I have a 38 year old boyfriend who is in jail. Long story short, he thought he was above the law and wasn't. He is out of state and served a 14 month prison term. He gets out at the end of the month. He wanted me to travel with his mom who I barely know for 24 hours one way road trip stopping as we need to, pick him up from jail, travel another 4 hours to where he has to stay for 2 months on probation while his mom stays with him the entire time. I haven't seen him and obviously want to be intimate with him, but not feeling comfortable about it knowing his mom is in another room. I was supposed to stay a week and fly back to where I live so I can work. I thought about this and cancelled my plans. I have no idea what it's like to be in jail, but I bet it's traumatic. I told him it would be better if I weren't there and he should heal on his own. Our relationship was only 5 months until he was arrested. He is very disappointed and hurt. He wanted me there to help him trying to manipulate and guilt me and I'm thinking I don't want any part of creating a co-dependant relationship with him. It's only two months, he can heal, and we can start our relationship over again if he decides to be a better person. I emailed him that. I also sent his mom a text too explaining all of this. Neither of them have responded to me and it's been 5 days. Did I do the right thing? Am I being selfish for not wanting to go down there and help him heal?
1 mo
Am I being selfish?
Updates
1 mo
I think at this point, I'm looking for some closure. The silence is screwing with my head.
