When men cheat do they downgrade or upgrade?

[lizchill]

Downgrade

Upgrade

Same

[DaveJord]

I would not say that men that cheat are not downgrading or upgrading, I do not think they look at it that way. They're looking for something they are not getting from their current relationship, and they are hoping to get it from someone else. Every guy has a range of what they deem to be acceptable as far as looks, relationship material, and fuck ability. SO ay women within that range is not upgrading or down down grading, its about being happy and fulfilled. There is a low end and up end to the that scale, but if varies for every guy. But most the time guys start out in a relationship looking for some thing, and as the relationship progresses they start to think that in the long term maybe this is not the right relationship, and they start considering alternatives. They might down grade in one area but upgrade in another. It all depends on the guy, and what he is really looking for.

Then there are the guys that live by the the mantra that if you can not be with the one you want, then love the one you have. Which means if you are dating someone and getting some of the things they want out of that then, its better then nothing. They date the women they are currently with, until they think there is a chance for something better... these are the types that will upgrade if they can, but that is always the risk... you think its upgrade, but it could end up being a down grade, and by the time they figure it out they have blown it with the women they had.

Then there the types that see and opportunity with women that they they never thought they could land and they go for it... no matter who they are dating. They are not looking to up grade or down grade... but will chase any opportunity to score.

Then there are the guys that started out with a women and really believed she was the one, and she turns out to be the completely wrong person... so any one else ends up being an up grade... no matter who they are.

Then there are the guys that just are not getting the emotional fulfillment out of the relationship they have and when they get any attention from women, they respond to it. Even though they would rather get that from their current girlfriend, they just start to feel that she will never give it to them. Again its about upgrading in one area and maybe down grading in another... these guys are just more concerned about their peace of mind and over all happiness... all they really know is that their current SO is not making them happy and probably never will.

[UnknownSwede]

They burn bridges. Because the one they cheat with probably won't see them as someone they want to be in a relationship with.

at least personally, if someone is cheating on their partner to be with me, I would have a hard time imagine that they would stay faithful to me when they couldn't do that with the pervious person.

Sure there are those that are in very unhealthy relationships and it might take meeting someone new to get them to take that step to leave their toxic relationship and in that case it would be an upgrade.

[Anonymous]

It depends. It depends on what you mean by "upgrade" and "downgrade." What are you using to grade somebody? Looks? Personality? Moral values?

I've seen men cheat on their faithful and loving wives with a morally deficit woman who willingly wants a married man. Personality-wise, that's probably a "downgrade."

I've seen men who are being treated badly by whoever they're with, cheat with a girl they liked better. For them, they are looking for someone who treats them better and who they like better, so to them it's an "upgrade".

I've seen men cheat on the most beautiful women with less attractive women. Some of the most stunning girls I've known have been cheated on, so that's a "downgrade" on looks.

But I've also seen it the other way around, where the man stays with a woman he isn't that into looks-wise until he finds his "perfect type", and "upgrades." It's messed up, but it happens.

So there's no real answer to this because people cheat for different reasons. But ultimately, it's the responsibility of the cheater to end the relationship if he's looking to stray for one of the above reasons. If you're not happy, end it. Don't look to have your cake and eat it too, it's very selfish and all parties involved get hurt.

[shaysh87]

Men cheat because they're with a partner that does not fulfill them. For example , if your wife is not affectionate , supportive or having sex with you, then he might cheat on her with a woman who would give him these things. It does not necessarily mean that he no longer loves his wife anymore. If he didn't love her, he would've divorced her long ago. It does not necessarily mean the new woman in his wife is better. It just means that this new woman is offering him something that his wife is not or is unwilling to offer him.

A successful marriage is about sacrifice, effort, compromise, problem solving and dedication. There are a lot of married women out there who think marriage is all about marrying the right person and then everything else will fall into place. It doesn't work that way.

[Cynicaldreamer]

Well I see it this way:

No matter how attractive or unattractive said person is, I see her as a downgrade if the guy is despicable enough to cheat on someone to be with her.

[Pinay_ako]

🤣. Why pick up a rock when you have a diamond at home? But his 🍆 says otherwise.

[Anonymous]

Doesn’t matter. Years ago I remember Arnold Schwarzenegger knocked up his house maid and ended up with a love child (thankfully he supported his son).

She wasn’t exactly a super model in any way shape or form. You think if you cheat you would at least:

1) be tempted by someone very attractive

2) wrap it (way to go on that one Arnold)

Anyway not to make up excuses for guys but women really do tempt and enable cheating when they see taken men as more attractive (when all else is equal).

Whenever I got in a relationship other women just came out do the woodworks. It was insane. I was like “where the hell were you when I was single”.

Again that’s no excuse for a guy to cheat. But really there is this asinine female mental quirk where women find taken men more attractive then single ones when seriously all else is equal. Just because he has a girlfriend or is married doesn’t mean he’s a higher quality guy.

[Sofi-a1997]

Usually, it's with someone less attractive. I don't know why, though. But usually (not always) the other woman is less attractive than the woman he's with. It's a weird phenomenon.

For instance, Shania Twain was cheated on by her husband with her best-friend/manager at the time. Look at Shania Twain, and look at the "bestie"

And this isn't a one-off either. Most cases I've seen of cheating, the other woman is less attractive than the woman he's with. But maybe it's an upgrade in personality or compatibility? Or a downgrade in both. Who knows.

[Screenwriter]

Don't you think it's according to the man?

Some men want to slum.

Others think they deserve someone better than whoever they have.

The last group isn't interested in upward or downward mobility. Just looking to dip the wick elsewhere.

[ObscuredBeyond]

They think it's an upgrade at the time, as do women when they cheat. But that's just your genitals and ego talking. Cheating degrades all three: the cheater, the accessory, and the victim are all degraded by it. And if there's more than one accessory, then the cheater is a full blown manipulator. Everyone being manipulated is in danger, and needs to get away from that toxic sleaze, lest defilement become the least of their worries!

[Rosexøxø]

Mmm tough one.

I wanna say…

upgrade sexually. Downgrade in compatibility. Even if they did have similar objectives..

The girl who loved him and spent more time with him, was more compatible or understanding, at the very least.

[Rosexøxø]

Of course then there are exceptions and such.

[MrOracle]

It could be any of those, because when men are looking for just casual sex (and that's generally what a side chick is), all that matters is that she's physically attractive ENOUGH, and that she's willing. If he's willing to sleep with a 5/10 or above, then she could be a 5, a 7, or a 9, and it really doesn't make a lot of difference - he's not looking for a relationship with her, so as long as she meets the minimum threshold, that's all that counts.

[Bethany22]

I've heard that they have an affair with ugly women because they're less risky or because it's just the sex urge that they want to fix. But of course we always worry that it would be too tempting for them to pass up a hotter girl who wants them. Which makes you feel better? Upgrade or downgrade?

[hyperben]

I dont think its about upgrading or downgrading, most of the time its about having something different in your life, something new and exciting.

For women who cheat, is it upgrade/downgrade? I read something years ago, "men are like bluetooth, they connect to the nearest compatible device, women are like wifi, they connect to the strongest compatible device" always made me smile!

[rienna888]

They cheat with whoever is convenient lol. I believe that they downgrade for hookups and upgrade for emotional. They cheat because they’re searching for better, trying to make their partner jealous, their partners cheated first, they’re hurt by their partners (feel like their partners are nice to them or give them enough attention, horny, variety, wants to live life to his fullest (but does not care about hurting others, etc.

[aquamarine321]

Men don’t cheat the same reason/s women cheat, plus it never involves upgrading or downgrading it’s all about the individual, that’s why men who cheat especially married men with another women is looking for the qualities he wants in his wife/girlfriend but will never get , so it’s not always about the looks but also a peace of mind and a woman who is demon in bed and lady in the streets, which many gfs and wives will not do or stop doing as soon as they get comfortable in the relationship

[aquamarine321]

Men don’t ask for much, and it’s not difficult to please a man , plus I always hear females say it’s a downgrade and how he has a diamond and this and that at home and left for another women on the streets, females fails to stop think about themselves and ask truly why did he left you for another woman and it’s not because he can’t control his dick or penis , but as yourself why do animals stray and leave from one place to another, because they aren’t getting something they want or need, plus y’all females don’t listen to your men, it’s a always about you but not him, you want him to try you like this and you’re not doing the same, men have feelings need and wants too to be loved and appreciated, , any females that can do this all the time will never have a cheating man

[bamesjond0069]

Doesn't matter. Men cheat by placing their dick in whatever hole is available and on a person attractive enough to make him hard. It's that simple. Generally that means slots. A girl who puts out fast to a taken man is low quality so generally it's a down grade. But not always. We don't know who his girlfriend is or maybe the girl he cheated with doesn't know he's taken etc etc.

[TallAnon]

Life is never that clear cut, lmao.
When is someone an upgrade or downgrade? That's super subjective.
Then you're talking general enough for statistics to come into play, which means there's a distribution of answers that can trend fo either yes, no or, as in this case, chaos.

[DenizLikesTennis]

Depends what type of male that dude is

If it is a beta male nice guy, then that'd be a huge upgrade

If it is an alpha male bad boy... well it doesn't matter... stays the same.

[sage2021]

They downgrade. I remember me telling my cheating husband that at least he could have been with someone classier than that chick. She was not all that!!

[lookingeverywhere]

They always upgrade, cause they learn new tricks to keep you happy girl. Never forget that. Get your man some more vagina. I also always let my wife hava another penis, because the next time I have her, It's always better. The way she learns to work my penis with her vagina is incredible.

[ManOnFire]

Interesting question. Cuz I notice a lot of times that the types of women a guy cheats with seem to be less attractive than their own gfs/wives. It could be that Madonna-whore complex.

[Mess96]

I’ve noticed that too and I’ve gotten bs for saying that. I don’t understand it though. Why go for someone less attractive?

[ManOnFire]

@Mess96 I think it's that thing with some guys where they're only attracted to some women even if they're not good-looking, only because they know she's a slut or gives head or seems the type to be good in bed. And she may really be all of these things, and so the guy will cheat with a woman like that for those sexual reasons. Now that's the case for SEXUAL reasons, and if she's not good-looking he will still cheat. But if the guy is cheating because he's lost interest in his girlfriend/wife in his heart, he will cheat with a woman who is still attractive. Or at least, what's attractive to him.

[Mess96]

Wow! It’s messed up though. All cheating in general is, no matter who does it. I’ve never been able to understand it

[ManOnFire]

@Mess96 I can't understand it either. And the things that go on in people's heads to make them want to cheat are things sometimes I wish I didn't know.

[Mess96]

Like wanting more sex than they get?

[ManOnFire]

@Mess96 Mmmmm. Maybe not exactly wanting MORE, but wanting a kind of sex they might not be getting from their partners. Maybe a guy's wife can't deepthroat, but the unattractive broad on his job can, and when he finds out then he wants to be the next one swallowed whole by her somewhere hidden at work or after they both get off. Or she's okay with anal sex and his wife isn't but it's something he's reeeeeally into and has to have it.

BUT, it's not just men. Women too will cheat for downright sexual reasons. She wants to be eaten but her man isn't into it or does it poorly, so she'll get it from the smooth dude on her job too. Or she wants HARDER sex but her man is just too 'vanilla' in bed, so the store associate she started talking to at Target or some unlikely place is a good flirt and she can tell he's virile, so she'll hook up with him and get the good hard sex she wanted.

This is one reason why I say when two people meet and start dating, they need to make sure they're going to be sexually compatible. Because later on when the romantic honeymoon phase ends, problems can pop up where one or both partners starts really wanting that thing in sex that they've always wanted or had in a past partner, but can't get with their current lover, and then they get itching to cheat.

[Mess96]

That’s a good point. But how do people find out if they’re sexually compatible with someone if they wanna wait until marriage or something like that? I tend to wonder that

[ManOnFire]

@Mess96 Yeah, that's definitely the challenge of it. Would be hard to know. That being the case, it's probably why we're SUPPOSED to wait till marriage.

[TrueConfection]

Downgrade! The wife must be a pretty awful person if a bimbo willing to spread her legs for a married man is somehow an "upgrade".

[qwert1234]

Looks downgrade in everyone's eyes because the person did a bad thing.

Upgrade for his/her part because she would probably not have cheated if he/she is satisfied.