So the story to this question is quite long, so I am going to explain it as much as possible. I met this Colombian girl on this dating site. The site seems to be legit, but the girl I have been talking to is from Medellin Colombia, but lives in Bello outside Medellin as what she has told me. I have been talking to this girl for about a year going on now, in the process of getting to know her I have noticed some inconsistencies in what she tells me about her. I had to keep insisting on that she tells me the truth about who she is, and she finally told me some truths about her, because she states that she actually has feeling for me and wants to be with me. Before she told she had siblings and only hangouts with her family including cousins, but to correct this she told me that she had no siblings, and those cousins she hangout with are just friends that she grew up with. Also I would tell her I would travel to Colombia just to meet, but she would always tell me no, and that she would come to me because of her father. She tells me that her father apparently runs a business in Colombia and apparently was born in the states, and is really over protective of her, and tells me that her father keeps her in a nice neighborhood. But to find out from research Bello Colombia is not safe. So I asked why she lives in Bello and not somewhere a bit more safer if her father has money, she told me because he loves his city bello and can’t leave it, so since things weren’t making since I asked her if her father is in a gang, and she told me that he is involved with the cartel. She tells me she wants to finish her studies for college but her father keeps her busy doing things for him which she won’t say what it is. I was planning on going to Colombia to at least meet her, but I am not now from things I am seeing about Colombia with drugging with the women and also knowing her father is involved with cartel. So should I still trust this girl?
I had a guy friend that spent 4 years (closer to 5) dealing with an LDR girlfriend and after all that I witnessed him go through, I can’t accurately say your woman is catfishing you but I’d advise you trust your gut and don’t ignore the red flags.
My friend did everything he could to verify her story, brushed off the inconsistencies since he began to love her and really tried to put his faith in her. But she was just too shady, too many stories and things that didn’t add up. After about 3 years he pushed and pushed to meet up in her city and she agreed.
He took the time off work, made the arrangements, flew out there, got a room at a hotel she recommended since (allegedly) her parents wouldn’t allow him stay at the house, made plans for things to do while he visited for the weekend, etc etc. Only for her to ghost him once he was there and she stayed gone for like 3 months before trying to salvage things. But this is only one of several hurtful and disappointing experiences for my friend.
You have been presented with red flags that you seem to keep dismissing due to the feelings you’ve gained for this woman. All I can say is don’t invest any money or more time into this woman if it’s looking like a dead end. You could find someone who’s at least in your country, that is more hopeful of a situation and not what looks like a trap.
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Don’t waste more time or energy. Where would this go since it’s starting out with dishonest and confusion?
find someone local who you can meet and have a good relationship with.
Sounds quite dodgy, to me! If she starts asking you for money to help her come to you, it's a scam!! Usually, it goes like this: she's coming to see you and can't wait to see you. On her way to the airport, she stops someplace to buy you a present and everything's wonderful! Then, she gets to the ticket line at the airport and realizes that, because she blew all that money on your present, she's not got enough for the plane ticket and needs YOU to send her more money to pay for the ticket. Usually a very odd amount. Not like, $100 but, something like $97.52. This makes it sound more legit. She CAN'T go back home to ask her family/friends for the cash because she already told them all that she's coming to see you and, if she went back, now, they'd all laugh at her so, it's up to you to pay her way. Of course, if you DO give her the money, you'll never hear from her, again! And, if you don't, she spends a few more days begging from you and, once she gets the idea she's NOT getting the cash, she tries to insult and belittle you into feeling sorry for her so you'll send her the cash. IF she really even IS a girl!!
As someone who has dealt with a lot of catfish scammers and hackers I would highly suggest you ditch this woman she can’t keep her facts straight to you and if her father is that highly protective and part of the cartel he would have your a$$ kill in seconds if you go near her, I know I sound harsh on this but for your safety and the fact her story keeps changing no way dude cut her loose
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I've read your exchange with Holly and honestly this has disaster written all over it.
I've been in your shoes. It might be worthwhile to reflect on what is drawing you to this stranger who won't even video chat you, compared to women in real life? I mean, on a deeper level.
friends of mine from columbia traveled there as they have property there. there's apparetly good areas and bad. if you knew someone columbian you trusted, be easier to sort her out.
as it is, I don't trust it. open communication required which isn't happening.
too risky.
Well, the good news is she actually admitted it. (And that took some courage on her part.)
The bad news is the situation still is what it is. So I certainly wouldn't go there to visit her. You can let her visit you, though, if you want (in a public place. And don't give her any private information!)No, you shouldn't. Stop wasting time on long-distance relationships.
Stop being a dumb ass trying to meet shady women online in foreign countries who are trying to take advantage of you. Just find a woman you can go see whenever you want who lives nearby.
You should draw the line at giving her a credit card number or Venmo her some cash
She's obviously a catfish
Fuck around and find out
I wouldn't trust it
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