Have I just been emotionally damaged or am I just abnormal from this relationship?

[Anonymous]

When I feel like I'm doing the right thing I'm told I'm not.

I work my butt off sometimes to bring income. He admits that he did fake sick twice for a week because I'm not pushing him to work. I like leftovers. He doesn't. After a long day at work I don't have the energy to cook or the grocery store is closed. I come home late and we do take out. He ends up saying "I told you so, we should have gone to the grocery store."

He asks family for money and spends it on necessities like renting a washer and dryer. Ends up telling me that he helped the house and I barely do so... But he borrowed the money.

I do most of the household chores. As much as I can do. I end up just sweeping a lot under the rug now. I get tired. He just takes out trash. Things build up until he gets fed up and does some rough cleaning and throws it in my face that he does more of a good job than me. But doesn't clean up after himself any other time and doesn't help keep the filth down to a minimum when I clean every other day.

I be around him when he rants about his hobbies or his new business to strangers that he is building. I feel like I stand aside just watching. He does try have me involved sometimes. I guess I'm just not open with people now a days. I think it's a me problem.

When I earn money for myself I end up spending it on him. His cannabis usage or gas. I help him. But most of the time I never have enough to get myself a haircut. He shows the cat more love than me.

He makes me feel like I'm incapable of things sometimes.

I just feel like when he is aroused he seeks me. He is highly sexually active. However, we don't cuddle or tease or play with my hair. He doesn't like touching or people touching him. But I need that. If I'm only touched when he is aroused and goes right into squeezing my boobs my defenses kick in and I don't find anything arousing.

Do I need to fix certain qualities of myself?

Am I just not trying hard enough?

Do I have to be a stronger woman?

[Finchie40]

No you need a better man period , your boyfriend is a selfish person that only really cares about himself , while you are at work, why isn’t he making dinner before you get home and having dinner ready for you before you get home? ? For a relationship to survive both partners have to put in the same effort , You clearly don’t have that with him , You are in a one sided relationship, When a partner starts blaming you for things that they could of easily done without you , they are a narcissistic piece of shit , And a manipulator, You and your partner should be a team working together not against each other. So your boyfriend points fingers at you before pointing fingers at himself , and that is t good , it shows he truly doesn’t value you and just likes the convenience of you , if you were his priority he wouldn’t hesitate to be your team partner and help take weight off your shoulders by stepping up and doing his share of the chores without criticizing you and belittling you , and if he is smoking weed all the time I guarantee hi is more useless than anything so you might want to really reconsider this relationship because it sounds like you are in a relationship with a child that only cares about himself. He is manipulating you to believe that you are wrong when really he is wrong. You my as well just be a blow up doll for him cuz he clearly doesn’t really value you , he likes the convenience of you

[ohsheeT]

Now you're going to be okay when you wake up a little bit more and realize that he's not the guy that you really think that he is and he's going to keep doing what he's doing until you leave because he thinks that he has got you right where he wants you and he thinks that you're not smart enough to figure it out I don't even know you and I know you're smart enough to figure it out and I know it's just a matter of time when you put one foot in front of the other and you never look back

[LazerBean]

No, obviously you're not doing things right by choosing to be with a loser boyfriend like that.

[Anonymous]

Nope. You both talk but neither one listens. Sounds pretty normal in today's society to me. I'd be interested to hear his take.