We have been together with my boyfriend for 8 months. When we first know each other, he already told me he is going to leave the country to go to his mother abroad because she is sickly. Even though of what he said, I still continue to go out with him and suddenly I developed feeling and I fell in love with him. Many things has happened to us, we already make a lot of sex, we travel together, we had fun and so activities together, we talk ever night before we sleep and anything a boyfriend and girlfriend possibillity do together in a relationship. All I know is I am with him until we both say to each other, “I love you and I love you too.”
Because of how fast time is passing, I was unaware that the moment I fear most would arrive. Next month, he will travel to work abroad. Despite my joy at his new job, I also worry about losing him. I even told him I wanted to follow him, but it seems he wasn't interested, saying that Iraq was a bad and dangerous place for me. I informed him that I supported in his goals and that I understood his desire to live with his mother. He replied, "No, I won't be living with my mother; I'm going to rent."I go to Iraq not for my mother but for myself.
I ask then, What will happen to our relationship if you already go abroad. He said he doesn't know because he is not sure what is going to happen to him there and what are challenges are there. He said, he doesn't want to discuss for now because it is stressful Topic.
We are going to meet next week. I am confused, my boyfriend will work abroad and he doesn’t know if we will continue our relationship. What should I do?
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I’ve been in a long distance relationship for years, and it all worked out well.
(4 years of long distance, coordinating schedules to ensure we have quality time together, flying back and forth, video chatting almost every day, 12,000+ km away. Now, I have an apartment in her hometown.)
It depends on how strong your commitment is to each other.
If you both believe it is worth fighting for, you can make it work.
But if you aren’t close enough to make that level of sacrifice, then breaking up may be best, if your bond is not strong enough yet to commit to the work.
Your boyfriend has a lot on his mind. He must be juggling so many things in terms of work, and his mother’s health, and travel logistics.
The best thing you can do is be supportive, help him de-stress, let him see how good of a girlfriend you can be during this stressful time.
When things have calmed down some more, and you both have a moment to breathe, then you can bring up the topic.
Instead of pressuring him to make a decision immediately, try to hear and understand what he thinks and feels about having a long distance relationship.
Process the thoughts and emotions together with him.
In my opinion, he should commit to an LDR.
Distance alone should not determine whether a loving relationship should end.
But, if he decides not to stay together, it just says he’s not serious enough about your relationship.
I hope the talk goes well. Whether the outcome is good or bad, you deserve closure.
Doesn't sound like a serious relationship. Move on. If you have to ask what you should do then move on.