I opened up to my boyfriend and now I feel kind of sad?

[Anonymous]

Last night me and my boyfriend had a small argument which then lead to us having a bit of a deeper chat. We’re only 6 months into our relationship so we’re just getting into the deeper conversations I guess.

This is my first actual healthy relationship and I really struggle to be vulnerable but I know if I’m going to make this work I need to be open with my boyfriend.

Anyway I opened up last night and said that my previous experiences and that of other people in my life , has made it hard for me to believe that relationships and love are real and long lasting and not just made up ideals. I told him I have a generally pessimistic view on things like that but I said that I wanted to believe in it and I wanted it all to be real but that I’d believe it when I saw it. (These were general comments not about our relationship) he just replied saying ‘I know what you mean’.

I don’t know what it was but my heart just sank a bit. I guess I wanted him to tell me something that would restore my faith a bit or make me feel like it would be different with us? And I also feel stupid for being so open and vulnerable.

I think I love him which makes how I feel even scarier but I don’t know if he’s there yet and I don’t know how if it would mess things up if I told him now.

Any advice on how to process a how I’m feeling is greatly appreciated. Do we need to talk more about what I said last night to him?

[Guy13]

Guys are not emotional but women are. One a guy has physical experiences then he starts opening up emotionally. Women are the opposite. It is life so we have to work around those absolutes in our communications.

[CubsterShura]

I think you should let him know that you would like to get some reassurance from him, explaining since it is such a vulnerable experience for you that you would appreciate that little extra support from him. You got this.

[NamerOfStars]

I agree. He may not realize that opening up like that was a struggle for you, and/or might not've known how to respond, and so gave a noncommittal reply, hoping to move the conversation on to more solid ground. Let him know how much it meant to you.