Do men in general really think this way? Do women withhold sex from them?

[Anonymous]

How many of you think this is true?

Yes, it's true

Nah, I don't think it's true

[rigmarole]

I think when women actually want a relationship with a guy they overthink it. That causes them to panic with anxiety and delay things, to flake out, play games, and act out with all sorts of unusual behavior. They are emotionally investing in the person and are afraid to be rejected and hurt at that point. So as a result they do stupid shit that sabotages their chances. In contrast when they just want to get laid and don’t want to get back into a relationship at the moment for whatever reason, they tend sleep around with guys they know would be bad for a relationship to live our their sexual desires (i. e. bad boys). At that point they’re living in the moment... That way when the deed is done they can walk away with what they wanted and convince themselves that they don’t want to see that guy again. He’s an asshole and full of shit and a relationship would never work. It’s self sabotage pre-planned… So depending on what a they want at a particular time will guide their behavior. They don’t always want to live the same lifestyle. In fat it’s pretty common for women to want to run away and to reinvent themselves. It might be something as basic as dying their hair or buying a new outfit, or they might be sluting it up for a while and then all the sudden say no more, I feel dirty, I need to get my life in order and get into a stable relationship or maybe they actually do run away to a new home in a new city across the country and act like a completely different person… Shit some even change their names... As if that actually changes who they are. Thus why men always call women crazy... A lot of it is irrational fantasy land behavior.

[rigmarole]

*fact

[Miristheiss]

Well, of course it is true, and it is not true.

Some women will do that. Some will not.

Your question would have probably been more accurate if you posed it in a way of asking to people think MORE women than not would do this or MORE women would NOT do this.

Of course, some women will do this. Of course, not all women do this. So the real crux of the issue is the percentage of women men think do it. A lot of women or a minority of them.

A lot of girls do lots of stuff when they are the club girl type and they are in their "hoe" phase.

[whirled_up_girl]

That's a good point we're not all going to be the same.

[Daniela1982]

I haven't seen much in the way of questions here to make me think that women withhold anything. They are as horny as the men are and they just serve each other's purposes. As far as giving it up fast to good or bad boys? Yeah, they can't wait to spread their legs for the bad boys. I'm hoping that is because they don't consider them marriage material? Nah! That can't be right. Look how fast Sandra Bullock spread them for Jesse James, and then how fast he cheated with some tattooed bimbo. And then he cheated on her, and the next one.

[A_Bell]

Women are all different. We also change as we age.

When I was younger and on hormonal birth control, I held little appeal for a committed relationship, I went out with guys for fun.

Around the time I met my husband, I came off of it because of Migraines and some other issues and my outlook changed and relationships and the desire to raise a family overtook my views on dating. I don't know if it was 100% the cause, but I now warn younger women about the psychological effects of hormonal birth control on your psychology.

[RingOfFire]

I think there is a big psychological component to birth control too as well as the physical effect.

There is a concept called "moral hazard" which is applied frequently in economics. It is about the idea that when you think you are protected against the consequences of your actions, you are more likely to engage in risky or undesirable behavior.

[ImalwaysrightOK]

Ewww

[ManOnFire]

This is a fact. I literally just said that in my Take about men being weak with women.

But yeah, women definitely do this and I learned it the hard way as a young guy. Women compartmentalize sex and the types of men they will have it with. If she sees you're a good guy and can tell you'd be great for a relationship and that you would even make a great father, a woman will try to hold back sex and see if he'll work for it, or see if he'll still want her no matter what. Meanwhile she's giving it up easily to guys she would never even marry but they just excite her sexually.

My advice to guys is to never try to date these kinds of women at all. They don't actually value the guy, they just like the novelty of his pure intentions, and want to swing over to him when she's ready for a serious relationship.

[whirled_up_girl]

There are some of us who don't give it up easily for any guy though, because we're not sluts. Half the time guys on here say they want a woman with a low body count. The best way for women to avoid a high body count is not giving it up to just any guy, waiting a while to see if they're going to stick around. Hence my comment to the asker.

[ManOnFire]

@whirled_up_girl It’s always great that there are women with some values about sex and relationships, but unfortunately there are still many others doing what I and the asker's details are talking about.

[nastyb]

@ManOnFire

quite hilarious you're complaining about women withholding sex.

YET, you say you're only interested in women with low body count...

you can't date women with low body count... if you demand sex early on.

[ManOnFire]

@nastyb High or low body count has literally nothing to do with what I said in this answer.

[nastyb]

@ManOnFire

Has everything to do with your character as a person

[ManOnFire]

@nastyb You're either reaching, or you are a selective reader. Not a single case you make has any sense.

[nastyb]

@ManOnFire

You can only date women with high body count

Reality is... women with low body count dont tend to put out early

[ManOnFire]

@nastyb I can only date women with a high body count? Lmfao. And just how can that be? All these other guys on here are obsessed with wanting women with low body count. I can take a woman who's had sex in several RELATIONSHIPS, I just don't go for women who sleep around and hook up all the time.

But again, none of this has anything to do with the point I initially made in that many women want to pick and choose what kinds of men they want for a relationship, and which ones they'll sleep with in a snap. Regardless of whether me or other men care about high or low body count. Are you comprehending this yet?

[nastyb]

@ManOnFire

Women with low body count dont tend to put out.

You will never last in a relationship who won't have sex.

[ManOnFire]

@nastyb So which one is it? She has sex but still a low body count? Or she doesn't have sex at all? Very few men, and few women for that matter, are going to last in any relationship that is completely void of sex.

Buuuuuuuuuuut we are still deviating from what is actually being discussed here.

[nastyb]

@ManOnFire

You just complained about a woman not willing to put out. A guy like you would never last with a woman with low body count.

[ManOnFire]

@nastyb Go back and read through everything again we've talked about so far, little one. Tell me where I complained about that.

[tzdc21]

@nastyb It's not so much of demanding sex early on. It's the treatment of us compared to other guys you've had in the past. The ultimate compliment a girl can give a guy is giving to him something no other guy has gotten from her. The ultimate insult is not giving him what she's given to every other guy. If you have given sex out in like one or two weeks in the past, or even a few days, and you want me to wait months for it, I'm gonna think you don't value me as much and aren't attracted to me. Because when you are attracted someone, you naturally wanna have sex with them (not the only thing you wanna do, but still.) You denying it is counter-intuitive, ESPECIALLY if he finds out you've given it to other guys in that past way sooner. And a lot of guys know that a lot of girls have had ONS in the past or have given it up much sooner to other guys they have dated. That's why they get upset.

[nastyb]

@tzdc21

[The ultimate insult is not giving him what she's given to every other guy. If you have given sex out in like one or two weeks in the past, or even a few days, and you want me to wait months for it, I'm gonna think you don't value me as much and aren't attracted to me.]

don't be naive. any experienced woman knows that plenty of men pretend to be interested in women just to use her for sex. for some women, they learn as they get older that is better to withhold sex to see if the guy will still stick around to see if he truly likes her.

thats the same thing i learned as i got older too. a real man who truly wants you will stay even if you don't have sex with him.

[Because when you are attracted someone, you naturally wanna have sex with them (not the only thing you wanna do, but still.) You denying it is counter-intuitive, ESPECIALLY if he finds out you've given it to other guys in that past way sooner.]

yet you claim that you only date women with low body count. you would never be able to date a woman with low body count... if you expect her to have sex with you immediately the second she has feelings for you. You would only be able to date high body count women...

have you ever had feelings for someone then a year later you just absolutely hated this person and regretted having any sex with them? well yes... you would have healthier, better, sexual interactions with people who you know well rather than someone you barely know.

[tzdc21]

@nastyb No, a desperate and insecure man will stay even if you don't wanna have sex with him because he feels like he doesn't have any other options. And you must be confusing me with some other profile, because I never told you what type of woman I specifically date. And let me speak about the waiting game once more. That actually is more of a red flag than anything. Because a women who withholds sex, a guy just might perceive that as "I have nothing else to offer you. So since I know you want sex and I wanna keep you around, I'm gonna withhold it." Not a great look. AND here's what else it says. It says you're not attracted to me. And I'm looking for a relationship by the way, and I need a woman who leaves no doubt that she wants me, and if she withholds, then that's a red flag. And no I am not just looking for sex from a woman before you make that statement.

[tzdc21]

@nastyb Now if you withhold saying not on the first date to about a week, that's fine. But if it turns into a month, and then three months, and then half a year max, that's a major problem. Because a guy who even has serious intentions may get the wrong idea and leave because he's convinced that you're not really into him and you would have lost a good guy as a result.

[tzdc21]

@nastyb There is always a limit even with the ones that are wanting to commit. Depends on the guy for what that limit is. Some are longer than other but there's always a limit to where they get the message clear, move on and go find a woman who makes it clear that she's just as into him as he is with her.

[nastyb]

@tzdc21

you will only be dating sluts if you aren't willing to wait for sex. And it is exactly men like you who turn modern women into sluts. we have become a slut society.

It is men like you that is the reason why dating is so hard nowadays. Vast majority of women don't like to have sex early. But they are forced to because men have become such huge sex addicts that it is impossible to keep a man's attention without entertaining his dick. Women value building an emotional connection before sex. This emotional connection doesn't come within just a 3 or 4 dates.

Plus... you're just going to be sleeping with plenty of women you will eventually regret sleeping with... if you're gonna have sex that early.

All this premarital sex is also the reason why so many of our kids are born with disabilities or mental problems nowadays. The widespread use of birth control is the reason why so many our kids are fucked up. STDs are also currently the highest throughout history due to men like you.

quit being a sex addict and go to rehab.

[nastyb]

@tzdc21

[Some are longer than other but there's always a limit to where they get the message clear, move on and go find a woman who makes it clear that she's just as into him as he is with her.]

You can definitely make it clear that you are into a person without having sex with them.

if you can't show someone that you are deeply in love with them (without sex), it means you are not in love.

sex is not the only way to show love to someone.

you only believe sex is the only way to show love to someone is because there is nothing else to your life but only sex.

[tzdc21]

@nastyb Funny how you insert shaming language when I place expectations of which I have for my partner to live up to. Sex addict? Really? Come on now. And sex is one of the most effective ways to tell someone you're into them. But according to you, wanting to have sex eventually makes me a sex addict, lol. Okay.

[nastyb]

@tzdc21

there's a difference between a someone who has sex versus a sex addict.

just the same way someone has a beer once in a while versus an alcohol addict.

don't pretend you don't know the difference.

[Funny how you insert shaming language when I place expectations of which I have for my partner to live up to. ]

I'm pretty sure you have nothing else to offer besides sex.

[tzdc21]

@nastyb Oh yep absolutely. You hit the nail right on the head (sarcasm). Me saying that I eventually want to have sex with a woman I'm seeing is not enough to say that I am a sex addict. The fact that you keep trying to say that is absolutely hilarious. And now you're trying to say I have nothing else to offer as well? Seems more like you're itching for excuses to shame me because of my preferences. But go ahead and make false claims, you're really making my day.

[Anemone978]

Depends on the woman...
I withhold sex from everyone.. because I don't want to be used.. I have only had sex with my husband because he showed me he loved me..

I thought about being a hoe before and sleeping with hot guys but I just don't have the mental strength for that shit. I'm not into breaking my own heart and messing up my self esteem or self worth just to spend time with assholes LOL

[DarkWinterNights]

It’s different if you withhold it from everyone you aren’t serious with.

[Anemone978]

@DarkWinterNights But with information like this how would a guy know the difference lol

[normalice]

No. Women just aren't interested in sex the same way men are. Some men can't really understand how that's possible because they are self absorbed, and so they make themselves believe its women's fault instead of their own inability to understand the situation.

[genericname85]

i think this is a false comparison. the girl that withholds sex from a man untill they are commited will not just have sex with a bad boy. the woman who is wating for a serious relationship and the one who likes to get sex are 2 different people. obviously if she's fucking a player, she's not the girl he wanted in the first place. so in essence, this is just complaining and mental gymnastics about the fact that he didn't get fucked.

[ImalwaysrightOK]

This is sooo wrong. Most women DO have this sick and twisted idea to have sex immediately with a hot guy and then make a boyfriend wait, signaling that she's willing to be a pornstar for a random but give vanilla sex to a boyfriend in 6 months or whatever. Disgusting slut mentality.

[genericname85]

@ImalwaysrightOK men treat super hot girls differently too. that's very normal.

[whirled_up_girl]

I don't believe in hook ups so I make every guy wait till I know there will be some type of commitment. I don't care if the guy things I'm easy because fact is I'm not and if that's all a guy wants I have no problem with him looking elsewhere.

[LiamJHayden]

Maybe some, but really that is more a guy attitude in my experience. What I mean is I know a lot of guys who classify women as "playthings" or "relationship / potential wifey." I could count on one hand the number of women who've displayed the same mentality.

[Lionman95]

I don´t think it´s true on average but I´ve seen something similar happen twice in younger ages where guys were cheated on with the excuse that their girls met a guy that was so exciting that they had to sleep with him. But though those cases were similar to the statement in some they were different in many others.

[ImalwaysrightOK]

It's 100 percent true. Not every woman, but the majority thinks this way. No big deal to spread her legs and be a p0rnstar for some hot random guy in a club, but a guy who's a boyfriend, she'll withhold and make him "earn it". Slut mentality 101.

[nastyb]

very few men are interested in dating a woman for 6 months for sex. Unless he is completely obsessed with her, he will not stay long term. Eventually, he will just slowly drift away to other women who are willing to make his private parts feel good.

even if she doesn't give sex, he will almost always find excuses to touch her sexually pretty early on.

this is coming from an experienced dater

[Ms_Facesitter]

That isn't true. If I like you and the chemistry is there as well as the mood, I am ready. I just take some time warming up to somebody. Not because I don't want to come off as easy, not to keep him interested. But just because I don't fall for people easily.

[Joshydavid25]

I think all these overly generalized statements from Redpills and feminist are just silly.. Yeah sure some women might play the 3 month rule for a guy she really wants to lock down, but there's plenty of women who just have those principles of abstinence til a certain point..

[Anonymous]

Yes and no. This guy is right in spirit just not fully in reasoning. First off your sisters on this site confirm this. So it's not even a debate.😆

But to say any one woman is this or that is folly. Yes women withhold sex. But not for any one all encompassing reason like this. And they also give it away like f***ing candy to the right guy at the right time (not necessarily a badboy).😆

So to make a blanket statement like this guys is very inaccurate. Welcome to the internet.😆

[smilelots]

I am most certainly hope it’s not true and I don’t believe that is true, but there are some people out there that use that yes maybe that’s one of the reasons we have so many problems in relationships, men and women. Why not just be yourself and you will probably find someone more suited to you long-term. Then playing games

[Anonymous]

I remember this woman said 'when you come over don't expect us to be having sex'. I genuinely agreed and said 'yep, we don't know each-other that well and I was thinking exactly the same thing'. After I said this she seemed kind of caught off guard and said 'what makes you think you could resist me for a whole 3 days?

But in answer to the main question, a lot of women do this and guys are aware. But a woman can only withhold sex to a man that places sex on a pedestal.

[EmmaMary]

@HelpfulWoman & @Nikki1989 have beaten me to it... Thank you Ladies. x

[DaySpring]

You shouldn't shame people for being Incel. It doesn't make you or I better than another better we are fucking or dating people. It's a horrible thing to shame someone for which is what the people you tagged did. All types of people think this way.

[shades777]

i noticed the healthier and fitter I was the less time I had to wait, I think of it as car insurance, the changes of you getting s good rate increase with a longer history of a good driving record, so the better you look the better rates of sex you'll have in general amongst the women you pick, healthy good looking fit men are rarer than you think

[Billlewis]

I think that's probably true to some extent, but that doesn't bother me at all. I just deal with whatever comes my way and I always try to do my best to please the female.

[Billlewis]

I wish women would do that more often. Relationships in general would be much better off if they did.

[BourbonAndBacon]

I used to run an office of a half dozen women in their 20s and 30s and I can confirm 100% that some of them did this

[BryanMoore]

This is literally INSANE and manipulative behaviour. Who gives a fuck, just enjoy your time with each other rather than playing dumb mind games.

Also men who think this are fragile insecure incels

[Unit1]

And thus some men are trying to get rich or turn into bad boys and then have sex with many women the same easy way. It just works.

Sexual deprivation should be considered a non-fatal type of hunger.