What do you think of a woman who never dated after a break up that happened 5 years ago?

Question

No casual or serious relationships since then. It was her first relationship. Do you think thats childish or immature behavior?

SlightlyBurnedPizza · Accepted Answer

This is a huge green flag for a guy we men don't desire experienced women as long term partners we really care about growing with them from 0.

I (26m) am the first boyfriend that my girlfriend has had (20f) and I respect her a lot for that. The fact she chose to go out with me and trusts me to be her boyfriend where I know she rejected pretty much everyone else puts my head in the clouds for her.

This is really important to guys who are in it for the long run, however guys who want you for a casual relationship aren't interested.

Girls that take relationships seriously aren't easy to sleep with and require a lot more time and effort to get to that point, something the 'pump and dump' guys generally aren't interested in. I think the fact that you take guys seriously before considering them is something worthy to respect.

Now I will say in todays society of instant gratification its not easy to find a guy that is willing to put in the effort AND is a good guy that you're attracted to. Although once you do this will be a massive green flag for him.

Although don't let this go too much to your head as guys still consider other things then this as well.

I hope this helped and I wish you the best of luck.

BoopBoopBeep · Accepted Answer

I'm not interested in dating someone who isn't over their ex, and 5 years seems to indicate that. I'd be competing with her idealistic, unrealized version of him, and that's not fair to me or her.

LaFemmeFatale_1 · Accepted Answer

I broke up 1.2 years ago and dated 7 guys in the next 8 months. They didn’t work out, as I wasn’t ready.

Take your time.

But don’t dwell in your past.

Life goes on and you are good enough to be loved again.

ChooChooHaha · Accepted Answer

Not at all. She could just not be interested in people.

OlderAndWiser · Answer

It is sad that someone has been so devastated that they are not recovered after five years.

Zenpanda · Answer

That's fine.
Everyone has the right to take as much time as they need.
There might be an underlying issue, so she would benefit from looking for some help.
But whether that is the case or not, she doesn't need to justify how she wants to live her life.

ProbablyClueless · Answer

You should definitely take your time and only date when you are ready, but I would see someone like that as being way too fixated on the past.

You never want to tell someone how they should feel, but at that point it's kinda time to move on. I would say that unless the relationship lasted a really long time during formative years (like a decade through your teens), or something really fucked up happened like intense abuse; any recovery time longer than a year is more than enough.

BadApple69 · Answer

Not childish at all. Some people get so crushed that recovery isn't possible. But just like falling off a horse, you need to get right back on and try again. The longer you wait the harder it is.

JacobJordan · Answer

that is a green flag. 1 previous relationship means you made a mistake and left. what changes it from a green to a red flag is if you make a second mistake resulting in a third relationship. because that would mean you aren't great at picking guys to date.

Uby10000 · Answer

We all need our time, some people need years, others merely hours... is only up to you actually. And in my honest opinion it's not related to being mature or not at all (because again, it depends on the person)

Sasha0426 · Answer

Why would that be childish or immature? Not jumping into another one right away is the smartest decision. That’ll give you time to get to know yourself better and take a breather.

serious_miss419 · Answer

Ironic as I say this, Don’t listen to what other people say about; when and how you are meant to process it. Follow your gut, be good to yourself in the process.

236color · Answer

Depends a lot of things, was the relationship abusive, how old is she, was this a marriage? I don't think I'd ever call it "childish" or immature.

DextroShade · Answer

It's a huge red flag 🚩 that you never got over that guy and are too damaged for subsequent relationships. You wasted five of your best years for nothing, it's equivalent to a dude gambling away half his inheritance.

Anonymous · Answer

I’d either think she was really heartbroken and needed time to heal or she’s just been having casual sex ever since

sheikalana · Answer

She probably been through something that deeply hurt her and took the time to heal.

TheSpaceGnome · Answer

No thats normal, it takes time to find another match.

smilelots · Answer

it is what it is nothing wrong with when you decide to try again it took me just over 2 years to ask a woman out, after my x and I split up

Starrrboy · Answer

Well I'd think that relationship was below her expectations so she's taking it slow before she could let someone into her life...

Billlewis · Answer

That would be very discouraging to me, because much of a woman's appeal lies in the number of sexual relationships she's had previously.

DiegoO · Answer

I think that a woman who decides that, is very wise. Those that doesn't give their self enough time to heal, oftenly end in tumultuous relationships.

Dargil · Answer

She would tell me this? There is likely a back story. I'd give it 3 or 4 dates of talk to figure out whether to proceed.

glennos89 · Answer

That's a woman I prefer, I'm the same I'm single for 6 years now after breakup I also haven't been dating anymore

Raaj4you · Answer

Find a good guy. You have missed your golden period, 5 years of relationship and lots of sex.

exitseven · Answer

Maybe she found other things to do. I would not think it was weird

ChicoFromThe305 · Answer

Lack of motivation, which I can completely understand

Anonymous · Answer

She has mental issues and probably needs therapy.

BurrsBlackCobras · Answer

No not at all Now if it was like 10 breakups within the span of 5 years then that would be a different story

Anonymous · Answer

I'm in a bit of a similar position. It's not that I'm deeply wounded by the experience but I haven't found anyone I connect with since my breakup.

Hormuzan · Answer

I think its great, in my opinion the less relationships/dates a girl has had the better.

TdotRep2023 · Answer

No that's just saying she has no game.

Fireguy17 · Answer

Good for her, out having fun.

nawtee_me · Answer

Welcome to the club….

PreciousJewel · Answer

Why does that even matter? Don't date just to date

Luckycharms12 · Answer

Think there afraid

What do you think of a woman who never dated after a break up that happened 5 years ago?

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What do you think of a woman who never dated after a break up that happened 5 years ago?

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