Sluts Vs. Studs

[Anonymous]

I'll make this as quick as I can.

Women are not "sluts" and men are not "studs".

Promiscuity should not applauded or shamed.

Guys say "men are studs because we have to put in the work to get laid while women only have to blink" Excuse me?

Wait no....EXCUSE YOU!

Women actually go through the tiring process of getting waxed, shaved, hair done, make up, and waist trainers to actually look somewhat similar to the current beauty standards. The thing is, most women do it for themselves. So it's not like we aren't putting in any work, it's just that we work for ourselves. (Most of the time. Other girls, they do it attention)

Also, men are naturally more sex driven than women. So it's not our fault that the majority of guys already have their pants unzipped at the mere thought of a woman even BREATHING their direction. It is not the fault of women that men drown themselves in their own wet dreams, EVERY NIGHT.

Women are more picky. We have been raised to have standards and expectations. And our sex drive is lower in comparison to men. So no, not every woman is going to open their legs for every dogs that wants a bone.

YOU MEN make it easy for women to bag you. Because most of you have little to no self-control.

And women are making it harder, because our social and biological nature has made our thighs touch forcefully like magnets when a dude is trying to approach.

You men can't help that you're so thirsty. And women can't help that they don't get as thirsty because we can store the water like camels.

For the women who do want sex more often than others....she is a slut. A whore. A harlot.

#1. Why are we labeling in the first place?

#2. Why are women knocking other women?

#3. Why can't guys just admit that they're jealous that they can't satiate their thirst so easily?

-It isn't productive trying to shove people in box. You're hurting society by making people feel like they can't express themselves freely without being judged.

-WOMEN! It's time for us to lift up our imaginary balls and be mature. GROW THE HELL UP. Not everything is a fucking competition. So us trying to put each other down is only making the men laugh at us. We are proving all of the misogynistic narcissist right! We are showing them that we are stupid, and that we don't deserve to lead, and that we have no purpose other than to pop out their children, because we are too chicken-headed to do anything else. If all we do is fight each other, we will never get the respect that some of us are still fighting for.

-You guys need to get a grip, jeez. It's sad. Really, it's actually worth fake crying about. You little boys get so threatened by a woman's easy access to you, because you haven't learned how to reject a woman. (This does not apply to all men. Just the ones who believing is calling women sluts.)

You are deliberately knocking women down because they can do something you can't. Grow up and grow a pair. Please and thank you.

...

I have also hear of this misconception that women won't sleep with a guy unless he is this 8 feet tall bad boy with a billion dollar company.

This is so hilarious because it makes me question if more guys are obsessed with 50 Shades of Grey more than women!

For some, this may be true. But seriously, no woman is thinking about all that just for a one night stand. Like i said...get a grip.

Men may be willing to fuck any random (maybe even ugly) random girl, but most women go after an at least decent looking guy.

So, men don't get a pat on the back just because he had more condoms in his purse than the the girl he bagged in the sack.

Women don't get a degrading title for adding a few extra condoms in her purse as well.

Either way, "studs" and "sluts"...the labels are ridiculous and people should really stop this destructive way of thinking.

[StrangerByTheDay]

Thank you for taking the time to share your honest thoughts with us dear Ellie. I took the time to read and I agree with you on mostly everything.
It has occurred to me loads of fights going around in this community between men and women. Calling themselves labels (regardless what they are).
Personally, I don't like to call any woman a "Slut" for its rude definition, otherwise I would be calling my own mother like that. We are all different regardless the gender.
I don't like hookups and I am not into one night stands. Going to bed with a partner, for me, is just a matter of deep emotions, feelings, love, etc... If I just need to satisfy myself, honestly, not ashamed of it, I would masturbate and get rid of the feeling.
I am not going to say anything regarding the "Promiscuity" as for it is another deep subject to aboard another time.
I respect and love women too much. I enjoy talking to them and having real conversations. I have not always been the kind of physically attractive guy, so I take my brain and enjoy mental connection with women.
I have lost my virginity as a teenager for some meaningless sexual encounter just for the entourage to stop pointing at me as a virgin. I sincerely regret this stupid moment.
Regarding the Christian Grey image and fifty shades trilogy story. The real hero in the story is Anastasia. The movies are completely different from the real story. As a woman, she went through hard times to save a sick soul. She succeeded and at the end she won over him. It means she loved him enough to go through the darkest feelings and moments so she could heal the love of her life to become a normal loving husband.
I know you have clearly stated "Most" men and women are killing each other.
My own honest opinion is for us, as human, to start caring for each other more, love and respect each other more, stop criticizing everything and anything.
Regardless the gender, if some people like to have it anyway and anytime they want, then it is their bodies and choices.
If a guy calls a girl "Slut" while he is screwing every woman he encounters then it will make him a "Slut" too.
Some people just project their own image on others to make themselves feel good.
I like your total honesty and how you let your anger out, but it was a bit offensive and based on feelings instead of ration.

Thank you for sharing this writing with us dear Ellie.
My pleasure to take my time reading and writing.

Cheers!!!

[myTake Owner]

I do love the books way more than the movies!!
I didn't mean to be offensive, it's just what i had been hearing lately kind of pissed me off.
also, i wasn't talking about every man or every women... just clarifying that part.
It makes me mad that people in general are bringing each other down, especially when some others may get praised for doing the same thing. Labels are damaging when there's hypocrisy involved.

[StrangerByTheDay]

First dear Ellie let me thank you for the MHO :-D
I totally understand the way you feel and it is good you are letting things off your chest.
When writing about a subject, and you feel too personal, somehow you are going to unintentionally offense someone :-)
I clearly read "Most" and this is what I have mentioned in my opinion, but not everybody did read it. You should have mentioned it more.
I totally agree with you.
We are all different and there are people on earth who are not decent enough.
Respect and love yourself and others around dear even if they try to bring you to a low level!

[JimRSmith]

Meaningless promiscuous sex with strangers is not a particularly sensible lifestyle choice for EITHER gender.

Despite what certain G@G girls apparently believe, men who do this aren't considered especially admirable by most other men, out of their teen years...

[GreatnessBack]

Thank you. I don't know where these people are getting their information from.

[myTake Owner]

I said it shouldn't be celebrated or shamed

[SirRexington]

Give this man MHO.

[NoFcks2Give]

You are taking a very complex social dynamic and simplifying it to justify your ideology. Slut is an adjective or noun, that TYPICALLY describes a woman who is promiscuous, but men also use it to define a woman who cheated. The term in it of itself is largely colloquial like most English descriptive terminology.

There are the prototypical beauty standards for both sexes that exist, and there is some causality to that. Better looking men have access to more women, this is admirable to his male peers, hence terms like "stud" Men set that standard, not women.

A sexually promiscuous woman is a threat to women of her age bracket, but a beautiful sexually promiscuous woman is a villain to her female peers, if for no other reason that men value beauty and age far more than any other attribute. Women are in competition with other women, so the term "slut" is a standard that was set by women.

As far as I can tell, the only men who use the term slut are traditional men who want a wife of there owns someday., but if your a guy trying to get laid you want women to be even more sexual because the motivation demands it. As for guys who are "angry" that women get sex easier, they are having a false equivalency issue.

The very fact that sex comes easier for women, almost ensures that sex is not a woman's primary motivation in the context of relationships.

A womans primary motivation in any relationship is to gain "love". Now I put that in quotes because love to men is very different than the love a woman want. Love to a woman is a culmination of a few things. They want protection, emotional security, loyalty, faithfulness, leadership, family orientated, physical attractiveness, good credit, solid career, and a most importantly time.

What women want is far harder to obtain than sex.

Sex to a man, is what love is to a woman in terms of primordial motivation.

As far as men judging women. It's almost laughable to compare who judges more. It's obviously women, because they have more expectations.

The only time men judge women is typically if they have kids, but this type of judgement only exists if you are in your 20's with children. This is a practicaljudgement though, because if you are a 26 year old man looking to settle down and get married after establishing a career. The last woman you want to put time into is a woman with kids. You are looking to START a family, not take on the resaponsibilities or expectations of her childs father.

[lord_chilled]

Look,
Women who fuck around are sl*ts.
Thats just how it is.

You made the market like that just as much as we did.

If i can get an item for 5€ at one place and for 10€ at another, then my mind will register the first one as cheaper. Thats just how it is. Now in a normal market, the reason why the first one is of lower prize is because it is of lower quality.
Thats the norm.
So, even if they are both of the same quality, unless you try them both out, you would assume its of lower quality.

Thats how it works with everything.
If a woman sleeps around with many men, it looks like she is easy.
At least easier than the woman who only gives it up for the man that commits.
Automatically, she comes in above the "sluttier" woman.

I don't know whats so hard to understand about that.

Now for men, a man needs to put in work to get laid.
And dont give me that lame excuse for putting in work as a woman. You dont have to do any of those things you mentioned.
Really.

All you have to do is lay on your back and spread those legs.
Yes, really.
Shit, you dont have to wear makeup.
You dont even have to shower.
Take a girl that hasn't showered in a month and i will bet my left nut that there are 10 000 men on the planet who would still smash in an instant.

Everything else you do, those things you consider "work" are just cherry on top.

Its not even close for a man.
No man on the planet ever got laid by "getting waxed, shaved, hair done, make up, and waist trainers to actually look somewhat similar to the current beauty standards 😒😒"

Ofc thats what women do, but you get my point.
Men need talent. Or a lot of hard work.
Usually both, but a lot of one may make up for inadequacy in the other.

A man who has gotten laid a lot (unless he has paid for it) basically has social proof as an attractive male. Thats it, you are a stud. The guy obviously is skilled.

Its very simple and logical.
You need to grow up and get on in the real world woth the rest of us, instead of getting emotional about it.
Dont want to be seen as cheap/slutty?
Use the market to your advantage!
Dont sleep with lots of men!
Simple as that!

You win! 😁😁
Even if you got a bit of a shit attitude or a bad personality going on, the sexual behaviour factor can shoot up your smv (sexual market value) or partner market value.

But you cannot choose to f*ck around amd then complain about slut shaming.

[tropicgirl]

If no one know about a girl sleeping around, does that still make her a slut? Or, does that mean that only she knows that she is a slut? Using your metaphor: If you didn't know that you could get an item for $5, you (as a guy) would still pay $10?

[Iamanintrovert]

@tropicgirl she is still a slut. Whatever we buy there will be some value for it. Cheap is always cheap. We. Will know about it after buying for $10.

[Iamanintrovert]

People who don't have it can't find any difference to make themself psycolgically reasonable. but there is always a value.

[levantine99]

its not even a contest who gets it easier. yes we are the somewhat prettier gender, especially with the aid of makeup, but in the end you give us most our power. if men were more of the spiritual type they wouldn't let slut culture thrive. takes two to tango.

[Iamanintrovert]

@levantine99 you are right. All guys are not same. There are guys like me would remain as a bachelor than marrying someone else than our love. We are always left either played or depressed. Like wise I'm now. You don't love true love. Says date, gate , fate. And the truth is they both want sex. I know it with my own experience. It's not about gender. It's about person.

[Iamanintrovert]

You are not a prettier gender. There are pretty people in both gender.

[Kelliecoxs]

I was called a slut for wearing a tight skirt to school ffs

[Iamanintrovert]

@Kelliecoxs I don't think they have brain. You can wear whatever you want. Don't care about fools. Your way of life. Your wish. It should not affect morality , others and naturality. That's it.

[rjroy3]

"Also, men are naturally more sex driven than women. So it's not our fault that the majority of guys already have their pants unzipped at the mere thought of a woman even BREATHING their direction. It is not the fault of women that men drown themselves in their own wet dreams, EVERY NIGHT."

This kind of breaks down the point of your entire post. You're right that it's not the fault of anyone. Just how it is *shrugs*. It's not a blame game. It's just looking at how things are in reality. A girl could choose not to shave, wax or do any number of things you insinuated was necessary and the girl would still get laid. The "work" referred to on the mens part was going after the woman and attracting her.

I do however agree that "slut shaming" is bad and I'm against that. It's a double standard that is stupid. That said, a guy being deemed a stud and a girl being deemed a slut are not mutually exclusive. It's not bad for a girl to sleep around, but to act as if it's not easier for her is silly. But she also doesn't deserve to be shamed for it.

In my mind, it's still pretty impressive for a guy to be accomplished in the sack, with hot girls. It really is a sign that he did enough work to make it happen and handled his own personal shit. A girl can be a hot mess and still get laid on an appreciable scale. *shrugs* just the way it is. It's kind of like saying that it's no less impressive for a 5'4" man to dunk a ball, than a professional nba player who is 6"10". Yea, the nba player can do more spectacular dunks, but the actual act of dunking is easier and a simple dunk is less impressive than a 5'4 guy who had to struggle to make it happen.

[myTake Owner]

A woman can look like a hot mess and still get laid because promiscuous men are too desperate. It really wouldn't be that way if men generally had higher standards. And either way, it's not an accomplishment to sleep around whether you're with attractive people or not.

[rjroy3]

"A woman can look like a hot mess and still get laid because promiscuous men are too desperate. It really wouldn't be that way if men generally had higher standards"

Just reinforcing my point, when you put qualifiers on there. "If men" doesn't matter. The REALITY IS that they don't. Therefore it is in REALITY easier for women. I'm not talking about a Utopian world. I'm talking about REALITY lol. It's harder for men to lead to the act of sex, than women. Just accept that. Put it in your pocket. Take it with you.

Now, the point of whether or not it's right or wrong to shame or applaud the act for a man vs woman is another issue entirely. Personally, I don't think it's something that should be shamed man or woman. But to some extent I can understand a man getting some praise for it, because the REALITY is it is a more difficult experience to be had for him.

[myTake Owner]

This doesn't affect me personally so i acknowledge that it is the reality but it's not necessarily something i have to "accept" because none of this bothers me.
The only thing that bothers me is that promiscuity isn't treated the same on both sides because it's nothing to be proud of or ashamed of.
I understand why men get applauded, and i acknowledged that. But the reasons are still ridiculous, because women are being shamed for doing the exact same thing.

[rjroy3]

"I understand why men get applauded, and i acknowledged that. But the reasons are still ridiculous, because women are being shamed for doing the exact same thing."

That's what matters. And I largely agree with you. Only disagreement really is an opinion of how it's viewed towards a man. I think if slut shaming didn't exist that you wouldn't care either way about men being viewed as a stud, even if you thought the praise itself was a bit silly.

Personally I don't think it's ridiculous, but I'm a man and I know what it's like out there. Someone who goes out and tries can appreciate the difficulty. Someone who doesn't try really can't. That's why a ton of guys "think" they can pickup a girl, but never test themselves. So they can belittle guys who actually try and succeed, while maintaining their false sense of reality that they could the same easily "if they wanted", then follow up with some bs excuse about why they don't.

[Logan27]

First of all women like sex MORE than men. Women usually have more sex than men as well. In the UK the average young woman has had 9 sex partners and for men it's 7. So the whole guys are wild animals thing you got there applies to women just as much as men. Very few men have the ability to be studs, because even the ugliest of women think they are better than their male counterparts. Ever here of the 80/20 rule? It states that 80% of women will only ever fuck the top 20% of guys. Also how do girls NOT look for sex? They go to the club with condoms in their bags, shaved, dolled up with push up bras, maybe stick in a morning after pill in case he was too hot for a condom... come on, it's obvious that girls do this for the intention of getting some random cock at the end of the night. In short, don't insult men and try to make women seem like angels when they're not. One thing though is that most women are sluts (to varying degrees) whereas the extreme majority of guys are not. What do you have to say about that?

[ThisAndThat]

I and two other upped your comment nicely. However, 3 shemales countered our likes.

[Logan27]

Silence usually means guilty. The writer of this take knows I'm right and therefore she didn't reply to my opinion..

[hellionthesagereborn]

Okay, first and foremost yes, it is actually easier for women to get sex then it is for men, that is a fact. For women reproduction is a lot more of an investment then it is for men, that means that women control the "pricing" or market if you will. The party with most to lose generally has greater power because they are not going to invest unless they get more then what they could potentially lose out of it (which is why historically women would not give up sex unless they where married and had that guarantee of a life long commitment of resources and protection something of which men could not demand of a woman). Is it a bit over stated by some men? Yes, their are women who are at the bottom of the totem pole but if we look at equivalently attractive men/women the woman is still more desirable meaning that the least attractive male is less desirable then the least attractive female. This is also why women raise their standards when it comes to casual sex while men lower them.

As for the claim that we should not shame promiscuity, yes we should. Promiscuity has been linked to many issues like depression, anxiety, higher rates of divorce and cheating, marital instability, unhappiness in long term relationships etc. We also know that according to surveys marriage affords people the highest levels of happiness (as it pertains to relationships) meaning that promiscuity is actually detrimental to the individuals happiness plus the happiness of any prospective partners not to mention creates an unstable environment for children and thus puts their potential offspring at risk as well (children of divorce are more likely to develop depression, suffer from academic failure, commit suicide, become promiscuous themselves thus perpetuating the problem etc.).

[DevilsAdvocator]

By the way, did you know that the female equivalent of a "stud"- a male animal retained for the purpose of breeding- is actually a "brood bitch"? Now, tell me- if you were called "brood bitches" instead of "sluts", would you deem that to be a compliment, or would you deem it to be even more insulting? The term 'stud' is far more offensive in its origin, and in the connotations it carries, than 'slut' ever was. But the difference is that men simply choose not to get their boxers in a twist over it, whereas you women have to be 'TRIGGERED!' by it. If you truly felt that being a slut really wasn't anything to be ashamed of, the way that most men feel that being a stud isn't anything to be ashamed of, then the concept of 'slut-shaming' wouldn't exist any more than the concept of 'stud-shaming'; you wouldn't feel any more shame about it than we do. But you do. And that has nothing to do with the big bad bogeyman of 'DA PATRIACHY'; it's in your own heads. Are you proud sluts, or not? Because you can't claim to proudly be something, then say that others are shaming you for calling you what you're loudly proclaiming that you're proud to be.

[Anonymous]

Never judged because I simply do not care what other people do with their lives and don't see why anyone else should care since it's not hurting them. I also don't believe that it should be praised, manly becaus eof all the unwanted pregnancies, missing fathers, and the large amount of STD's being spread around (even unknowingly).

The thing I usually hate about these arguments on slut shaming and you didn't do this but I'm just throwing it out there. It's that guys who prefer a woman who isn't promiscuous are labelled as slut shaming even though they don't care or shame a woman for being promiscuous but just don't want to date them theirselves. I mean if the guy is promiscuous then yeah he's a hypocrit but if the guy isn't promiscuous and wants a woman who's the same as him then there's nothing wrong with that.

I'm personally not promiscuous because that's just not me. A close friend of mine she is promiscuous and I don't care. I don't advocate a promiscuous life style personally just because I see all the pain, drama and complications it brings her in her life. Plus on top of that she's always complaining how guys are trying to sleep with her even ough that's the perosnality and vibe she puts out there (on top of being intentionally flirty).

Though yeah in response yeah I agree that we shouldn't shame or promote promiscuous behavior. Though I will be honest and say that one should accept whatever consequences come from that behavior, whethe rit be unwanted pregnancies with an unknown fathers, std's or just guys assuming you're open to sex and wanting to try their luck.

[Anonymous]

Women are vastly, exponentially, hornier than men. A woman will do just about anything, sexually speaking, so long as she is fairly certain she won’t get caught. For example, we will occasionally go out of town in order to rendezvous with a man we’ve been longing to fuck, and/or to have multiple sex partners in the same evening, and/or at the same time.
This is something that hot women do, most especially. In our minds, it is a natural desire, and a natural thing, and so long as nobody else finds out, it’s “game on”. Women are receptacles for cock, that’s how we have been biologically designed. Nothing feels better to us than being completely filled up with multiple penises, than being the center of sexual attention, than being the object of unbridled group lust. Since it’s something we can’t risk doing on our home turf (don’t shit where you eat), we have to think outside the box, in order to get our boxes completely satisfied. And you might find this shocking, but many women – many, many women – have sex with dogs on a routine basis. This is just one example of how insatiable we truly are.
I can see why you might not believe it, to which I say, look really hard at all of the women you know who have dogs. Look at women who have dogs whenever you see them out on the street, in the act of walking those dogs. Or at the park. You will notice that most of them have male dogs – the vast majority, in fact. This isn’t a coincidence. And look at all the female teachers who are exposed in the media for having sex with underage students. We have no self-control when it comes to sex – or anything else, for that matter. To our way of thinking, losing control is what makes sex great. Doing anything that is taboo is what makes sex great.

[JayMichigan616]

That's real AF.

[Balacan]

"Women are more picky. We have been raised to have standards and expectations."

"Because most of you have little to no self-control."

The first sentence is true, as we have way lower standard for sex or relations without commitment, but beware, for relationships, our standard are way higher, especially in non physical aspects.

Yet i think the second is false. We are more open to sex, and don't blame (what a bad way to say it) a sexual encounter on "i lost my head" or "didn't knew what i did". Its very easy to rebuff a woman, but most men just don't care i think.

Historically, women took the risk of unplanned pregnancy when having sex, and i think we are in the afterwaves of that, and hence for us sex is a risk free affair, while a woman image is still on that maybe outdated image.

There is also the belief that a woman appearing more open to sex will be that way to any good looking guy, without any respect to the guy she is currently with, and hence will have no fidelity in a relationship.

Mmm, that argument is actually also true to studs, but do women actually care about it? Wait, actually that would be a question, why are you attracted to studs to begin with?

[myTake Owner]

I'm not attracted to "studs"

[Balacan]

sorry, that was not a personal question. I should have wrote "you women".

[Anonymous]

"current beauty standards."
As if guys have no pressure to look good.
No one asks you to go the the lengths you do.
It's not the guy in the street inventing these beauty standards, you're imposing them on yourself.
"we work for ourselves"
If you're doing it for yourself, then you have no business complaining about it to men.

"men are naturally more sex driven than women"
So in other words, yes it's not your fault but you're saying it's true. No one was making the argument that it's your fault... only that it's reality.

"Why are we labeling in the first place?"
We give things names to distinguish one thing from another.

"Why are women knocking other women?"
Because they disapprove of the behaviour themselves.

"Why can't guys just admit that they're jealous that they can't satiate their thirst so easily?"
They are. Again you're making out like it's someones fault and blame needs to be correctly placed. No, the simple point is that it's reality.

"We are showing them that we are stupid, and that we don't deserve to lead"
You're demonstrating a willingness to disregard people's feelings and prioritise your own. It's not a quality we're going to cherish in a leader.

"You are deliberately knocking women down because they can do something you can't."
There are women do can do what men can't and still don't get called sluts so that breaks your logic.

You asked to stop with labels while at the same time your whole take explained the necessity of the labels...

[John_Doesnt]

This is a great point. Guys get blasted with unfair beauty standards too, but we don't bitch about it nearly as much.

[englisc]

I do think that promiscuity should be shamed. You say that it hurts society when people are shamed and judged for doing certain things - I'd say the opposite is true. Shame, judgement, honour - all of these things in the past prevented people from doing things that would harm themselves or society as a whole. Promiscuity leads to more STDs, more Fatherless children, statistically the more partners somebody has the more likely they are to divorce - these are the reasons promiscuity has always been judged and shamed. Women can get it easier, true, that's probably why they get shamed more. I'm not saying that men shouldn't get the same treatment, just that this idea that everybody should be able to do whatever they want free from shame and judgement is a silly idea.

[myTake Owner]

Shaming people isn't doing anything positive. If it bothers people so much, how about instead of ridiculing people, get them to understand your point of you and try to convincing them that not being promiscuous is a better way of living. Shaming isn't making people want to be better.
Also, women having it easier is the fault of men for not being able to say no. So, both genders share equal blame. Educate people. Show them another way instead of making them feel like shit because they'e only gonna think that you're judgmental (which is true). And they will feel like they'd rather continue their ways because they wouldn't want to be like other people who are basically bigots.

[englisc]

Today people just don't understand how shaming works or why people did it in the past, and they're more concerned with feelings than facts, so they automatically think that any kind of shaming or judging is automatically bad. In the past it was what held a community together. They didn't need as many laws or harsh punishments like for example jail because shame was enough - it was a lesser form of punishment for any behaviour that was unhealthy or bad for society as a whole.

Educating people makes little difference, most people tend to ignore any evidence that contradicts their worldview - I've had many conversations about these things, with solid evidence, historical examples, and it's almost always the same end result. More of those people will avoid something if they know that others will look down on them and make them feel ashamed.

I don't mind being seen as judgmental, I don't see it as a bad thing. Everybody judges, even those who think they don't.

[myTake Owner]

Educating isn't helping. Okay, i understand. Shaming isn't helping either. Times have changed, and it doesn't work. And there's no need to think of promiscuity as a bad thing, they aren't hurting anyone. Yes, disease has come into play. So that's why we teach safe sex. The problem is that parents don't want to accept or acknowledge that even children are interested in sex. But that's the reality. So that's why we need more condoms at school and courses about STD's and STI's. It's not encouraging them, it's making sure that stuff like disease and pregnancy won't happen. When the disease eventually drops, and people continue to be promiscuous, there won't be any problem. And there will be less need to shame people for doing what they want. Because it's not affecting you or society.

[englisc]

Shaming works. It's the lack of shame that causes people to become more promiscuous. I gave a few examples of how promiscuity is bad for people and society. Most people know about condoms, STD risks, they still don't use them anyway because they can't be bothered. This is what I'm talking about when I say that educating people and trying to convince them with logic is a waste of time - they still continue to believe what they want to believe and they have naive views of how the world works.

[myTake Owner]

I'm just saying, because times have changed, judging isn't helping either.
Even when guys don't sleep around, some of them still don't care to be a father because of serial monogamy. You don't have to sleep around to want to abandon you responsibilities.
The divorce thing doesn't really matter because less and less people are getting married. Not being married isn't a bad thing.
Yes, STD's are bad. That's true. That will take time to go away. Kids nowadays are more date than their parents were, so i truly believe that STD rates will go down with time.

[myTake Owner]

are more safe* than their parents...

[englisc]

Often when it comes to this people say that times have changed so we need to change. I don't think that's a good argument because it doesn't mean that times have changed for the better. We have more divorce, more STDs, more Fatherless kids, more obesity. All because these things, or at least the things that happen that result in these things, have become less shameful. I agree that there are men who abandon responsibilities, this again is down to a lack of shame. In the past for example a man who didn't work and provide for his family would be shamed, now there are many who are content to refuse to work and instead rely on welfare, which should only be there to help those genuinely in need rather than being a lifestyle choice. STDs will be a problem as long as promiscuity is a thing. Many promiscuous people get drunk to the point that they can barely walk and have sex with a randomer. That's normal today - and those people are less likely to take care of things like condoms.

[myTake Owner]

It's already frowned upon to abandon your child, there is shame. The thing is... NOBODY CARES
You can shame all you want, but people are still gonna do what they want.
It's against the law to murder, molest, to fraud, to not pay taxes, but prisons are still full and packed. And even when they get out, some of them STILL do the same thing. So shaming doesn't work. Not today. And i'm not saying things have changed for the better. I'm just saying, the old ways aren't working. So there's no point in doing the same thing, expecting a different result.

[englisc]

The thing is the way people are acting today isn't actually anything new. In the past many societies have gone the same way, with more promiscuity and more degenerate behaviour in general, because the society became more shameless. Those societies always, without fail, either collapsed or were invaded by stronger societies because they became so weak as a result of those things. The reason those things don't work anymore is because we live in a shameless society.

[InTimoreDei]

Yup, I agree fully @englisc but don't bother trying to change Ellie-V's mind... she won't change lol

[ObscuredBeyond]

Promiscuity is shameful, actually. But it is so across the board, for both. The double standard goes back to Caesar. He knew he'd lose key support if he ordered men to stop their adulterous ways. So he settled for a halfway, and simply ordered women to cease their adulterous ways.

This resulted in women not wanting to be shamed across Rome, and thus refusing advances they previously would have embraced without hesitation, since Rome was becoming decadent.

This angered some men, who found they couldn't have easy access to just anything they pleased. Others were relieved, as it meant their wives would face actual penalties for cheating and fraud, and would have more incentive to be faithful.

However, Moses among others knew that a half-way solution is ultimately no solution at all. It needs to be understood as disgraceful, and that has to go both ways.

[Aki6000]

The differing views on promiscuity is probably a remnant of the way of thinking of pre-modern societies and certainly has no place in modern civilisation. However just like the phrase 'old habits die hard' it's difficult for long-standing mentalities to change. We are slowly but surely changing our views on such things but it'll probably take a while before it is rendered obselete.

[myTake Owner]

I agree homie!

[Anonymous]

Like they say, a key that can unlock any lock is a master key.
A lock that is opened by any key is just a shitty lock.

Men are the key, women are the lock.

It doesn't matter what you say, you're not changing basic human biology.

Women who have a lot of open sex will not be respected for that. They're just easy sluts.

Whereas men who have a lot of sex are clearly the in the top percentage of men and therefore should be looked up to, and they are. Men who have a lot of sex have a lot of other men wishing to be like them and a lot of women chasing after them wondering when there turn will be.

[lilaqua]

You clearly don't understand basic human biology.

[Opinion Owner]

@lilaqua Do you have the mental capability to actually explain something or are you only capable of making pointless one liners?

Men initiate sex. Men are capable of having multiple sex partners. Women aren't because they get pregnant, therefore women are supposed to be very selective, not have sex with a different man every night.

Obviously in modern day we have protection so it doesn't apply, however it's still ingrained within us.

[Ginfiend]

Actually, opinion owner- women can only get pregnant 3-4 days a month- not evry day- intelligent women (and men) have known this historically.

The men v women in the promiscuity stakes is a product of society's opinions surrounding the concepts of virginity and purity- not a biological product, not a superiority product.

[lilaqua]

You fundamentally don't understand why humans have sex. Our drive and need to have sex is social reasons, to foster a sense of togetherness and to bond with those in our community. We were built to have sex will many many people, both of the same and different sex. In our traditional state there was not a concept of parenthood that exists like there does today, the rearing of children was a group effort so there was little incentive to be monogamous. It's pretty well researched that naturally women probably had sex with upwards of five men within one session. There are multiple biological processes that suggest this. Compared to the male orgasm, the female orgasm takes a much longer period of time and we are capable of having more than one if a shorter period of time. In general men are built for speed, women for endurance. This does suggest that women would have likely had really elongated sex sessions with multiple people.

[lilaqua]

Men's semen also produces a form of spermicide that aims to kill the sperm of another man that was presumably in there in the first place. It's also fascinating to learn that why women are so loud during sex is actually a mechanism to draw other men to where the woman is. If you want to know more, read "Sex at Dawn"

[Opinion Owner]

@Ginfiend Did I say women get pregnant every day?

[Opinion Owner]

@lilaqua You know what, I rarely say this to people on here. But you've brought forward a lot of feasible arguments that I will definitely look into.

[lilaqua]

well thank you.

[SirRexington]

@lilaqua ahh, Sex at Dawn, the book written by an idiot disproven by evolutionary biologists everywhere.

[Wwwyzzerdd]

@SirRexington Took the words outta my mouth lol

[DashboardLight]

I get triggered by how much you say: ''You men do this'' or ''Men do that'' like we all are the same

''Men may be willing to fuck any random (maybe even ugly) random girl, but most women go after an at least decent looking guy.'' (I doubt that by the way)

''You men can't help that you're so thirsty.'' (Sorry?)

''Men are naturally more sex driven than women. So it's not our fault that the majority of guys already have their pants unzipped at the mere thought of a woman even BREATHING their direction. '' (Which is a laughable statement in the first place)

''Guys say "men are studs because we have to put in the work to get laid while women only have to blink"'' (Never heard anyone say that)

I don't know what kinda guys you come across, but they definitely ain't the best of what you can get in this world. These are all assumptions and you put them in your take like they are facts. Crazy how you're indiscriminating here.

[myTake Owner]

I specifically said that it only applied to those who believe in slut shaming

[myTake Owner]

I'm only referring to AND WOMEN who fit with the realm of the problem i am addressing. I am well aware that not all women and men are the same or have the same thinking.

[DashboardLight]

@Ellie-V
Where? I couldn't find it in the thread

[myTake Owner]

It's in the last line of the paragraph where i say you men need to get a grip.
Look below the numeric points.
I guess i should have said that first, but when i was writing it, i had realized that people would assume i'm talking about every guy in the world. I'm not. Should have wrote that part sooner, my bad. And i am addressing women as well, so it's not like i'm targeting men. I was trying to be universal but the execution was weak. Sorry.

[DashboardLight]

@Ellie-V
Ah OK. Well, er... skip this comment then ;)

[myTake Owner]

ok lol XD

[Anonymous]

Typical feminazi detected. You did so many false generalizations about guys and even didn't notice that. Grow up, girl! All guys are different. There are a lot of guys who have self-respect and would not bother any woman by unnecessary and unwanted attention.

Usually I'm against slut shaming but it can be helpful for educational purpose. When I will have a daugter I will teach her not to behave like promiscucious women do, because it's bad and immoral (though I would not use words like "slut" or "whore"). You can't forbid people to have their own opinion and express it when it's reasonable. In another case it's not my business which life choices grown women do.

[myTake Owner]

I said it only applied to those who believed in slut shaming. And i also addressed women as well, so i wasn't targeting one set of people. And i'm not a feminist, thank you

[levantine99]

yeah the ignorance and generalisations were astounding. for both genders.

[Anonymous]

Honestly... my real thing about girls who want to sleep around... they are doing it because... they think they are "hot stuff" and that they are so "beautiful" that they can get a guy. Usually these kinds of girls will PUT other girls down, for not having as much sex and finding a guy like they do. They do it out of competition and LOW self esteem, because they feel so low they have to go have sex with men to feel better about themselves. That's the impression I get with girls who wanted to sleep around. This is honest from my experience with a close up person in my life. I didn't have sex until I was ready for marriage, and only slept with one guy because... hey I'm not trying to prove to the world that I can "bag it". That's for people who like to brag, get attention and are drama queens who are full of it.

[ManOnFire]

This is very, very true.

[SirRexington]

When will women get it? Men do not like men who treat women like objects and prizes to be one. We call them fuck boys, assholes, douchebags, a himbo and other pejoratives. We don't like womanizers, we find them to be despicable and a bad name to men everywhere. And we will not hesitate to warn an unsuspecting woman that she should be weary of his advances.

Also, if you have sex with guys that are not your lover and are simply men you are tossing around like salad for your own pleasure then you are a slut. Get over it. Act like a slut, you're gonna get the lovely title of being one. If a person acts like a jerk, guess what? That person is probably a jerk and will get called out for it.

Do NOT think you can censor others speech. We want to call you out for acting in an undesirable manner, then you best be able to take account for your actions. Take responsibility, own up to what you are. Don't try to sugar coat and water down the truth. It won't work.

[NoFcks2Give]

Speak for yourself, there is no reason at all for one man to be worried about what another man does with his dick. I don't play kid games like that. That shit sounds like jealousy.

[Maxemeister]

First of all I agree that sluts and whores don't actually exist.

However, aggressing towards men isn't really where I would go if I were you. 1: It turns your target market against you. Trying to make men angry at you definitely won't help your case. 2: Women are actually more often the culprits of slut shaming. This isn't only men, this is a society problem.

[myTake Owner]

I understand what you are saying, and i have addressed women as well, if you read the whole thing.