At what point in a new relationship do you feel that this is the ONE you want to spend a lifetime with or get married to?

[Nimsay]

Especially for guys! I think starting a new relationship is always very fuzzy buzzy, and cozy. You talk a lott in the beginning out of curiosity and excitement. But then it fades down after 2-4 months and a stable stage is reached where you focus with the work and life around you and your girlfriend/boyfriend becomes "a part" of your life.

Do you feel the rush feelings fade at this point?

How do you decide if you want to stay with this person or split up?

How do you know if HE or SHE is the ONE?

Because I think the initial stage doesn't remains forever right?

[TheSpaceGnome]

I don't have that perception of it.

The initial stage is full of nervousness, fear, dread.

Can I trust her? does she like me? does she like the hobbies and interests I like? does she have the same preferences in lifestyle and goals? Is she lying about anything? Does she have any infections? Does she sleep around? Will she cheat? Does she have hidden kids? Does she want kids? because I don't.

So many questions, so many unknowns, so many threats to my happiness that might exist woth her, I don't get a rush from this, i get panic.

To me the excitement starts after all the questions are answered, trust is earned, compatibility is found, and you reach the point where just being yourself has them fitting right in, like she's my brain in a woman's body and we do everything together, and thats how I know she's "the one".

The initial stage is trash, the "a part of your life" stage is bliss.

[Nimsay]

these questions are a part of courtship, when you aren't in a relationship or when you haven't confessed your feelings to one another. That's a part of understanding each other when you see if you can get into a relationship with someone! No?

[TheSpaceGnome]

Yes, from your question you are talking about courtship vs being a couple, no?

[Nimsay]

Nope. I am talking about when you already are in a relationship and if think of it in a long-run way or a temporary relationship or a leading-to-marriage relationship.

[TheSpaceGnome]

I'm not sure what you mean then. But it sounds like the "part of your life" state happens for me before I date her.

If I reached the point of dating her, I've already got her completely figured out, there isn't any curiosity left because she was already my best friend for years, otherwise I don't trust her enough/know her well enough to date her.

Any excitement at the start of dating is just sexual (which doesn't ever fade for me), and knowing her completely/having nothing left to ask about her Iand liking all the answers), is what makes me agree to date her in the first place.

[BJP21]

Its when every single day feels like the initial stage.