Did my boyfriend have every right to leave me because I was a pushover?

[Anonymous]

My now ex boyfriend and I have been dating for only a month in a half and things were going fine. I’m nice, sweet, helpful and let people do what the can. I always jump in to help and that’s a problem for him. He told I’m too agreeable, let people push me around, always making him choose the places because I wouldn’t chose a place, and I always jump in to solve peoples problems and people seemed annoyed when I always jump in to help. He even once let me take the lead for once because he’s tired of deciding everything. He got upset and said, “Quit agreeing with me! I know there’s some things you don’t agree with! KNOCK IT OFF!!! At least disagree!! It’s okay to have an opinion and disagree. I wish I didn’t have to drag it out of you! I shouldn’t have to.” I thought I had to agree and let people chose because I thought that’s being very nice and I’m trying to sit back and be quiet because I don’t want to cause problems. Even I heard his friends saying that I’m manipulating him because I’m too nice and I’m not very attractive because I’m such a pushover, I can’t fight or defend for myself, I let people disrespect me and talk to me disrespectfully and what man wants to be with a woman like that. He said he may have to reconsider the relationship. I know I shouldn’t be eavesdropping but that really hurt my feelings what his friends said. He once made me choose EVERYTHING for dates. I had to decide on EVERYTHING and it was tiring.
My ex told me we needed to talk and he is fed up with my niceness, scolded me for making things worse by not saying anything or put any effort into choosing places for our dates and I ALWAYS AGREE WITH MOSTLY EVERYTHING HE SAYS and he said I’m not a REAL woman. Then two weeks later he dumped me because he needed a REAL woman. He needed passion. Wow he dumped me! A nice girl?

[Chazmatazz269]

He was right. Always letting other people get their way leads to resentment. When you never make your own choices and occasionally disagree with people, it gets bottled up and the resentment deteriorates your feelings. Nobody is perfectly agreeable all of the time without some underlying pathology. Regardless of the origin of your behavior, it will always sabotage your relationships in one way or another. I suggest you seek help to get at the roots of whatever makes you think you have to agree with everyone all the time. Preferably before you attempt another long term relationship.

[Asker]

I guess so. Even my parents said that being a pushover, agreeable and all that isn’t attractive at all and that’s why my ex left me because it’s like being in a relationship with a robot. Start disagreeing and have my own opinions and choices. My dad HATES that I’m too nice and I need to stop being so damn weak and he didn’t raise a weak woman! My dad got in my face and called me that and yelled at me to stand up for myself and a woman my age should not let that happen.

[sawno]

I'm similar in that I need a girl to tell her honest opinion to be attracted, I wouldn't leave if she doesn't but I'd walk all over her and then be left wondering if she's actually happy. I do think a girl should be able to rely on a guy to decide though, guys need to be able to handle any decision she can't or does not want to pick. But if you let me pick 100% of the time that will feel odd, like were not equals but your plainly my submissive. I prefer her to voice her own wants so we can grow together rather than her adapting to suit me as if I wouldn't love her if she didn't.

[EmmaMary]

What's the title of this romantic novel please.

[Asker]

This is not a novel!

[EmmaMary]

Thank you for the MHO.

[AI Opinion]

Ah, the classic tale of being too sweet and still getting the short end of the stick. In the world of love and dating, balance is key, my dear. While being nice is a lovely quality, everyone appreciates a partner who's a bit spicy and knows how to assert themselves. Confidence is attractive! 🌟

Your ex seemed to crave more passion and decisiveness. It's not about being less nice; it's about being true to yourself and expressing your preferences. If he's looking for a "real" woman, he's clearly missing that you are one—just one who's got more niceness than he could handle. 😏 Keep being you, but take this as a lesson to not shy away from having an opinion.

Chin up, you'll find someone who loves you for your sweetness and your hidden strength! ❤️

[StevenMcGarrett]

Sorry to hear that. You sound like a nice, supporting, and submissive girlfriend. Some guys can't handle that and want to be with a bitch for some reason. Don't worry about your ex. Find a new guy that handle you and appreciate you. Good luck.

[Asker]

Thank you so much

[StevenMcGarrett]

You're welcome.

[MrChinaski]

Your boyfriend can leave you for any reason or for no reason at all. That's how the world works.

[Anonymous]

It's his personal choice.

[Anonymous]

He did wrong

[Opinion Owner]

Here's the situation: a truly feminine woman tries to get along with most people, but she needs to say no to things she doesn’t agree with. Most fail to do this, prioritizing a good image outwardly, which is a classic feminine trait. A real woman often expects the man to take the initiative in most decisions, which is a healthy dynamic in a relationship. It’s a sign of her genuine respect and desire for worth. I think Your ex boyfriend wasn’t a masculine man he was bothered by taking responsibility and couldn’t appreciate your worth