Are both parties equal in a relationship?

[Kaamraj]

If you get into a relationship or marriage with someone:-

1. Taller than you - means you are shorter.
2. Stronger than you - means you are weaker.
3. More educated than you - means you're less educated
4. Wealthier than you - means you are less wealthy.
5. move into my home or where rent is paid by only myself - means you're living for free.

Then is there any case or obligation that I have to treat you with equality?

[Noether]

We shouldn’t defer to others (except for specific things that require height/strength) just because they’re taller or stronger than us. If that were the case we would all offer ourselves up to the bears so they might grant us the honor of eating us.


Women are on average achieve higher levels of educational attainment than men in the US and all other OECD countries. Women are more likely both to enroll and to graduate from an institution of higher learning than men are. Anyway, lower educational achievement is not a valid reason to treat a person disrespectfully.


Women do end to earn less after they have children while men earn more from that point on, but this is largely because women spend more time attending to childcare than men and while most women continue to work, many opt to work part time and a minority leave the workforce at least temporarily to look after their children better. Normally, you need to pay someone who looks after your kids, a stay at home parent does it free of charge, resulting in a decreased income if (typically) she was in the workplace prior during hours she now dedicates to childcare. A person providing you with free childcare deserves respect and appreciation, not to be put down and treated like an inferior for not making as much money as she would have if you simply hired someone to watch your kids and she used her time to increase her wealth by building a successful career.

[Kaamraj]

Women also look for men who are generally better than them in terms of education and more so income, so even if she were not to have children she'd still earn less than the man.

[Noether]

When it comes to education, that is demonstrably false. Since at least 2012 wives have on average achieved higher levels of education than their husbands. Only in 20% of marriages do husbands have higher levels of education than their wives in the US.

Single women without children actually make more money on average than single men without children– $65,000/yr on average vs. $57,000 for men. (Overall, just under half of all women ages 15-50 years old are childless, and ~43% have never been married). Wives on the other hand make on average $35,000 a year, less than they did prior to getting married. After having children, women’s incomes decrease while men’s increase, and only 16% of that increase on average is accounted for by increased efforts on the part of fathers. Dual income, childless married couples earn around $36,000 more altogether than dual income married couples with children, and $54,000 more than single income married couples, so the most profitable route would technically be not to have any children but simply to marry or remain single and combine their incomes.

Overall, 23% of wives (and 26% of married mothers) are unemployed, 51% of unemployed mothers have children under the age of 5, and the percentage of stay at home mothers continues to decrease steadily as the children get older. All of this points to the fact that wives who stay at home do so to care for young children, and then rejoin the labor force or become more involved in it as their children grow up, this is also clear when you look at the average income of women by age, which increases as they get older, peaking when they hit in their mid 40s.

[Anonymous]

Ladies, If you get into a relationship or marriage with someone-

1. Shorter than - means you are taller or the same height.

.

2. Fatter than you - means you are hotter.

.

3. Less educated than you - means you're more educated. And smarter and more intelligent.

.

4. Poor or broke - means you are wealthy.

.

5. Move into your home or where rent is paid by only yourself - means he is living for free.

Then is there any obligation that I have to treat HIM with equality? Do I have to treat HIM with respect? I mean, DO I HAVE TOO? Do I really have to? Do I actually have to be civil with him? Do I actually have to consider him a human being with feelings, wants and needs?

I mean.. I get that this would be my partner or husband, the one who will father my children and be there at my best or my worst. BUT.. do I actually have to treat him with equality and humility? Do I actually need to respect him and be there for him?

I mean, why do I have an OBLIGATION to do that. When I’m hotter. Men obsess over me. Why care, when I can get d-k in Point-2 seconds. Why care when my personal trainer is hotter and muscular.
RIGHHTTTT?

[Opinion Owner]

@kaamraj 😚

[OlderAndWiser]

People are not entitled to be treated in a particular way because we are all equal. We are NOT all equal. People are entitled to be treated in some ways, and to enjoy certain rights, because many of us adopt the belief that ALL people have certain basic and inalienable rights.

Aside from legal rights, if you choose to be in a relationship, you should be honest and let your partner know whether you are willing to commit yourself to strengthening and preserving the relationship. If you have that commitment, it requires that you trust and respect your partner. A belief that you are not equal, but better than your partner, is counterproductive to building a relationship. You can't be forced to respect a partner, or to treat them in a way that you would want to be treated, but there will be consequences for your attitude.

So, you have a choice to make about how you treat your partner, and that choice will bring about results, maybe good and maybe bad. Your choice.

[Drewtate]

Generally yes but the relationship will often take different roles broken down by gender

[A_Bell]

Frankly, I hate leading. I like my husband taking the lead on a lot of things. Why do women crave extra stress just because they want to be a boss.

In my opinion, the responsibilities of being in charge way outstrip any benefits unless you are unfit to lead because you plan on abusing the power.

Being in charge should be viewed as a burden, not a perk, if you are doing it correctly.

Maybe this is why so many women make bad leaders. Plenty of men are bad, don't get me wrong, but it seems that the only women who want power over others want it more for the power than for the responsibilities and duty.

This is a big reason I've hated pretty much every female authority figure in my life.

[DudeDiligence]

You just said what most of us are thinking, and knw is true, but are affraid to say for fear of being called sexist or an incel.

[A_Bell]

@DudeDiligence :(

[love_conquers_lust]

Fuck me. You have single friends?

[Dijntntb]

Female bosses are a joke to me.

[Anonymous]

First, of all I wouldn’t get into any relationship were someone has some sort of power over me. Secondly, I will always make sure my partner treats me right and respects me and cares about me before entering any sort of relationship. And lastly, it’s borderline EVIL, to see a relationship as “obligation that I have to treat you with equality”. That’s borderline evil and demonic. To have that mindset. Because then you’ll also mistreat and abuse your children. I advise anyone to never get into a relationship with that mindset and view on relationships. And women who see men with this mindset, RUN, RUN FAR AWAY!!

[Opinion Owner]

I’ve seen relationships where the woman had most of those things. And she would treat the man badly.
I’ve also seen relationships where the man is uglier than the woman. And due to this privilege the woman treat him badly and even cheats on him.

In relationships you need to have equality. Both the man and the woman need to be equal. Otherwise one will take advantage of the other. One will control the other. One will have power over the other and abuse the other.

My mother was in a dynamic were Dad used to verbally abuse her and treat her wrong in front of us. Growing up. And she had nowhere to go and nowhere to run. Cause she was poor and broke. She had nothing to her name. We were all trapped with that monster.
Both has to be equal.
@kaamraj

[Rei13]

Why even bother getting into a relationship where you’re not equals? Sounds like a waste of time to me. Both parties should give a hundred percent and when they can’t the other person is there to support their partner. One person might cook all the time and the other may clean, for example, so both still give but it isn’t 50/50 in cooking. Some people are stronger in one area and the other is stronger in another. You should balance each other.

[inhua]

relationships would work better if they forgot about equality and just showed respect to one another and what they bring to the table

all this "leagues" shit and equality is why there are so many problems in relationships today

Robin and Scottie Pippen are just as important even if they are not Batman or Michael Jordan

[OddBeMe]

Syd and Nancy probably had fights about equality.

[Zenpanda]

In all of them you have to put the same amount of work into the relationship and your partner. You circumstances may differ, but you are both in the same relationship. You provide support to what your partner can't do or needs help with and they do the same for you.
You lighten their load in whatever it may be and they do the same for you.
Be it mentally or physically, you do your part.

[Anonymous]

Its a matter of good morals and attitude. Many men treat their wives as slaves because they can, millions of women are trapped in an abusive homes, but a lot of good men also choose not to, because its not who they are. Women just have to choose wisely and/or get lucky that the man they love is one of the good ones. I would never allow myself to end up with a sexist man (and more) anyway.

[Opinion Owner]

@asker , have you ever been in love with a woman? Like truly love her? Care about her, and be cared for by her? If you currently are, or when you are, you should say these things to her and see how she feels about it, if she would still choose to stay with you when she knows that is the way of your thinking. No self respecting woman will stay. Good luck, though.

[OddBeMe]

He won’t understand the question

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah, i guess if he did he wouldn't have these thoughts in the first place.

[Anonymous]

Yes to 1,2, 5. 3 and maybe 4 both depends upon agreeing what is information and currency 'education' and 'wealthy'.

A lot of schools today sell crap and call it 'education' and a lot of people today think they are wealthy when all they have is a bunch of paper fewer and fewer people want.

[OddBeMe]

Funny that that piece of paper correlates to higher standards of living

[catarecute]

no you don't owe anyone anything but then she doesn't owe to stay with you. i would dump a guy straight away who is be a snob. there is nothing more unattractive than a snob.

[havingfun2023]

I'd say deep down either someone wears the pants, or someone thinks they wears the pants while their other half clearly is wearing the pants behind the camera 👀👀👀👀😁

[havingfun2023]

"puppet master" and "puppet strings" lol 🧵🧵🤣

[qupid911]

While those things can be applied, it doesn’t make someone better right off the bat. I would label it as having a slight advantage

[OddBeMe]

And you’ll find in non theocratic countries those qualities are widely shared. #saythanks

[Fireguy17]

Not 100% of the time, but you don't keep score and it works itself out over time.

It's OK if it isn't 50/50

[CaliAttorneyGuy]

Yes, if the girl is going to kill the spider, go check out that sound at 3 am, etc. 50% of the time.

[MJtheCoach]

Of course not! The man has to lead.. if you become a first ring soldier in the military, are you going to constantly challenge the lieutenant he’s gonna kick you out of the army..

[Heolurt]

They should be but in almost all cases, they aren't, especially in hetero relationships, where most women see men as worthless and see themselves as prizes.

[exitseven]

Yes, things might not be even all the time but it averages out.

[AnusNdaPainus]

Nope

men lead

women follow

Hall

Oats

simon

garfunkel

scooby

doo!

[OddBeMe]

Hall and Oates over Simon and Garfunkel?

[AnusNdaPainus]

@OddBeMe I was quoting Seth Rogan😂

[OddBeMe]

Lol :)

[Anonymous]

@EmyyWolf You've posted at least two opinions on this question (under multiple accounts, obviously). How do you expect anyne to take you seriously? Serious question.

[Nifrayu]

I would be perfectly okay letting my partner lead the relationship if she was wealthy.

[Anonymous]

no. never will be. but that doesn't mean you can't treat people as equals also...

[KrakenAttackin]

Equality is not only a fantasy in a relationship, no one really wants equality.

[grega239]

My past experiences would suggest we are not

[fuddly]

Probably not equals
But if a person is more giving, don't they also get more in a way? Karma

[whistlingwh0res]

they are both Cinderella and cinderella man so both the same

[OddBeMe]

Such a charmer…love those Islamists!

[Anonymous]

Good point.