If they have stopped abusing you, they have taken a hiatus. Although they can still be somewhat controlling, too clingy, demanding and still gets aggressive during disagreements. As in they get in your face, call you names or try to manipulate the situation. The only thing that’s changed now is that they no longer hit you and the aggression, controlling and demanding ways aren’t as often as before but it‘s still there but they’re doing other things to prove to you they care. They’re treating your better/different in terms of intimacy and affection. They’re running you baths, buying you flowers, getting your feminine products for you, cooking for you, posting you on social media etc would all that be enough for you to forgive them 100 percent and believe that they have changed 100 percent? Or is it all just bare minimum effort?
Would this kind of effort be enough from someone who abused you in the past?
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I might give them a new chance after several years post-breakup (more than 5 at least, but even 5 sounds not enough to me to actually "change"), assuming they started a path in understanding and changing themselves, maybe with the help of a psychologist. Not just:"I promise I will be better", that is bullshit if there was no long term work on that behind. I wouldn't expect a relevant change after just a couple of years of work, I think it's physically impossible.
If he treats you better now, consider that he might be putting an effort there just to get you back again, and to be sure you stay. In different circumstances, we are different. Think about the very first date you had with him, did he attack you? No... Would he attack a coworker like that? Maybe not... When reconciliating, of course everyone is "better", but you have to see in the long run, when things are again settled and the norm kicks in again, to really see if he changed.
Regardless, his effort doesn't matter, you don't owe him any relationship. What matters is how you feel. If you feel like walking on eggshells, anxious, unsafe, and that you can't open up to him, then that sounds like a bad relationships. Buying flowers are an easy material thing and don't make up for the feelings he causes to you of course because the "lack of flowers" is definitely not the cause.
So try being more focused on the way you feel, and if you don't feel good enough for your standards, then don't give it another try.
If they remained in counseling I would not date him/her until the changes were more prominent
No. I wouldn’t give them another chance. Abusers rarely change. From my experience they get more abusive.