Am I overreacting by being paranoid/upset that my boyfriends ex is dating his twin brother?

[Anonymous]

To summarize this mess in my head, I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for almost 7 years. My boyfriend's identical twin is dating my boyfriend's ex. I initially thought they only kissed, but later found out they were together for 4 months and were intimate. This was 12-13 years ago, however, I feel extremely uncomfortable and disturbed by this situation, experiencing nightmares and feeling sick whenever I am around her. Even more so because when I am around her, she constantly talks about her relationship and her ex (not my boyfriend) when we are alone together, making me even more uncomfortable. Despite expressing my feelings to her, she continues her behavior, which is what is leading me to seek advice and feedback on how to move past this situation.

[RoseySarah]

I think your being smart and worried for a reason we usually are during things but this thing with your bfs twin sound alike it won't last long.

At best it's to get you away from him! Being with you getting under your skin worried so you leave and she can have your boyfriend.

Or is just trying to mess up her lives. Sounds like she does not care about the twin.

Get her to admit that and record it on your phone to show to your boyfriend and his brother!

Really when alone these manipulative people are easy to show their true colors and like to brag

Esp ially when worked up

Lol why not brag about your amazing boyfriend to get her mad have her say how she still cares and gets the copy 😂

[Asker]

I thought so, too... However, they have been together for over a year now and live with each other. I don't think she is trying to get with my boyfriend necessarily. She told me she likes attention, and that is why she wears revealing clothing because she likes the amount of looks she gets. I really think it's just a cover-up for insecurities, which is truly heartbreaking, and I wish I could help.

Part of me wishes I got some of the crap she says on recording because it's insane. I just can't bring myself to do it. The truth will get out eventually if it hasn't already.

I do brag about my man a lot, then she brags about hers like it's a competition and always tries to one-up me. I usually back down because I'm not a competitive person and have no interest in playing her game 😅

She is a really sweet girl besides never allowing me to talk and when I do, she changes the topic back onto whatever she was talking about and completely disregards/ignores what I said. There was several times I was talking to other people and she came down and cut into our conversation about something completely off topic which usually resulted in those people walking away 😭 I've tried so hard to like this girl and I just can't bring myself to no matter how hard I try. Every time I get a little closer to be somewhat comfortable around her, she says some shit that just makes me want to scream 🙃

I'm so sorry for rambling on & on. I just really wanted to get someone else's opinion besides my Mom 🤣 Thank you so much for taking the time to type your response out! It truly means a lot 😊

[RoseySarah]

No so fine like helping others ramble on!
She sounds better then I thought but still. Sorry you have to deal with her!

Really sometimes 🤔 I wish my brothers picked better gfs!

One has an amazing wife and she is like a sister. My other one picks the most toxic girls I fear they might marry.

Open to all rank kings if you wanna ramble on private give me a follow and message!

[RoseySarah]

Lol here is my opinion
Do you Know Anyone in your Life who is a Narcissistic Sociopath? ↗

One year then it's so much harder just get a recording app and keep it ready! Although his brother might know how she is by now!

[Asker]

I'm pretty sure he does know. She told me multiple times that he gets sick of her talking about her ex but she still continues to do it. I just think that's disrespectful 😭

They do seem to love each other and be happy though so I need to just learn to be happy for them and stop allowing my insecurities and emotions to take over.

I won't ever bring myself to recording, though. I feel like that is just fighting fire with fire which isn't something I want to do. I want to like her. I just can't figure out how when she constantly annoys me with drama and stuff that doesn't even matter. LOL. I'm such a hypocrite saying that because none of this I'm saying matters. I need help 💀

[RoseySarah]

It's more dumb like why talk about the guy what was so social that he can't fill?

Be nice but don't be trusting! Really it's not a good relationship 😔 you have the right to feel that way but your doing good trying to be happy for him.

No your doing great and really you can try your best but she rubs you the wrong way and she always will

Can't force someone to like another we are not made that way!

Bet she has screamed her exes name during sex with him lmao

[Asker]

Thank you! I appreciate it.

Not so sure about the sex thing though 🤣 She cheated on her ex with two different guys (one of which is the twin brother she is with now). Apparently her ex wasn't putting out which led her to finding someone who would.

I never would have thought my brother-in-law would go after a taken woman. I guess I don't know him as well as I thought I did. But hey, they have been together for over a year now so maybe they are in fact good for each other. Who knows 🙃

[RoseySarah]

Who knows and yeah some people do bad and weird things. He is not really like your brother just seems to be!
My sister's are twins and while they look alike so different in morals and likes

[Asker]

People really seem to forget that just because they look similar, they are very much different!

[RoseySarah]

They do always forget!
So funny sometimes 🤣

[Anonymous]

I think you are being overly paranoid but I understand why you would feel uncomfortable. It is kinda weird (especially on your boyfriend and his twin’s end, why would they wanna date the same person? Why would she be okay with dating her ex’s sibling) but if everyone is mature about it then it should be okay. I do think there needs to be some clear boundaries set between the four of you tho

[Asker]

I agree. The three of them are handling it well. I'm the one that needs to work on dealing with it like a mature adult.

I admit that I'm the issue. I have insecurities that I need to work on and I need to stop allowing my emotions to take over.

[Opinion Owner]

I know it’s not easy, I also have insecurities that sometimes gets in the way of my relationship so I can somewhat relate. Best of luck to you tho!

[BourbonAndBacon]

It's a little WTF. I would NEVER date my brothers ex

[Asker]

Even if it was someone from high-school? I thought maybe I was overreacting since it's been such a long time. I'm more so uncomfortable since they were intimate, though. If it never went that far, I wouldn't be weirded out.

[BourbonAndBacon]

I don't think you're overreacting because it's weird. When I grew up, a guy would NEVER ask out his friends ex. That's not cool.

[Asker]

Yeah.. I honestly thought it was breaking "bro code", haha.
Thank you so much for responding!! :)

[Iron_Man]

It’s odd it’s strange

[Asker]

Thank you for your response!

[Iron_Man]

Sure….

[Anonymous]

Yes you are, it is none of your business.

[Asker]

Thank you for your response! :)