How can I get past my girlfriend ptsd?

[Qwerty098765]

Long story short.

During sex I triggered my girlfriend PTSD. She didn't make me aware until several days after, which I'm very proud of her for doing. We came up with a safe word to mitigate a situation like this from happening again. This issue now is I'm no longer comfortable to have sex. My girlfriend passiveness has been an issue our entire relationship, and this situation shows how passiveness can negatively effect a relationship. I no longer trust her to speak up if she's uncomfortable and I feel like she just has sex to please me. (This reasoning is not just from this situation but a accumulation of many). I'm not sure how to get past this or if it's something that can be resolved. I want a less passive partner but I don't want to change who my girlfriend is. Any opinions would be appreciated!

[Oliverlogan263]

Dude, that's a really tough situation. The most important thing is making sure your girl feels supported getting through her PTSD. Maybe try talking openly but gently about how you're both feeling, and see a counselor together if possible. They can help you cope in healthy ways.

For now back off intimacy until you both feel 100% comfortable. Spend quality time together doing other fun activities where you can bond emotionally without pressure. Compliment her on things like her smile or laugh to show you care for her whole self.

Bring up any concerns about communication later, once things are calmer. For now focus on listening without judgment so she opens up in her own time. With patience and teamwork you can rebuild trust - but don't push her. This will take time to work through properly.

Just keep affirming you're there for her no matter what. With compassion you'll get through stronger in the end bro.

[XXTruthfulOgrexx]

Personally, nothing against your girlfriend but if my girlfriend had this type of reaction, my first question would be has she sought out a good therapist? If not, I would require she immediately seek out a therapist and start a healing journey or I would end the relationship. This type of trauma will keep having negative effects unless she addresses them at a professional level.

It can be addressed but not if she does not seek out the correct help. You two will never be able to over come this type of trauma response without help and if she is unwilling to get that help then the relationship should end because you will have to sacrifice way to much to try and deal with these types of responses.

I am more than willing to support that journey but she has to get on the path and take the necessary steps to start it.

[MissBoogus]

Sounds like our relationship, I just cried for 4 years while he did me until I just learned to stop freaking out lmao

[LemiaOfThunder]

by learning about loving yourself