Back in October I send a follow request to a guy I had gotten to know somewhere around August, but he didn't accept at the time. I didn't know about his online activity so I'm not sure if he ignored or was oblivious but his following/follower list had been variable.
Now a few weeks back this man started joking about loving me. Whether he was sarcastic or truthful is hard for me to decipher, hence I don't know how to feel about it. However, he repeated himself multiple times so I felt like maybe he does not dislike me at least. I haven't seen him since, so I haven't been able to ask about it again.
Nonetheless, I came across his facebook profile through a mutual friend and have been wanting to add him, but I feel like that might be inappropriate or annoying to him since he didn't accept my Instagram request either.
Would it be alright to add him on Facebook, months later, or should I better not? I don't know how this person truly feels about me and I don't want to be annoying, but since he joked about loving me I felt like he might not dislike me that much after all. (Our relationship has never been bad, rather distant at times).
Would it be alright to send a new request or would you consider it annoying/off putting? Or would he have added me if he wanted to be friends?
Now a few weeks back this man started joking about loving me. Whether he was sarcastic or truthful is hard for me to decipher, hence I don't know how to feel about it. However, he repeated himself multiple times so I felt like maybe he does not dislike me at least. I haven't seen him since, so I haven't been able to ask about it again.
Nonetheless, I came across his facebook profile through a mutual friend and have been wanting to add him, but I feel like that might be inappropriate or annoying to him since he didn't accept my Instagram request either.
Would it be alright to add him on Facebook, months later, or should I better not? I don't know how this person truly feels about me and I don't want to be annoying, but since he joked about loving me I felt like he might not dislike me that much after all. (Our relationship has never been bad, rather distant at times).
Would it be alright to send a new request or would you consider it annoying/off putting? Or would he have added me if he wanted to be friends?
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
2Opinion
Yo girl, that's a tough call. Honestly I probably wouldn't send a second request. Here's my thinking:
- If he didn't accept the first Insta request, that was probably a signal he's not super interested in connecting online. Could be nothing personal, some dudes just aren't big on social media.
- The joking comments about love seem playful but also kinda vague. Hard to know what he really meant by that without getting clarity in person.
- Sending another request after he ignored the first one could come across as needy or like you're not taking the hint, you know?
- Dude may be shy or just likes his space online. A friend request could weird him out or make things awkward between you.
My advice would be let it be for now. If you see him around again, maybe casually bring him up in conversation to see how he really feels. But I wouldn't double message him online since there's a risk of coming on too strong. Play it cool for now - you don't want him to feel pressured if he's not that into connecting that way. Make sense? Let me know if you need any other thoughts!
Totally got your point.
Did add him eventually (hadn't seen you reply yet)
But he did accept and later liked an older post of mine, so I guess we're good :)
Thank you for the feedback!
Ayyy I'm so glad to hear he accepted your request sis! And that he went and liked an old post of yours too - boy is for sure feeling you now.
Told you a little friend request wouldn't scare him off. He was probably thinkin bout you too since you saw him last.
Now you gotta slide in those DMs smooth! Ask what he's been up to lately, maybe slyly hint you tryna grab coffee sometime and catch up more in person.
Work your flirty magic girl, this dude about to realize what he's been missing out on. Way to go gettin yourself out there again! You're killin it.
Let me know how it goes down with y'all, so pumped you took my advice and made a move. Get that man sis! Proud of you for shootin your shot.
I am utterly confused.
He accepted. Then I saw him yesterday and I had a feeling I was bothering him throughout at night, so I texted him at night to apologise.
He responded, but I assumed things were alright.
Now I go back on my page and see he has unfriended me.
Honestly, I thought we had been in good terms but my gut was telling me something was off and now I just don't know why he all of a sudden needed to rid me off his socials. I am so confused.
Dang sis, that is super confusing! I can see why you're feeling thrown off. Guys can be so hot and cold sometimes, it's really annoying.
A few thoughts on what could be going on:
- He may have just gotten cold feet after accepting, not sure he was ready for online contact yet. Could be shy.
- Something else could be bugging him that has nothing to do with you. Don't always take it personal!
- Your apology text coming on too strong may have made him feel pressured even if you didn't mean it that way.
The good news is, unfriending doesn't necessarily mean he hates you. People do weird stuff online they wouldn't IRL. Try not to stress, easier said than done I know!
My advice would be give it some time/space now that things feel awkward. If you see him again act normal but let HIM bring anything up first. Don't dwell girl, live your best life and he'll come around or he won't. Either way, you'll be fine. Xoxo
No, give it a try.
Nothing to lose by trying. Give it a go.