He says he's too stressed to be with me?

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend told me he couldn't handle being with me right now. Every time I asked him what that meant for us he just said idk. I love him so much and he's the first guy I have ever loved but he's breaking my heart right now.

He wants to act like we're in a relationship but not actually be in one because he says things are too stressful for him right now. I told him I'd do anything for him but I won't be left hanging by a thread, so he should decide what he needs to do.

He also told me he can't just end things with me because he loves me too much. But I'm confused as to why he'd only want to be with me partially then. I know he's stressed out, I am too but its unfair to me as well. I don't know what to do and I'm sick of crying 24/7.

Our spring semester just started and I really need to focus so I need him to let me know something so everything won't be so chaotic. I'm not sure what he really wants & I'm not sure what to do..Any advice?

[cashemire]

This is a typical guy reaction to his love issues: that may sound really harsh, but from what I understand he wants to have the candy and eat the candy. Men, or at least the guys that I've known, are usually like that: they feel something is wrong, so they would like to get off the leach for a couple of days, weeks, months- but at the same time, since they don't know what is going to happen next once they've broke up, they try really hard not to burn any bridges. So the one thing I really advise you to do is to make this decision on your own: I know, that you would like to be with him, but "things beying too stressful"" is not a good reason to break up with someone that "you love too much". Plus, I don't think that any guy is worth a girl's tears, and believe me I've cryied my ass off over a bad relationship for a very long time! So what I think you should do is to meet him, and tell him that he needs to choose: either you have a real relationship that includes you and him being exclusive, or you just have to end this because you just can't deal with this anymore. His decision will prove to you, whether he's a real man or not.

PS: the only thing that would make his statements better it's if he is really dealing with important issues right now (but since you didn't mention it, I doubt that you know anything about that

Kisses

[Dubb27]

You shouldn't be crying 24/7 he told you he's stressed and can't be with you right now, so to save yourself the heart ache and confusion, you should take the steering wheel from him and drive the car for a while. Give him his space, go out with your friends to help keep yourself busy. That will give him some time to level things out, if you really mean it, let him know that you will wait for him to get his self together, but let him know you won't stope living your life (that should rattle his cage) and If you mean enough to him, it will start to show, he will fight to be with you if he wants to be. But don't let him be with you half way, its all or nothing

[malekoniky]

I get you. You are stressed, he is too. You love each other and you cannot handle each others' stress right now. Try to relax. It will go much better after some time. Get this stress of your chest from time to time if possible. He fells you being stressed too and he cannot handle that right now. But it will be much better when this stress is gone. That is only goal right now. Get relaxed. He is not going to go anywhere. He said it. Relax and make him relaxed when he is near you if possible. Then you will get stress of his chest too. With stress gone, chaos will be gone and you two will see more clearly what is before you. Right now it's bad to decide, because decisions under pressure are regretted more often. Stress is enemy. Don't give him more by pressuring him but get some off him. Relax him if possible. To do that relax yourself First. you cannot relax anybody while being stressed out. Relax. I am repeating only so you get clear way out of this chaos.

Good luck. Big smile for you.

[Raiden]

Babes don;t cry, your stressing yourself out and panicing, he has not broke off with you, just make some space and get busy doing your stuff and let him relax and get his stress out, and all that will make you two miss one another OK. After all "he loves you too much".