have my own schedule for cleaning things up to my own standards and my own set of idiosyncrasies. If that doesn’t bother her and she has patience to let that happen own my schedule, or is willing to do the job on her own without getting jaded over it then that is good. Being down to earth and not stressing is the most important trait when it comes to cleaning.
2) Being healthy is good if that is what you mean by take good care of herself. That could probably be interpreted in several different ways. Some might be positives, others might be negatives.
3) Being good with children and animals is a positive.
4) Handling conflict with civility sound good. Crazy girls that yell at you, hit you, or plot against you don’t get taken seriously…
5) Nope, variations of emotion is good. Automaton robots are no fun.
6) Conversation is always a big one in relationships. Common interests, similar since of humor, intellectual stimulation, and even silence all play a role.
7) Respecting one another is a basic necessity.
8) If I didn’t get along with her I wouldn’t spend time with her. That said, she doesn’t have to like everyone in my life.
9) Yep, authentic affection is a basic requirement. You’ve got to be real. Quality time and intimacy are important
10) I can’t disagree with the last one. Acts of service speak louder than words. Being dependable and loyal is a necessary.
There’s a lot more to what makes a quality woman than what you mentioned, but some of those traits are a good foundation.
I can clean and cook for myself. So it would be more of a case of shared responsibility. I have two pet rabbits and taking care of them daily is already a part of my rotten, also it's part of my morning schedule. So more then likely I'd already have their litter box cleaned and given them new hay and greens in the morning before she got the chance to do so. Having kids is still not something I'm not committed to. As for respect. Anything related to respect comes down to a rule of life: It should always be earned and never freele given. Also when you start losing my respect I can quickly become done with a person and simply cut them off.
As for her getting along with people I'm close to. Well more then likely I could scare her off and so would the people I'm close to. Frankly if being around a bunch of metal heads and bikers would scare you or you would have an issue with them, it's best we avoid each other. Because myself and the people I'm close to have no intent of changing and we all simply don't care if people have an issue with us. Also we don't take crap from people.
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1 Reply
Asker
1 y
alright i totally hear ya there!. so what do you want from a woman then?
I mean kinda the cooking and cleaning isn't really a big deal so long as ya know she's not super slob lol and I can't stand stuck up people either but affectionate is a yes as for conflict I expect her to try to act retionally but If we ever got in an argument over something serious I could totally get if she was upset and I'd try my best to resolve said issue help me out? Well I expect her to be by my side but I am not a man to ask for handouts from my love and I certainly want to burden her in anyway after all she is her own person respect should just be common ground in general lol get along with friends and family isn't necessary just act civil to the best of her abilities if she doesn't like them taking care of one self Is a must and taking of kids or pets Is Team effort this isn't the 1940s xD but I would expect to actually ya know be good to the kids and do her part overall hold great conversations is nice but like again it's a team effort one person can't be doing everything lol I think like that I could say that's my ideal situation but I feel affection cuddly bubbly girls are my weakness xD
take great care of the kids or pets that she has with you.✅
handle the conflict she has with you or others calmly and rationally without yelling. ⚠️
Not-so-sure about this. Depends whether we’re trying to irritate you you intentionally or are we really emotional in that situation. Well in a situation where we’re trying to irritate you, we’d love some yelling and a smile right when you yell (you’ll soon see the guy happy and laighing when you smile or laugh immediately after or during yelling). It’s like ‘YES I DID IT! I IRRITATED HER!’ In a seriously situation, we’d want you to be supporting and snuggly. We’d want a hug and we’ll be okay. If you wanna continue an argument, argue while you smile, whether you yell or not, it’s your choice. We’d like it either way but you should just be smiling.
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always speak in a calm tone.❌
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hold great conversations with you.✅✅✅✅✅
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respect you. ✅
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get along with you ✅ and all the people in your life. ❌
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be affectionate with you and enjoy it. ✅
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help you out when you need her to and be there for you no matter what. ✅
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Reasonsn are listed here, they were too long so I couldn’t Post it here 😅
I expect all of that of myself. Even though I don't have a woman. Some of those are no brainers like take good care of my/herself. The most important one I see there is respect. Respect is not something you give. It is something you have. It is displayed by you. It will show in everything one does. It will effect all the rest.
What I mostly want and found horribly lacking is the helping. Or to be more exact just some one who supports, understands, forgives and encourages. For example. When some one comes home and slams things down on the table because frustration has the best of them, do they take it personally and add to the frustration or just hug them and let them know when they are ready to talk the ear is open. I have been the calm rain on several occasions. But the one time I am at my wits end, she lights on fire too, escalating the tension when I am at my worst to deal kindly with it.
I hear ya, I think being single can be a good thing as well too bad though that society like s making it seem like being single is a crime, but I hear you I will consider making a list for men but let me tell you i feel like most girls will disagree with the list I make about men 😹
she doesn't have to be a great cook i like cooking, so i would love to take that chore. she could take other things in return. and also i don't expect her to be "great" in all those other aspects you mentioned. "good" is good enough for me. i don't expect someone to be great at everything at all times.
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4 Reply
Asker
1 y
i say great because i know a person who can clean but their cleaning is 50 percent and not a 100. So i think a 100 percent is great in certain areas but that's just my view.
Pretty much... but none of that matters anymore because the ship has sailed for most men long ago. The problem is that a lot of women are excellent shape shifters and will very convincingly become all of those things until they have get what they want. Then you have the ones that are really like that having to convince a man she is real because all of the others he met weren't. Therefore I'd say it no longer matters because it's game over for relationships.
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1 Reply
Asker
1 y
you are right finding a woman with the qualities i listed is like finding gold at a dumpsite it's hard, so lets just be single if we cannot find proper women, its much better to be alone than to be with a horrible partner.
I would expect anybody who is in a relationship to seek same/similar qualities within the couple themselves. Does it matter if it is a woman doing all of those things or the man? Many of those qualities are truly within all people. So what point are you trying to make by highlighting women in this capacity then asking men? Looks to me like you're wanting to find some "misogynists" to shame. Stop.
Of note, there is only one kind of woman. A dude who tucks his wee wee in his crack, wears makeup, and now calls themself Erica instead of Eric is NOT a woman. So you can drop the whole "biological" theatrics. You're only serving to degrade women.
Hope your soul searching goes well. Don't stop seeking professional help.
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0 Reply
Anonymous
(25-29)
1 y
[Suspicious title intensifies]
No. We want a genuine people who aren't fake. I imagine you're trying to play the "I can do all these things, so what's the difference" card. Those things are nice, yes; but we don't expect any of these things. Some of these don't even make sense;
"always speak in a calm tone" why? They'e humans too,. Speaking with excitement isn't calm for instance
"handle the conflict she has with you or others calmly and rationally without yelling" If she doesn't yell, something's not right. Also, we don't want a doormat.
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2 Reply
Asker
1 y
yelling is a form of abuse fyi, and obviously by calm tone i meant even when she's experiencing negative emotions she is not gonna lose control towards you...
Interesting. If a potential girlfriend wanted to get know me, I would rephrase her question as "rank these qualities, and why / justify!" That would be fun. Since this site is about sharing, I would say have a great conversation, and if we disagree, let's have some fun talking about it! Things like that build true intimacy. (That intimacy word means way more than being comfortable unclothed in front of your partner"... Just like passion is way more loaded than the obvious first meaning...)
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