I don't mean to sound silly but I am a HOT 30yo woman. I do anything and everything in the bedroom for him, keep him totally sexually satisfied, and we have fun doing it. Our sex life has always been awesome. I am a great wife. We have fun together. We laugh and play and tease each other like kids. I totally busted him when I found some crap he looked up on the Internet (girls with big fake boobs, wet t shirt contests, big asses, muscular legs, sh*t like that). I was beyond hurt. My last marriage ended because of this and he knew what kind of emotional damage it has left me with. I feel like he chose those other women over me. He says that it's ridiculous to think that! Umm hello?! I told him before we got married that I could basically deal with anything BUT THAT! I'm TRYING with all my heart to move past it but I think about it constantly. He wants me to forgive him but I can't, not when he KNEW the extent of the damage my ex did to me. Now we can't even go to the pool together because I feel that he's eye f***ing every chick that may be up there. I don't want to feel that I'm married to a perv. We have 2 kids together. 10yo boy and 3yo girl. Please someone help me get this sorted out in my head. Thanks.