How can I support someone to heal from break-up?

[Anonymous]

I have feelings for a person who had a bad break-up in the last year. I recently knew about it, and even though I still have feelings, but I want him to be happy. I heard his ex was emotionally damaged, but I bet he is as well, even after this time. How I can support him, should I try to reach out and try to get them back after this long distance ( because I heard they were very happy together)
I know this may hurt me, but I still want to see him happy, what can I do?

[thatshydork]

Bring them things to comfort them and just generally be there to comfort them. Good examples of things you could bring them would be ice cream, chocolates, candies, baked goods, any of their favorite foods/junk foods, stuffed animals, their favorite drink or just generally something they like from their favorite coffee shop, boxes of tissues, or notes they can read to make themselves feel better. Things you could do with them that would help them forget at least for a little while about their break up are bringing them to the movie theater or watching a movie with them at home, hang out together, go out to eat with them, just generally spending time with them to let them know that they’re loved and so that they can forget their pain for even just a little while.

[Anonymous]

By being there for them. Encouraging them to heal. And this is the most important point. By demanding mutual respect. I don't care how much they're hurting or how bad they feel. That doesn't give them the right to just use your good nature.

You have to be a rock for them. But they have to try to heal. Too many people just want to wallow and that's narcissistic and not good for them or you.

I have a ladyfriend right now that I'm dealing with this withshe's dated two guys since her breakup and everytime she sees her ex-husband she just goes all to pieces. She's MY friend. I don't even know her boyfriend that well but from what I see he's been a saint. I told her 1. In my opinion she shouldn't even be dating yet. (But I get it). But if I was her boyfriend I would have told her to hit the bricks already.

I don't care how bad someone is hurting. If you're hurting that bad you shouldn't be dating yet. Because relationships are about TWO people not one.

[Anonymous]

Just being there to listen. But don’t push someone too much. Just let him talk and offer advice. But even if you have no advice just listening can be a great way. As well as doing some things for him. You know…

I would maybe consider expressing your feelings for him sooner then later. Shoot your shot. You never know when you won’t get that chance. He could find someone else.

If you can. Maybe give him a gift or a massage or something

[BCRanger10]

Your concern for this man and his happiness and well-being are good.

That said however, the best thing you can do for them is to leave it be! This is especially true if you're relying on rumors and gut feelings. If they broke up, there was a reason for it. So just don't meddle with it.

If you want to go out with him therefore, then you should make a move.

[abc3643]

DO NOTHING.

Trust me, I am talking from 41 years of experience.

That said, if he unilaterally reaches out to you, then simply listen.

[boggboss]

How do u think u could get them back together sorry

[Asker]

Not detailed idea, but probably setting something giving them a chance to talk. I didn't think about the whole process, I am in stage of should I or should I not

[boggboss]

I think u are putting way too much influence and importance on yourself and what u can do here

[Anonymous]

Just be their for them and offer the best advice you can, IF they ask for it.

[midnightmoon05]

who is this to you?

[peterrezeeek]

talk to him meet him... check on him daily