A year ago I finally fully ended things with my ex. He was extremely emotionally abusive. He’d use the things he knew would hurt me most and do exactly that or worse. At the beginning, he even abused me sexually for about 2 weeks after only knowing me for +/- a month. He claimed he never intended to hurt me, that his own traumatic past (sexual, physical and emotional abuse with some neglect if it’s true) had ruined him so badly he didn’t know why he’d do all those things and that he never meant to hurt me. Stupidly, I wanted to believe him. It hurt too bad and I just couldn’t face the truth at first as I believe it would have literally killed me.
In the end, he would treat me worse and worse. He’d tell me he didn’t want the relationship, but that he did want me. He’d say he didn’t really knew what he wanted and that he needed to figure it out. He’d ask for a break and later he would break up with me multiple times, but act like we’re still together after. In a fight he once said he wanted an open relationship (1 of my known fears). I discovered that he reinstalled Tinder and had been adding 20+ girls he met at parties (he’d make excuses not to take me anymore by then) on Insta. He was dming most of those girls, almost begging them to meet again.
It was clear he never loved or cared for me. So my question is this: he desperately wanted to break up, yet when I was the one to break up (for real) or he’d notice I was done, he would try to fix things (treat me better, say that this time he’ll do it right, or say that he’ll better himself and we’ll try again in the future). He tried to hide how he was crying when I broke up with him (he never cries), and begged me not to block him bc he didn’t want to lose me completely/forever.
I know guys treat girls bad so they’d break up, and I believe he was doing that, but why then would he refuse to let me go when it happened?
I had to fully block him to be sure he couldn’t easily bother me again, as he’d keep “checking in”.
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Wow, you really lived a TOXIC relationship! The thing that you "break free" is very well and many girls/women should follow your lead, by the sound of it it was a narcissist, but also a tiny "bebe" that didn't want to lose his "momma", is crazy how extreme you lived with him, and he tried to beg you to not block him...🤦♂️, Good for you, now you can move on freely...👏👏👏
I dont think he intended for u to end things he enjoyed the power of u not being able to leave and when u did tried every manipulation tactic ti get u to come back
Good for you don't go back